Ridiculous nursery rules?

[nickywy]

I send my son to nursery 5 days a week 8am-6pm but my work pattern changes at times, so I spend the morning with him at times, and take him in a bit later if I have a late shift at work etc. Regardless of if I take him in late, or not at all, I still pay for the full 5 days.

Having taken him in around 11am a couple of times, I was asked by the nursery, to inform them if I planned on bringing him in 'late' so that they could be sure they had enough lunch for him. I found that slightly irritating, as I pay for it anyway, he is only 2 years old, so how difficult can it be to just prepare an extra scoop of pasta etc each day? Nonetheless, I did as I was told, to keep things simple.

When I inform them, I tend to email them, as it just takes me 2 seconds to type on my blackberry, and I don't have to wait for someone to answer the phone, explain who I am etc etc. There have been a couple of times where they didn't pass the message onto his room, so the staff there didn't have any lunch for my son, and proceeded to 'announce this' quite loudly until I enquired as to why there would be no lunch if I informed the manager, at which point they quickly shut up and started running around trying to find some food as they 'weren't told'. I again, didn't bother to make a fuss, as luckily my son had eaten a a big late breakfast anyway.

Today I emailed in again, to let them know he was coming in before lunch, and on arrival was told that I need to call them, in addition to emailing them, as they're not always at the desk.

Is it me, or is this just getting ridiculous?? I'm holding back from 'discussing' with them all the above issues, as I really cannot be bothered with kicking up a huge fuss over such trivial things, but when all put together, am I being unreasonable for getting annoyed about all of this?

This is getting ridiculous you are correct.

But from where I'm sitting, on the information you've given, it is you.

Phone them, it takes an extra minute out of your day.

Does he ever not go in for lunch at all? If not or it's rare tell them to always assume he'll be there or you'll let them know if he won't be in.

Could you text instead of email?
This would annoy me too.

i would clarify with them that as you are paying for all 5 days you expect lunch to be prepared for him every day and that way there is no confusion.

In a nursery, the manager is not always at the desk to immediately pick up emails. When the register is taken in the morning, the headcount is done and the numbers of children in the rooms is sent through to the kitchen, and they cook according to the number of children who are there. So, if you turn up at 11am without letting them know, then your child has not had food cooked for them, as it would be taken as read that he is not attending, therefore not requiring a meal. It would be best if you phoned and asked to be put through to his room, then letting the room supervisor know straight away whether he needed a meal or not. You are being a little unreasonable, but only because you weren't aware of how it worked.

Are you happy with this nursery looking after your son? Why can't you let them know the day before? They have lots of children, lots of routines and lots of parents to keep happy. If you know your hours in advance why can't you speak to the nursery staff to let them know your ds will be in late the following day and will need lunch or not?

At my nurseries I bend over backwards to accommodate the childrens and the parents needs, as has been said the day has been paid for, what does it matter to the nursery that you decide to come and go as you please. I would be happy to accommodate children and parents who were not even booked in for the day who suddenly needed us, and I am sure providing meals simply would not be an issue.
For a nursery to be so picky suggests to me that costs are being controlled too heavily, this is at the expense of the care.

Just to clarify your child does not have special diet/allergies etc? Only ask because as a nursery manager i do ask that parents let me know if their child will not be in as its not really fair on the cook to prepare a separate meal that gets wasted, also I gather your not turning up half way through lunch are you? It annoys me to save then waste a dinner.

If neither of the above apply I agree its a bit annoying and unnecessary, we always have enough for second/thirds for the children so quantity would not be an issue.

I am a shift worker and therefore do the same as you (take them in a bit later some mornings/collect them early on others). I've never had a problem.

I usually just say to the room staff the day before "oh, DS will be in around 11 tomorrow/every day next week" and if I forget to do that then I call in the morning to let them know. Surely it's just as quick to call and say "This is Mrs Kitty, X's mum, just to let you know we'll be in late today" as it is to send an email? At least then you know the message has been received. I also prefer to do it this way in case they are planning any little trips out (walk to the park etc) so as not to inconvenience anyone.

I don't understand why it's not fair on the cook to prepare a meal that has been paid for !

I don't understand their problem. If you are paying for the full day, regardless of whether you bring him in for 8 o'clock or 11:55 they should still have a lunch ready for him.

I would just day to them that, because of your work patterns he may be in later on some days but he will always be there for lunch. I can't see that you need to notify them on each day. It should be expected that he'll be there.

If a child has special dietary needs and the cook prepares a meal specially for that child it's not nice if the child doesn't turn up. The cook has wasted their time that they could have used doing something more constructive.
A nursery should have a bit to spare for lunch. If you have the exact amount for the children, what happens if one accidentally knocks theirs on the floor? If they're that tight with food, leave.

I really don't think it would be to mouch bother for you to ring would it? I also think that maybe just maybe they do not want to waste food afterall we are all supposed to be trying to cut down on waste. Or suggest what someone said earlier tell them you will let them know went he won't be in if that is less often, and for them to assume that he will be there for lunch if you don't call.

Thanks for all the replies, glad to find it's not only me who finds it irritating.

My son doesn't have any special dietary requirements. I find they are a bit tight with food, at times if I bring him in towards the 'end' of breakfast (although it's not officially over) there has been times when there is no food left for him and the nursery nurses are running around to the other rooms looking for some toast for him. This happened a couple of times, and after I suggested they should really be providing enough for all the kids who turn up, it was resolved. I don't think it's a big enough issue to create such an upheaval to move to another nursery as I do like the other aspects of the nursery alot.

As for calling in, it easier for me to email in, as we are usually still in bed asleep and I want to carry on with my lie in, which won't work if he gets woken up, but the nursery want me to let them know early in the morning. (p.s yes he's in our bed...I know some people won't agree with this, but it's a separate issue which we are happy with....)

With respect to letting them know a day in advance, sometimes its just not practical if i finish later than i expect (the night before), so i won't know early enough.

I have to agree with some of you above, I still don't understand the big problem with making that extra 'scoop' and I think I'm giving them an easy time by not kicking up a fuss about all of this, especially as I pay for it all anyway.

Auntiemonica - seems you may have got out of the wrong side of the bed. I don't feel I am ridiculous at all, but perhaps you are being unnecessarily rude.

Nicky, he is always there for lunch, isn't he? What time do they serve lunch?

I would quite firmly say that he will be there for lunch unless you tell them otherwise. They are being ridiculous over this!

I bet they put their milk claim in !

Nurseries can claim a third of a pint of milk each day for each child from the government, it amounts to hundreds of pounds, even thousands.

Ask if they have been providing milk.

They serve lunch at 1130 as they find that a lot of the kids fall asleep by 12.
In the past 16 months that he's been there, I've probably taken him in after lunch, about twice.

I didn't know that about the milk claim. They're actually pretty good at providing milk and have a surplus at times. They leave the cartons out at the front desk towards the end of the day for parents take home.

Ok I think I've had my rant and gotten over it. Hopefully that will be that last silly request, otherwise I may have to rant straight at them instead.
Thanks for all your advice!