Considering moving for better work life balance and a smaller mortgage

[LemonsMakelimes]

Interested in hearing whether anyone has moved somewhere completely new for work life balance. We have £300k equity but still a huge £500k mortgage which we have to work full time to pay, because the area is so expensive. If we didn’t have a mortgage we could both work part time, spend more time with the kids, get away from the rat race. But is the grass always greener? Do you ever regret it? Or did you want to move but didn’t and wish you did?! We’re just going round and round in circles 🙈

I don’t think it’s just about the mortgage rate - lifestyle matters too. For you, your biggest factor is time, and you can’t get that back. So long as you research the area, I’d say make the change.

a number of our friends have, and both work pt, enjoy hobbies. They moved closer to their parents too, and happen to be nearer the seaside which makes for a high quality of life.

When DH and I discuss leaving london we always go back to lifestyle factors - london has more to offer us, so we will likely continue to stay here for a while yet

We moved away from Surrey to the NW when the DC were 9, 11, 12 & 17. After a decade I’m the only one with regrets due to missing friends!

Consider age/stage you are at in terms of medium to long term planning.

We have a large and valuable property at 70% equity. We are very focussed on paying the last chunk off to retire.

Balancing the above against sensible tax efficiency savings for retirement and supporting two children one still to go to university.

My overall point is your financial priorities may change when you desire to retire or go part time then the large mortgage and underused living space becomes a burden when trying to pay it off and save

id recommend looking at your overall financial position an what you would like to do in 10years time and beyond

lifestyle factors are obvious an have been commented on but there is a relationship between reduced financial pressure often frees up time - reduced hours and early retirement- not relying on state pension

We have a paid-off house worth around £400k. We could sell it, get a mortgage, and move somewhere lovely in a posh area. But honestly? I love our life just as it is! Not worrying about a mortgage or losing a job is priceless.

Because of this, I can work part-time, spend time with family, garden, and really enjoy life. People say your lifestyle will “go down” if you don’t chase a bigger house or more money: but for me, it’s gone up. I have time to grow my own fruit and vegetables, cook everything from scratch, and it’s crazy how much money you save when you’re not running around buying overpriced coffee and lunch.

It’s definitely worth it. On your deathbed, you won’t think, “I wish I had a nicer home with a bigger mortgage,” or “I wish I worked more.” You’ll think: “I wish I had spent more time with my loved ones.”

If you can do it, do it!

The lifestyle elements are tricky. On the one hand there is that obvious bonus of time that you can never get back. I have a potentially life limiting condition (not likely to make me very ill in the near future but a nice long relaxing retirement is very much a big question mark due to my health. So I don’t want to live to work, I want to live to spend time with my kids and family.

We currently live in a fairly dull commuter town while DH and I both grew up semi-rurally. I don’t want to live out in the sticks but somewhere not on the M4 corridor would be really nice. I’d like to be able to go walking every day ideally from my front door. However partly due to health concerns and partly for DC who will be teenagers in the blink of an eye, we don’t want to be miles from anywhere.

I’m also concerned that DH would end up with a longer commute and we are currently very lucky that although we WFH some days, our commutes are only around 20-30 mins (although more like 40 mins with childcare drop offs) which could be a lot worse. Basically I don’t want to romanticise some other life in a “grass is greener” type way when actually, we really don’t have it that bad at the moment. I just can’t help wanting something different.

Another relevant factor is that at least one of our DC is ND (others may be too but possibly too young to tell still) and although highly academic, struggles with the social and environmental demands of school. I’d like to have the option to home educate which we couldn’t do if working long hours. I’d rather that be a considered decision rather than something we end up eventually doing after DC reaches some crisis point and cannot cope in school any longer.

Thank you this is good advice although to be honest I wouldn’t even really know where to start. We pay into work pensions and that’s about it. We don’t really have a plan… I guess this is me trying to make one?!

This is the life I want! Part-time job doing meaningful work. No corporate bullshit. A nice little house in a beautiful area, I don’t want a mansion or a landscaped lawn or the latest kitchen. I want to grow my own tomatoes and let my kids help me cook.

I worry maybe I’m being unrealistic but then I think well what is there to stop us?

Exactly! It’s not unrealistic at all.

It’s also a dream life for the kids. I have two little ones (4 years and 20 months), and we bake, garden, and feed the chickens together: they absolutely love it.

We also have a small house that we rent out—so someone else is essentially paying the mortgage for that property. This way, we’re building wealth over time while still enjoying a paid-off home with zero stress. And if anything goes wrong, we can always sell the rental.

I really feel like I have the best of both worlds: financial security, a debt-free home, and the freedom to enjoy life.

How old are you and how old are the children?

I fantasise about doing this all of the time also, similar equity, slightly bigger mortgage. My children are pre schoolers and we are late 30s/early 40s. However currently I think we have decided to maximise what we can earn now, overpay the mortgage, and re-evaluate in a couple
of years. Basically we want to get ourselves sin a better financial position so we can give our children all of the opportunities we can, before we make career decisions that could prove impossible to reverse after time out doing different jobs. But same as you, I’d love to be growing food, cooking, spending time at home with family without rushing and juggling and logging back in after bedtimes.

I did it. Sold a gorgeous old house with a huge garden and privacy that was idyllic and bought a smaller house in a lovely city.

Work part time. Hubby works part time. The dream was a lot more holidays and no financial pressure. As it’s worked out hubby’s work dropped a lot and COL hiked prices up so we aren’t nearly as well off as we’d dreamed!

That said ….. we have no mortgage and we work part time. If we’d stayed put our mortgage would have increased hugely (we were on a 1.49 rate) We’d also have just been hit by the huge oil prices.

Some things aren’t as good - lack of privacy, parking on an estate rather than on our huge drive, our new home doesn’t have as much space or character. BUT we are more central. The kids can walk to shops and meet friends. Our house costs and house maintenance costs are way lower. We’ve made new friends and still see old friends.

I’ve never regretted the decision to move to a better quality of life.

We sound in similar situations. We are just about to turn 40 and kids are 7, 5 and 2. I kept thinking the same thing about finances and we were going to reevaluate in a couple of years. But I already feel like I’ve missed my eldests’ proper “childhood” years and the same will be true of my 5 yo in a couple of years, they’ll be junior school age, and my youngest will also be at school. We started this conversation before our middle one was born so we’ve been debating for 5 years already!

We can’t afford private school so beyond that I’m not really sure what opportunities we would be continuing to provide them by working more. If we were mortgage free then in theory the finances could balance out so although we’d earn less, our outgoings would be over 2k less per month plus we’d hope to drop to one car between us. So hopefully we’d still be able to do things like save a bit for the kids future.

@LemonsMakelimesits so hard to make the step into the unknown isn’t it! It sounds like you’ve been thinking about it for longer than us, and maybe you could put in place mini deadlines to explore it more, like going to check out areas and looking what houses are for sale, what jobs are in those areas etc (if you haven’t already), and getting some agents to price your house. I know what you mean, without deadlines it’s feels like it’s so easy to drift along when everything is so busy, and then next thing it’s another two years!

I sometimes do various bits of this list but then worry I’m getting ahead of myself. Also, it’s really me who is yearning for change, my DH is a creature of habit and would quite happily stick to his daily routine every day for the next 30 years and doesn’t seem fussed about a mortgage. Although he does say he’d like more time with the kids, I know that if we were to move it would be mainly me driving it.

Moving from a 800k house to a 300k one is drastic, is there a middle ground?

If you want something different and life is short, go for it!

Yes but perhaps not round here. Theres several places where £450k would get you a very nice place of a decent size whereas £300k is more tricky and you’re much more limited on areas (some nice houses but often far from jobs etc). A £150k mortgage would be a lot better than a £500k one!