Homelessness

[Bubbzie]

Hi this is my 1st time on here so don't no if I'm doing this right lol. I'm wanting advice/help etc as I'm currently homeless & my 2 teenage daughters have had to go & live with their grandparents. I haven't not got the financal resources or any family support of any kind to be able to secure accommodation & the area I live has no hostels or emergency accommodation & the council are useless, they want to put me into a homeless hostel over 50miles away & takes over 2 hours on public transport to get from there to the area I'm from & where my children live & it costs over £42 in travel costs which I can't afford. I can't take much more I've tried everything & everyone I can think is of for help (including several emails & a phone call to our now old prime minister) So please if you no of anything or anyone that can help me please contact me. Thanks for taking the time to read Claire x

This is good advice.

@Queenxxx I understand your logic, but is being put into emergency housing the best approach for her children? Surely they’re safer and more comfortable living with their grandparents? My understanding is that emergency accommodation is pretty grim.

Personally I think that the OP needs to accept that she had to live apart from them until she can sort out new accommodation. Her children are teenagers so they’ll understand that she’s doing what’s best for them in the long term.

Hey. Of course I don't know op or her children but as a mother myself I wouldn't be able to stay away from my kids and neither would they. I think staying in emergency accommodation but together is far better than staying away from each other and in someone else's house where they'll be having not a lot of privacy/be as comfortable as they would in their own space. Also, trust me emergency accommodation isn't that bad. I know the housing/homeless help is very low right now but emergency accommodation is way better than staying at someone else's house. They will accommodate to each of their needs ie beds ect, they'll have a lot more privacy and space, and most of all they'll be with their mother.

Fair enough, @Queenxxx . Personally I’d probably leave my teenagers with their grandparents as long as they’re welcome there and being looked after.

You have to face reality. Your children are safe with grandparents.

If there is nothing in your area you have to move 50 miles away. Perhaps grandparents can help by taking your children to meet you at weekends?

If they can't then you're going to have to have a long distance relationship with your girls and communicate by handwritten letter etc just as parents did when children were sent away during the blitz.

You need to concentrate on getting your life together. A home and a job.

Are your family in a position to lend you money to privately rent? Once you move in and your kids are back with you, UC will help with rent.

I'm really sorry to read that you are in this position @Bubbzie
People often don't understand the spiral that goes with homelessness. I am pleased that your children are safe but it must be so hard to be apart from them.
It's very difficult to find any support as an adult, and physical and mental difficulties make it nigh on impossible.
You mentioned emergency housing 59 miles away? I understand that it feels impossibly far from your children but hear me out.

In my experience you need to engage with what they are offering, however terrible the temporary housing is. It is only temporary- a place to keep you from the street while something suitable is put in place. Do you have a housing welfare officer? They need to know about your health concerns and how being fsr from your children impacts your mental health. You need to let them get to know you. Hidden homelessness is as valid as rough sleeping ( hidden homeless are those like you who are staying with friends/sofa surfing etc) but the councils are fire fighting and prioritise those living on the streets. You need to be verified as homeless so ask the council how it can be done
They won't want you in the emergency accommodation for long but it's wise to take up whatever they offer and be willing to jump through the hoops necessary to be properly housed.
Do you have a GP to support you and do you have someone to help you apply for any more benefits that you might be entitled to? The salvation army are extremely good for this so I will drop a link for the one in your area. They know all the tips and wrinkles regarding getting help
I wish you all the best!

https://www.salvationarmy.org.uk/homelessness

yasminandtheredrose

Well let's be honest.... a lot of the housing situation is due to the amount of immigrants in this country“

BS. It isn’t. It’s because the government of the past 14 years completely abrogated its responsibility in respect of social housing.

It started with Thatcher’s right to buy and no government has made any serious attempts to reverse the damage to society.

I hope this government will. We’ll see.

Exactly this is what I am trying to say!

How are you doing today @Bubbzie?

Hi rain sorry it's took so long getting back to you but I don't have any family as my dad had a massive bleed on his brain, brain damaged, paralysed, is like a child now & had to have full time care & he was all I had thank you though for thinking of me x

Hi fortnite sorry its took so long to reply, but after putting my post on the other night & having to explain/defend myself against someone who thinks everybody in my situation are all benefit bums & have only ourselves to blame fof the situation im in i wasnt going to come back on here. But thanks for the advice it's really hard to explain everything in messages when it comes to my situation, what I have & haven't tried to get help etc but I appreciate the kindness it means a lot especially as I have no family etc to turn to for support. I didn't realise how bitter, cruel & sad some people are till recently. But just want to say thank u for your help & kind words it's ment more than u no xx

This, definitely.

You need to accept the 50 miles away homeless hostel, even if that means leaving your job and children changing school.

If you've turned it down though, you're probably screwed. It's usually a one time offer for emergency accommodation and if you turn it down then the council don't have to do anything more to help you. You've got nothing to lose by contacting them again and saying you've changed your mind, you never know it might work.

Other than that you're on your own. You'd have to look at what you can afford to rent. A room for yourself and children continue living with grandparents? Another part of UK where rents are cheaper?

Options are limited when you're homeless. You have to do whatever you have to do. Otherwise you'll be living on the streets if nobody can take you in.

Ignore the haters bubsie you need a thick skin to hang around here! Don't bother wasting time defending yourself to those who don't want to listen.

Thank you for your message @Bubbzie Thinking of you. Getting help for homelessness feels like dead end after dead end doesn't it?
Posters so often think it's as simple as: get a job and rent a flat. Round here one person on minimum wage has no chance, and that's before having other hurdles in the way.

Thank you for the lovely reply. That is tough. Try to cope with the temp accommodation with your children. Explain to them that it's a necessary evil on the pathway to permanent housing.

I no Fortnite they refuse to admit we have a homeless problem at all round here & our local MP is Rishi Sunak (so how blessed am I?) he's useless & oh yea I've sent several emails to him & had 2 phone calls off him then basically tells me he will contact the council & see what is available to me? (Well should he not already no what's available in his constituency?) Then I got an email 3 weeks later basically telling me to get in touch with salvation army & social services, so what a complete waste of time & utter joke that he is! I just feel every where I turn I get the door shut in my face. Most charities won't help cos u need refering by a professional ie social worker/ key worker or I'm not eligible for other reasons & that annoys me cos I think to myself people give money to these charities to help homeless people I'm homeless & asking for help how more eligible can I be? & Like my kids staying with my ex's parents so I'm now not classed as an emergency WTF??? So basically to get anything or any help u have to lie? & That's bulls###. I don't have any family members or family support I keep myself to myself so just being able to talk to someone like u who understands where I'm coming from & who isn't immediately tarring me & judging me with being a lazy, benefit bum because Im currently not working makes a big change. I feel like I'm having to explain myself all the time. So thanks for giving me your time means a lot xx