Need some help reg child care questions (new in UK)

[MommyMaggie]

I'm new to the UK and just moved to London from Sweden with my husband and two boys (one 15 months and one 2,5, almost 3, years old). My husband is away for work 7-7 mon-fri and I am planning to get our business started by working 2-3 days a week for a few hours. To begin with.

Since we moved here just 2 weeks ago everything is new and confusing for the kids so I don't want to rush them into nursery/pre-school too early. But eventually I will need some kind of child care and that is why I'm asking you, experienced UK mums, for advice? I'm so new to this and I'm so confused by everything people tell me?

1. Firstly, what is the difference between a nursery and a pre-school? What would you recommend for our needs? The kids do not speak english, but we want them to learn in their own pace.

1. I read about a few nurseries/pre-schools in London before we got here and they seem to be very expensive (at least £800 a month for each child!). Comparing to swedish fees, which are about £100 for the same period of time, the pricing just seems insane to me. Is it really this expensive in London or am I just looking in the wrong places?

1. People I have spoken briefly to about this, seem to think that public (private?) options are the only way to go since everything else is crap. Is that really true and if not, what should we look for?

1. I know that this is just too crazy to be true, so please correct me. Someone told me that hitting children is allowed in the UK and that this is common in nursery/pre-school/school? Please tell me that is not the case. In Sweden all kinds of punishing the children is considered to be wrong and hitting children is against the law.

These are the main things I'm wondering about at the moment. Can someone please straighten it out for me?

If someone could recommend a nice non-religious child care option for us in the Woolwich area it would be nice as well :)

Thanks and have a great evening ladies!

1. Nursery and day care could be different names for the same thing or they could be very different; descriptions blur Daycare nursery is F/T (often 8-6 or longer) & you buy sessions or days as you need Nursery can be preschool, or playgroup or in a school Childminders are a good option 2)London you are looking at £5-£9 per hour 3)Generally only Nursery Classes in schools are state operated & these can be staffed at a ratio of 1:13 for 3yos 4)Corporeal punishment is completely banned by Early Years workers under any circumstances. Time out and 'thinking about what you have done' are much more prevelent

PS my Brother & his family live in Stockholm so I know some of your issues quite well

Hi, and welcome!

I'm no expert, but I'll try and answer what I can and at least that will give you a bump for others to see your thread.

1. As I understand it, nurseries are private and you pay for them. We used to pay about £35 for a full day - 7am to 6pm if needed - but that is Up North, not London. Nurseries tend to be open for most of the year. Maybe closed for a couple of weeks at Christmas.

Pre-schools are attached to primary schools (I think) and are either free or a small fee, but they are only open school hours, so 9am ish to 3.30pm ish. Shut for school holidays. Of course, if you choose a private, fee-paying school, the pre-school would cost as well.

1. I think it sounds like Sweden have amazing subsidised childcare - £100 for a month?? Wow! Like I said, we paid about £35 per day, or about £120 for a full week.

1. I have no idea about the quality of childcare near you - it probably varies by area. You can look on Ofsted for inspection reports, but going to meet the staff and look around will give you a better feel.

1. I think the law says that we are allowed to chastise children physically as long as it doesn't leave a mark but I've never EVER heard of this happening in nurseries or schools. Usually only parents, and most people on here would not agree with smacking I think.

Good luck!

this is reassuring

Maggie I completely sympathise with your predicament. I didn't grow up in the English school/pre-school system either and I have to say sorting it all out was probably the most stressful part of having kids so far for me.

The whole confusion stems from the private (independent) vs. state sector division in education and nursery provision. We don't have that divide where I come from (Canada) and I suspect that is true of Sweden as well!

Day nurseries will mostly be private and quite expensive. Children are entitled to 15 free (state-funded) nursery hours per week but only from their third birthdays. I agree with KatyMac that you should look at childminders.

Good luck - just take a deep breath and keep asking questions!

1. Nurseries are privately owned (except for surestart ones) and offer full day care and education, usually 7.30 am- 6pm (though they will all have different opening times) and take babies from a few weeks old
   pre-schools are sessional i.e they have morning and afternoon sessions (though some do provide wrap-around care) and are mostly open term time only. They take children from 3, though some do take 2 year old
   so if you want 3 full days a week, every week for your 3 boys together in the same place then a private day nursery will be your best bet

2. childcare is very expensive in the uk, compared to Sweden. Children are entitled to 15 hours free nursery education grant from the term after they turn 3 which covers term tims only (most private nurseries csn deduct thie from your bill if you need them to arrend for longer than the 25 hours)

3. all settings, private and state run have to follow the Early Years Foundation Stage

4. hitting children is NOT allowed in any early years setting or school- private or state funded. Nor is shouting or humiliating children

4. Corporal punishment has been banned in all schools (state and private) and for all age groups since the 1990s.

1. I work in a nursery and we are open 8.00 -6.30, the day is divided into 2 sessions, ending or starting at 1.15. We charge parents for a full day, or for a session. We are also bringing in a higher rate charge for adhoc hoc hours used. We charge £47 a day, on average, we are in Hertfordshire. We have a preschool room, which is 3-4years 11 months. Which is just the same as the rest of the nursery, so this may be confusing to people thinking of a separate pre school.

Some schools have pre-school rooms or nursery rooms attached to them, usually in a separate building within the school grounds, most children who attend this usually stay at the school, but some do attend a different school. These are almost always free, or a small charge is added and as some one else stated, the hours usually fit into school hours, although you could pay for breakfast club, and after school club to get more hours if needed.

Childminders are a good option, your boys would be together, and they often work out cheaper then nurseries.

You could look into a nanny, (although i imagine this would be very expensive) or a nanny share, which would reduce the costs.

We have looked after and currently look after children who do not speak English, what we ask for is words that are familiar to the children to allow us to communicate with them, while they are learning a new language, e.g cup, food, sleep, mum, dad e.t.c Providing this kind of list will help your children relax and bond with new carers, and help them feel comfortable in their new setting, and also allow communication which will help tremendously.

2. Oh i kinda answered that in the first one

3. There are lots of childcare options out there, i would research what its the best in your area, by speaking to your neighbours, going to your local parks and asking parents what options they use, and what they don't and why!! Look at all the childcare options available, go in and look at the settings, to give yourself a good idea of whats there. Ask lots of questions (have a good think or what you want, whats important to you) write a list, and take it with you so you don't forget to ask something. Look at how the children interact with the staff, how they play with each other. Please PM me if you need anymore info.

4. The only punishment allowed in childcare is time outs, where we take the child out of the situation to a different area, depending on the age they are encourage to think about what they have done and why they are sitting there, and then after a while they are taken to the child and it is discussed why the behaviour is wrong, and what we should say. (this really is only for older children though, younger children are removed from these situation to calm down and have some time away, hugs are encouraged but really its the consistency which works in the long run) IN NO WAY IS A CHILD EVER HIT, SMACK OR ABUSED IN CHILDCARE.

Gosh, I completely forgot about answering this thread! So sorry. Thank you so much for taking the time to answer and to straighten out my worries :) We haven't found anything for us yet and as we are thinking about moving to a different part of London in a few months, applying to anything feel rather pointless atm...