ADHD screen time addiction as a single parent with 2 children advice

[unpredictablemum]

Hi, looking for advice and not to be shamed. I want to be better but I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and I know I will get either experienced helpful advice or be shamed for not being good enough….
im a single parent for 2 years (after 17 yr relationship), I have now an ADHD 8 year old boy and a probably ADHD 2 year old girl. I also have ADHD. We live with my mum in a 2 bed flat, no one has their own space/tools/organisation etc etc which exacerbates all our ADHD symptoms. it’s like musical fricking beds here.
my 8 year old has a screen addiction, I don’t like it but his younger sister has made it difficult due to her constant needy behaviour and my ultimate mental drain. These days I’m so overwhelmed I struggle to do the basics.
i need to tackle my 8 year olds screen addiction but how? If I stop screen time he is very disruptive and extremely aggravating to his over dramatic sister resulting in more time spent calming her down.
i also work 5 days a week between school hours so have no time to organise or prepare activities etc,
do I need to take time off work to have the time to create some organisation and set up tasks and routines and a lot of other things??? How can I organise this shit show without taking time off work?!
let’s not forget I’m ADHD and literally in overwhelm burnout state with the pressure of guilt wanting to do the right things but with no home of our own and limited funds…
why is there no advice for mum’s with ADHD kids that also have ADHD? How am I meant to organise and implement this routine/structure if I can even bloody function and I have no one to put up a god damn shelf or a blackout blind!!!!!
and no I can’t reduce days at work and I’d struggle to find another jobs that fits between school runs.
no one will rent me a god damn house because my wages alone are not enough. So what, I slowly mentally die whilst my kids are left to cope in a shitty environment. Can’t see my son achieving much at this rate even though he’s clever and more than capable…. Rock and a hard place 🤷‍♀️

It honestly sounds like you're in survival mode, not failing. You're trying to parent two young children while managing your own ADHD, working full-time around school hours, and living in a cramped space, anyone would feel overwhelmed.
I'd focus on one small change at a time rather than trying to fix everything. Even reducing screen time by 15–20 minutes a day and replacing it with one simple activity is a start. It might also be worth asking your son's school or local family support services if there are any parenting or ADHD support groups, they can be a great source of practical ideas and reassurance.
Most importantly, be kind to yourself, you don't need to be a perfect parent, just a supported one.