ick i just wrote a really long post and it was lost
Ok,
What you could say to the nursery is that you are concerned that your daughter has picked up some bad language from somewhere and that you would like the nursery to work with you to getting your daughter to stop.
I assume since you have spoken to your daughter about it, you could ask the nursery what there policy is, if that is enough for you great, if you would like them to follow your lead even better, i am sure they will. They could either tell her not to use that language because it is not nice/bad/inappropriate, or ignore it your choice.
Lots of little girls are very bossy, i suspect your dd moving to a different nursery is attempting to find her place, you say she is fine with her old peers, that is probably due to the fact that she already has a secure place in that group. Now when she enters the new nursery and you play situations she is not so sure and is just trying to find her feet.
When often tell our little bossy girls that they need to listen to the other children, that they are not to shout at others, and that other children have feelings to and to think about how they feel when they are told what to do, if that all fails a little time playing separately from each other usually works.
ok going to attempt to post this, if it fails again i have copied it fingers crossed 