Does anyone else feel really lonely?

[mummysarah2707]

We have little ones running around and demanding our attention constantly but does anyone feel really alone?

Hi OP, are you a SAHM? It can be really lonely especially if you’re not getting much adult interaction.

I did when I was a stay at home mum. I felt like crying all the time! Not so much now I work and my son is older (9) and good company.

.waves.
Me

Yes.

I do. Currently on mat leave with 8m DD (also have DS4) and I’m incredibly lonely. Totally sucks.

Yeah a lot of the time. It’s strange 95% of my time I have an 11mo in tow and we’re always busy but I do feel lonely. Which I hate to admit in rl.

I’m looking forward to going back to work part time but I don’t miss boring full time work either and love spending time with the little one. It’s difficult because in one way I love being off and I’m trying to appreciate it but I also miss the feeling where you get home from work and miss being home.

I want to miss being home again if that makes sense...

Yes, that's why I'm on MN all the time! Miss my DH, we never talk or relax together as he's working all the time to support us. Friends IRL have their own families and childcare issues so meeting up is very rare.

I think when you have children it takes so long to get used to being a mum, it's a totally life changing experience and I think the loneliness is almost like a mourning for who you once was. It's not necessary a bad thing, just life moving in to the next level.

@OhHolyJesus you and me both. Long days isn’t it...

My dd is 29 months old now - I work part time (30 hours) and my partner works 50-60 hrs per week because we need the money. We dont get much time together and although we live together we work opposite days to try to save on childcare etc so I find myself on my own at home while he's working and I'm lonelier now than I was on maternity leave as most of my friends are back at work full time and seem to have never ending budgets for expensive get togethers with the kids that we just can't afford - what's wrong with a play date at home?

I've started going to my local children's centre, it's free and I've met some nice people.

I think the key is to try to get out daily even if it's a walk to the park x

It’s taken me 12 months maternity leave and I’m finally getting used to my new life and realising there’s many phases. There’s always part time work out there. I only have one to put in child care so would break even and it’ll be worth it for my sanity.

Have you downloaded the MUSH app to meet other mums in your areas? Go to baby groups... there are loads of low cost groups! Maternity leave is the most boring thing ever but it really doesn't have to be... being a SAHM is an amazing thing, I personally couldn't do it but I am enjoying my time off thanks to meeting some nice mums and babies :)

Yes I’m a SAHM, I struggle with anxiety though and maybe it’s just my local area that is like this particularly but it’s very clicky and being a strange is very hard to be accepted. Xx

I too for bed baby groups clicky, I think it's just the feeling you get at them. Persevere op, I found a very good friend at a baby/toddler group!

I too found. Sorry about typo.

Yes :(

I have an activity for each day of the week to ensure my daughter and i go out every week day. She is only 5 months but I go out for my own sanity. I find some of the groups very clicky, but the majority are full of mums and dads in the same position as me, so you just need to say hello and hope for the best!
Now its the Easter holidays all of the baby groups I go to are not running and I am really struggling. Last week dragged and the loneliness really set in. I didn't realise how much I needed my daily groups to feel occupied and sane!

Alone, yes I know that feeling well. Things are a bit easier since I went back to work part time after mat leave with DS. These days I feel alone mainly because DH and I live miles from any family support and though I love my boy to bits, it feels like a relentless round of work and childcare, and no real time with DH (who works FT).

@mummy I’m sorry you’re feeling lonely. I know it’s hard. We’ve just moved house, area and have new jobs so I know what you mean. The place I have moved to is a little town and everyone seems to know each other maybe we can hand hold each other through it

It can be horribly lonely being a SAHM. I remember being pregnant with two boys under 3 and turning up to a playgroup that I hardly ever went to because I just had to get out of the house to see another adult. I turned up and almost immediately burst into tears, too many hormones. People asked if I was okay but they didn't know me and it was just a bit weird. I then found another playgroup that was at a good time for naps and I made it almost every week for three years, it was an oasis of adult company! Sometimes though, even meeting old friends can be lonely as you are constantly pulled away from any conversation you start. The thing about playgroups is that often everyone feels lonely and isolated, which not a great conversation starter. Find a playgroup that has friendly helpers that come and talk to you. One thing that really helped me was just being out of the house talking to random strangers in the park or at the supermarket. Plan a reason to get out every day, try to be sociable to everybody you meet and choose some activities to do every week so that you get to know the people. It's hard though.