I've just had my third child after a big age gap being my youngest is now 13 I got taken in on Monday as my baby heart rate was really erratic I kept telling them something was wrong cut a long story short he ended up pooping inside and we were rushed down for an emergency c section it was all so traumatic I didn't see him for first hour as he was so poorly I lost a litre of blood and they couldn't get my intestines to go back in we're ok now but the trauma of it all has really destroyed me I feel very anxious and scared still and not sure how to feel now just wanna get on and enjoy being a mum but can't stop thinking wat if