I have my very own pet abusive ex. We have been divorced years and I am remarried but he's still dominating my life. My 13 year old lives with him or should I say lives past tense. We went to court today as he's been swearing and shouting and loads of other behaviours towards my 13 year old. She has asked for shared care and my ex has been forced into agreeing with this today as he was trying to demonstrate he was a rationale normal person ....I felt like an extra in la la land. The judge has quite clearly said that cos she is 13 she can choose and we were directed to work together and organise contact over the next 5bweeka as the court wants to investigate the allegations raised.she is to stay with me until that point. So why I'm pulling my hair out is he will not cooperate ...I didn't expect harmony however he's immediately started being a g!t again. I have sent 10 messages and 2 emails to sort this out and am recording everything. He tries to use my daughter to organise stuff which I am defang to do am I wrong??? I will not discuss finance with him through our daughter and we have a lot to sort out. He literally sends me batty and I'm sure he's wanting me to call and blow my top which he can then record I'm not falling for his games. My daughter is fully aware of the games he's playing and doesn't want to see him if he continues however I'm worried cos the judge was quite clear ... help