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Neurodiverse Mumsnetters

Use this forum to discuss neurodiverse parenting.

Naughty Chair for not singing along with the class

1 reply

AlwaysInNeedofCoffee · 17/11/2025 21:51

Hey there, so a little bit of relevant details, I'm a neurodivergent mum in the process of my child being referred, she's 4 and in Reception and has sensory issues along with other issues communicating and being able to focus, etc.
So I picked my daughter up from school, she seemed off today not her usual self, a little quieter instead of her usual bright smile and yelling mummy when she sees me at pickup. We go home and after a little opens up and says the teacher shouted at her again - the previous time her being told off in a raised voice in front of me for crying.
I tried to sit her down and talk to her, ask her simple questions about what happened, why the teacher shouted and so on. She couldn't communicate to me and shut down and wasn't able to talk anymore. Luckily I know a few other mums with kids in the same class, and was able to get details that her teacher shouted at her for not singing along with the other children in class. Bare in mind, my daughter can't cope with loud noises, too many voices or conversations going on at once and singing, she doesn't even like me or her father singing most times and gets incredibly distraught. I've mentioned to this with her school before she started the school year, and again when re-addressing the issues to her teachers and once again to the nursing team when said-teachers disregarded previous concerns I had about her welfare.
Not only was she shouted at for not singing, but she was also told she'd be going in the blue chair tomorrow, otherwise known as the naughty chair, which is mostly reserved for children who swear, bully or use physical violence. Am I wrong for thinking this is way out of line considering they were aware of her sensory issues, her referral for autism and sensory needs and also extra concern issues I have raised with them multiple times. Not only that they never informed me as to the existence of this naughty chair or that my child was recieveing punishment for something I think was not naughty behaviour rather a child who needs additional support and is being penalised for not being able to communicate her feelings or need for support in those particular moments and was not distuptive nor harmful to any other student just because she couldnt sing wt thst moment when told to do so. It's also made me worry about what they do with SEN children that have diagnoses and how they are treated, especially if those children are non-verbal and don't have friends like my daughter has, to explain what has been happening behind closed doors at school.
And does anyone else think that, like notifications or signed slips of when children have physical accidents at school they should keep a record as to the use of this naughty chair, the student involved and the reason as to why and informing their parent. They never even mentioned what happened at pickup, nor that they'd be punishing her, despite her additional needs.

OP posts:
jessiejojo · 09/02/2026 11:53

This is completely outrageous and actually a safeguarding issue. Does the school have a written plan in place identifying your daughter's needs and what reasonable adjustments are in place to support her? For example, she could be excused from singing practice/assemblies or use ear defenders. Demand a plan if you do not have one and use it to keep them accountable. You do not need a diagnosis for reasonable adjustments- it is a legal requirement.

People often have no idea what sensory overload is. Send the teacher/school a link (YouTube has some good explanations) to educate them.

Put your concerns in writing and ask who the decision maker is if you are not being listened to- and escalate accordingly to the head teacher/board of governors.

I agree that this experience raises questions as to whether this school will support your daughter or you need to change schools due to their lack of professionalism/adequate duty of care.

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