problem with keyworker at nursery

[katherine76]

Looking for some advice about what's normal with keyworkers at nursery...

My DS started nursery 4 weeks ago, he's 10 months old and doing two full days. He had a couple of two hour settling in sessions before he started, at which point I was introduced to his key worker. Even at the settling in sessions she showed no interest in engaging with my DS, or me.

Since he started, dropping him off in the morning has been v stressful as I never know which of the four staff in the babyroom I'll be handing him over to. Often his keyworker is in the room and can see he's crying but she doesn't even come over! She is meant to fill in his daily diary of nappies etc but it seems to be just anyone that does it.

I feel bad that my DS hasn't had a smoother transition into nursery with consistent care from his key worker. I get that they all work as a team, but why bother having a key worker if she doesn't do anything different from the rest?! MY DH thinks I'm overreacting, and in other ways I am happy enough with the nursery but I just wondered if this was normal or what other's experiences have been?

Thanks!

I don't know about nursery for babies as I never used one.

But I will say that I removed my 3 year old from a pre school I wasn't happy with, partially because her keyworker showed so little interest in her and seemed to wash her hands of her (and she really isn't a difficult child).

At ten months I'd be more inclined to take her out of nursery and send her to a childminder but of course I don't know your circumstances or how the rest of your DS' care is going at the nursery.

Don't be afraid to move him though, if your instinct tells you something is wrong.

I'm sure there are fab nurseries around but everything you've listed as happening were my reasons for choosing a CM rather than a nursery. At least with a CM you know the keyworker is there every day and looking after your ds (assuming they are a good CM - there are good and bad CMs as there are good and bad nurseries).

If it were me I would be talking to the manager and telling them my concerns.

Same with my first boy. He was assigned a key worker but I just handed him over to whoever was free in the morning and picked him up from whoever in the evening. I didn't like this but never said anything as they alwasy seemed so stressed and run off their feet when I picked him up I didn't want to come across as an interfering mother. His key worker sounds disinterested so maybe try and engage/charm her by asking her direct things like "how was he today?", "how much did he eat?" Some of the staff at our nursery are lovely but at least half seem to dislike the job.

Ive had different experiences at two different nurseries, at one , ds had a key worker, but the staff were very much a team, and, apart from doing obs and filling in the paperwork, you wouldnt really know who the keyworker was. This was not a problem as it was a small nursery with 2 staff in the baby room, and I was happy that they both focused equally on ds.

In ds2s nursery, the key worker is much more invovled than other staff and he is obviously under her care ( she is a star!) Both systems worked well and both dcs were happy at both nurseries.

I think the main prob is that your ds' keyworker doesnt focus on ds, whether or not she is his keyworker, I would expect a nursery worker to relate to all their charges.

I think you should chat to the manager to express your concerns, if you are otherwise happy with your nursery, it may be easily resolved

I agree with MollieO. My personal opinion is that young children and babies should be in something as close as possible to a home environment, with a single important person e.g. a childminder. By all means, go and speak to the nursery manager, but perhaps you could also go and visit a couple of childminders to see whether their care would suit your ds better.

You are not over reacting! I would be mentioning everything you posted here to the manager.

This doesn't seem right to me. My DD (12 months) goes to nursery and has done since she was 5 months old. She adores her key worker and other members of staff.

When we arrive she holds her arms out to her key worker, the room supervisor and other people she knows. She does this immediately because the routine is to take the babies and give them a welcoming cuddle and then settle them into an activity/play etc. All the staff seem genuinely pleased to see her when I drop her off.

I agree that a nursery is never going to be consistent the way a childminder is, the staff should be welcoming and ready to engage with the child. My nursery tries to ensure it is the key worker or someone else known to us who we drop DD off to and wh completes the diary, but sometimes that isnt possible. Even if DD's keyworker is with another child, she wil always ensure she comes to say helo to DD immediately when she is there.

I would definitely be speaking to the room supervisor or manager.

I used a nursery for DS at about this age. It was a small setup but his keyworker always took charge of him in the morning and was there to hand him back in the afternoon complete with a summary sheet containing details of his naps, meals and nappy usage with a personal comment about how he had been that day. Only exception I can remember was when she was sick or on holiday.

Definitely raise your concerns. It's hard enough to leave your precious baby at nursery even without these sort of worries.

Doesn't sound right to me either. DD is 1 and has been full time at nursery for a few weeks. Her key worker only works 3 days but she has an assigned carer the other two days. All the members of staff know her name and greet her or say goodbye.

Even when I pick up DD after work, she will hold her arms out to be held by key worker if we're having a little chat. She likes to swap between people in the room.

thanks so much for all the replies. I think I will have a chat with the manager of the baby room, and maybe look at a couple of child minders as well. I only went to meet one and it was a bit of a depressisng experience so it put me off, but I have been thinking about re-visiting the idea.

I would like to think that the manager of the room would be horrified you feel like this - their reaction may be key to how you feel about continuing to use the nursery. Don't write all nurseries off on this experience, some are wonderful. Hope you get a good response.

I think a keyworker is really important for babies in nursery. (I had my first child in nursery from 6 months old and he was fine, btw).

Babies and yoing toddlers really need a consistent, one-to-one relationship.

It might be worth arranging to see the nursery manager and telling her/him how you feel. But if your gut is telling you the staff don't seem very caring, I would find another nursery.

There are always those nursery naysayers, but I found nursery a much nicer environment than any of our local childminders, who seemed to be either staying indoors a lot and not getting up to much, or dragging a gaggle of kids around from pillar to post. Just my opinion. You'll get lots of different ones! Really important, though, that YOU feel happy about your child's care.

I would definitely raise it with the manager. When ds first started at nursery his keyworker welcomed him and handed him back, filled me in about his day etc. Once ds was more established I would hand him over to any of the 3 staff in his room, but his keyworker was always the most interested/involved.

I also work in a nursery, and as a keyworker take a particular interest in my key children and get to know their families. I try to be around for all handovers, be the one that discusses problems/issues, explain any accident forms etc. But we do work as a team and all staff members care for, feed, change, play with all children.

I do think this is a serious problem with the keyworker and most definitely not with nurseries per se. My boy has absolutely blossomed from his time at nursery and is happy and confident with lots of friends. I do not think a CM would have been right for him, so please do look at all options. If you are happy with the nursery, are there other staff you feel are particularly engaged? Are there other nurseries in your area? On some issues I wish I had been more vocal, and this can absolutely be done in a positive way, I will ask as many questions as I like when my 2nd starts. You must say what concerns you and get a good result.

I think you need to address this issue with the nursery. In the nursery where I work, we don't use the term key-worker, we use the term key-person, as it is more than just a job title. We have a system where each key-person is responsible for settling their children in, especially important with babies. The key-person is responsible for changing their nappies and ensuring they are happy and settled all day. They also have responsibility for speaking to the parents at drop-off and pick-up and should be making a point of welcoming you both in every morning and waving you off each afternoon. We, do work as team, though, and I can step in for my co-workers if they are off or are already speaking to a parent. Being a key-person is all about building a bond with the child and their family-it's crucial in establishing and maintaning relationships.
Speak to the manager and maybe ask to change to a different key-person.

I agree with what others have said. I started my DC 1 in a nursery when he was one. It was a lovely environment with a great variety of age appropriate activities but drop off time was horribly stressful, v similar to how you describe. I moved my DC to a childminder and it was much better leaving him with the same adult every day.

our nursery operates a ley person system, but they will only be there at either drop off or collection. those that are saying their key person is there for both, do the staff work 12 hour shifts then?

DS' nursery has a key worker system, but they do work as a team, so in the morning one nursery nurse is responsible for welcoming in each baby and taking messages from parents etc. They also all take responsibility for acknowledging when a parent arrives for pick-up, especially if that child's key worker is changing a nappy or similar, so parents aren't hanging around waiting for their child.

When DS was in the baby room, I know that he really liked all of the nursery staff and although I knew who his key worker was and that he filled in all the paper work, I didn't have much more to do with him than the rest of the staff. In the toddler room, again, I didn't talk to his key worker any more than the others, although again she did the paperwork and the organised acitivites with him. Now he is in the infant room his key worker is always the one who greets me on pick-up (if she's in) and talk about his day, does the activities with him and usually sits with him during meals (although they get a choice where to sit for some meals). I definitely feel that I can discuss anything with the whole team, but I know that any discussion I have with someone else gets recorded for her so that she has the whole picture.

One thing I would say is that I never really got on well with his key worker in the toddler room (he was 1-2yrs old) - she seemed quiet and slightly miserable whenever I picked him up! However, very early on I went in during the day for a special Easter Bonnet Parade and he insisted on walking with her (rather than a different worker) and when I saw them together he clearly adored her and she was clearly much better interacting with children than adults!

Sorry this is so long! I think stabiliser15 is right about basing your next move on their response to your concerns.

For what it's worth, I found nursery much better than the childminders I looked at.

dribbleface, does your baby do 12 hour shifts then?
Our nursery is open 8-5.30. I work 8.30-5.30- that's only 30 mins when I am not there. It's very unlikely that all my key children will arrive before me.

I'm there for all my key children's drop offs and pick ups as I work part time and all my children do short sessions.

Full time staff do either 8am-4pm/9am-5pm/10am-6pm on a rotational basis, 1 week on each shift. Depending on what hours their children do, sometimes they aren't there for both drop off and pick up, just one or the other. If a child does 8am-6pm then there's a good chance they won't see their key worker at drop off or pick up at all one week in three.

oh no, sorry should have explained I'm run a nursery. my staff do 7.30-4.30, 8.30-5.30 or 9-6, most of our children are in before 8 and there till at least 5.30. so parents only see the key person on one end of the day. (middle shift staff are not keypeople).

DD's nursery has 4 staff in her baby room (plus a few from other rooms helping out during holidays) so she is close to all of the staff in her room. At drop off and pick up the two baby rooms are in together so there are more staff around. DD is familiar with all of them and I generally give her to whoever doesn't have their hands full as DD's key worker might be feeding another child breakfast or changing a nappy. If her key worker is there in the evening then she does make a point of handing DD back, but her shifts mean that she is there about 50% of the time as there are generally only 2 members of staff from her room there at the time I get her. DD's day chart is filled in by whoever has given her lunch or change her nappy. So it often has a few different sets of handwriting on it. The main admin that her key worker does is filling in her observations folder, setting targets for her and seeing us at parents evening. She does seem to have a special bond with her key worker, but it must come from her interactions during the day as it isn't obvious at pick up and drop off.

My son has a key worker but has formed attachments to several workers at the nursery which is ideal given that his key worker is on holiday for 2 weeks.

I thihnk it takes time for a child to get used to different people but they can form attachments with several people. In this case maybe you should talk to the nursery manager about the key worker's lack of interest as she doesn't sound ideal.

I am glad that there are several people my DS will now go to quite happily and most nurseries do seem to allocate a key-worker but then all muck in together.

Perhaps as your ds is only doing 2 days it is taking him longer to settle in?

In the nursery I use, it is the rom supervisor who does the majority of handovers, but DD's key worker who does the activities and nappy changes/helping with meals etc with her. I know this because DD is now 2 and constantly tells me about what