Hi there,
So I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced these feelings...
I have been married for almost 2 years now and we have my husbands' son stay with us every other weekend, all very happy and no issues at all. My husband and I have been through some crap over last few years, family fallouts/ family bereavements/ financial loss which has left me with awful anxiety. I’m almost constantly on edge, at home, in public and I’ve lost a lot of confidence and doubt myself and my abilities all the time. I’m always overthinking and over worrying about everything! It can be really frustrating with things like cooking and cleaning, I’m frightened I wont do something right and make someone or myself sick, when I’m more than capable and know that I’ve done everything right.
Anyway, I would love to try for a baby soon and I know that I can’t do this with the way I am feeling. I have always wanted to have children and my Step Son is brilliant and would be pleased to have another brother or sister (his Mum has an almost 3 year old with her now husband) and we have already put plans to start back by months as I still don’t feel TOTALLY ready. But this over thinking is the only thing holding me back, my SIL has just had her second child and I just look at him desperate to have a child of our own. I just don’t know how to make things better and build up my confidence. I have tried cognitive behaviour therapy, group therapy on controlling worry and just couldn’t get along with them. My Partner has suggested cooking together so that I can pick up easy habits, I know I can be exhausting to be around and constantly asking questions to make sure everything is okay.
I hope I don’t come across as crazy as I feel ☹ Maybe I need to try therapy again but any suggestions/ advice from anyone would be great, thanks.