ADHD works off of novelty, urgency, interest, challenge and passion. Your dad shouting at you probably sparked urgency with negative reinforcement.
Without these things initiating tasks can be so difficult, especially if you're being told to do them and your autonomy seems to be taken away from you.
Written communication can be better than being spoken to as it relieves some pressure and there's no tone to it, but then you don't have the urgency factor.
Lists can also become part of the furniture and are not a very good long term solution.
If your issues are mostly at work you may be able to get access to work funding for an ADHD coach, although I'm not up to date with the cuts made to access to work so I can't say for certain it's covered. It used to be. You can also get note taking software, used to be paid for by access to work too, so if someone just riffed off a to do list with loads of unnecessary filler that was disinteresting, I had a back up I could refer back to as it would take notes.
Finding ways to get tasks novel, or challenging could work quite well. I use a digital spinning wheel for non urgent tasks. It's quirky and fun.
For household responsibilities that just never seem to end, I really need a body double. There's no challenge, I get no reward from completing tasks, it isn't novel and I can't rely on urgency as that will leave us all without knickers for the week. It definitely is not interesting. And as soon as someone says are you going to do that, even if I was going to do it, I no longer want to. Scheduling body doubling time helps.
The issue is when the body doubling can't happen because there is nobody available, I continue to be disabled by my disability, and I don't get the things done no matter how often I am asked to do them, and I need a lot of acceptance to understand I am not being lazy. I am genuinely disabled and that deserves grace.