Tell me the transition of putting your dc into nursery gets better!

[GiantUnderCrackers]

My 8.5 month old dd started her transition into nursery yesterday :-(. She did an hour yesterday, 2 today and will build up to a full day by the end of the week. Will do 2 days a week from next week and then when I return to work in mid March will be full time...At the end of both sessions today and yesterday she has been really upset and hysterical and wouldn't eat there. She seems so little. I want to be home with her but I need to go back to work next month. I have to go back full time. At the moment I know it is v v early days but tell me about your good experiences and transitions of putting your babies into nursery so I feel better. I like the nursery we have chosen, the staff are lovely, the baby room is nice, they haven't allocated a key worker for dd yet until she shows a particular liking for one of them. I am trying to objective but her tears have really upset me today. Happy stories from anyone please! It does get better doesn't it?!

Hi Giant - I have posted about nursery on here before. My DS1, 2 and 3 all went off to daycare at 10 weeks. They were 4 days a week (sometimes 5 if I was super busy) and then into prep school at 3 full time. I had no other options as I had no maternity leave at all (I run my own business). Your DD absolutely will get used to it - I would advise if you have another to start them as early as possible as then it is second nature. The most important thing is that you are happy with the nursery (which you are) and look on it as a positive thing for her, rather than feeling that you are abandoning her (which you are absolutely not). If you are worried dropping her off she will sense it, it's a state of mind that you have to get into. Just persevere, it will get better and easier for both of you, it has to! Please don't feel guilty for leaving her - my boys have absolutely not been adversely affected at all. In fact they are incredibly confident and adaptable.

This is not quite what you want to hear, but it didn't get better for me so I moved my DD out and now have a wonderful childminder instead - both of us now much happier. I'm not suggesting you should go down that path without giving the nursery a good try - and you like the nursery which helps - I'm just saying it might help you to realise that there are always other options too. Good luck with it

It does get better. My dd1 was tearful in the beginning at drop off and pick up but it slowly got better as she got more settled. She has now been going since she was 9 months and is now 2.5 yrs and she loves it

DS went to nursery when he was about the same age and has absolutely thrived. Each time he has moved to a new room he has struggled a little for the first week or two and I'm now going to have to move him into a new nursery closer to home (which I'm dreading), but once that time has passed he has loved it. When I arrive to pick him up (he's now 2 1/2) he wants me to sit and play with me and his friends rather than go home! There's something so lovely about hearing him talk about how he's looking forward to seeing certain friends or doing a particular activity at nursery - especially as I know that some things (like playing with shaving foam or drawing with chalk outside) I just couldn't do at home even if I didn't work.

My DD1 started when she was a bit older- 13 months- and it was quite difficult at first, lots of tears when she was dropped off. But she stopped crying very quickly once we had left, and was fine for the rest of the day. I don't remember how long it took, but we got to the point where she walked happily into the room and sat down for breakfast without even a backwards glance.

She went through another difficult phase when she changed rooms, and started crying at drop-off again. Again, it didn't last too long and she was always fine once we left.

DD1 is now 3.6, she'll be moving on from nursery to school in september and I can honestly say that it's been brilliant for her, she loves the staff, has lots of friends and loves telling us what she's been up to. The staff there are so caring and know her really well.

My 15 month old has been at nursery since 12 months. He was initially doing 2 mornings a week, then 1 full day then 2 full days. He cries at pick up and drop off but has a lovely time when he's there. He's actually been in full time for the last two weeks due to various circumstances, and I thought that might help him get less upset when we leave him but it doesn't seem to have changed. However, I know a number of people who said theirs did the same thing for a while too - I just don't know how long it will last!

I can empathise with you, my DS started nursery 5 weeks ago, and the first four weeks were hard for both of us! I wonder if you could decide yourself who you would like to be your baby's keyworker and get her into a pattern of being dropped off consistently with that one person. (I started a thread on this last week so it's something I have given a lot of thought to!). I don't really like the woman who is meant to be my DS's keyworker and I would love to be able to choose myself!

Everything I've read around research into childcare says that what children need is a trusting, consistent relationship with their carer - ideally that is Mum but when childcare takes over, you ideally want one person taking a lead role in caring for your child at key points in the day. I found the drop off for my DS really bad because it was always a different person taking him from me.

This week he has been fine at drop off (he does two days a week), so he seems to have adjusted, but I'm still going to see a childminder tomorrow because I may go for that option.