ND Xmas

[Pusj]

Wondered how everyone else is coping for christmas (good or bad!), I’m so overwhelmed and just hate the day and the change in routine and everything about it, my Christmas dinner has ended up in the bin after a meltdown and I’m just looking forward to tomorrow.

The best thing we ever did was to stop confirming to societal expectations!
No decorations, no fuss, home is the safe space from the craziness around. Food today was 'picky tea' of nuggets, cocktail sausage rolls, pigs in blankets etc.
Do what works for you, you'll feel so much better

I'm.not ND but my 4 year old is amongst many disabilities. He also is recovering from flu. Has left his bedroom for 30 mins the whole day and eaten only carrots and chocolate. 15 year old and his dad (my ex) are being assholes who think I live to serve them. Told them I'm not celebrating xmas next year. Me and 4 year old will just have a normal day and they can fuck off elsewhere. 4 year old has bag of presents he won't even look at. Can tell family pissed off I won't make him open them

I think it’s going to be pizza next year!

I had v v low expectations for today. I’ve 2 ASD boys and 1 NT daughter. One boy is an adult and lives in supported living. He came round we got a takeaway pizza (both boys have food restrictions but will eat pizza), felt bad as my daughter thought I was doing a roast, but after eating my eldest decided he had to go. He couldn’t cope with the youngest one. I just got him a cab back and will see him tomorrow as we’re all going to the cinema. Daughter has gone to her dads, youngest is on his phone and I’m chilling. I went for a run this morning after the youngest had opened his presents as new I’d struggle to get him out today and I go bonkers being stuck in a flat all day.
very lonely day tbh but I’m glad it’s all over with. It’s so hard and some people just don’t get how difficult today can be.

Think im gonna take tree etc down now

I’m with you! Once I’ve chilled out the tree is coming down, possibly permanently idk if I can be bothered going forward in the next years , the only thing I like about it is the twinkly lights and I’m not sure I even like them right now!

Awaiting diagnosis yet I hate the day.Decades I've dreaded it.
I asked DH if we could not bother as he always left the majority to me.
Dcs left home yet he insisted on buying and cooking a dinner that I don't want and causing an atmosphere while doing it.
My newish colleagues have decided I'm weird for not going to staff dogs even though I hate crowds and eating in public.
Glad it's done and boxing day I can do what I want.

We do what suits us, and spread things out over the month.
And we assign work tasks according to abilities, rather than customer, so I cook because I like it, and OH does all the Christmas cards. I do crowded shops, and we all start a list for Father Christmas at the beginning of November, so anyone who hasn’t got a clue can just look at the list for the individual.
We do a big meal when we feel like it, this year it was Christmas Eve. It’s OK to stay in pjs if there isn’t a reason to go out.
So the only way to have a lovely Christmas is to customise it for each person. And revel in the things you like, rather than performing for others.

Mum got me a present despite me repeatedly saying that I don't want anything physical. She can't get over the idea that I'm happier and less stressed when I don't have to worry about what random piece of tat I'm being given.

In this instance it was a yellow scarf with animals on it. Not my thing at all. Thankfully she has the receipt!

I just want to thank you again for this post, I’ve literally screen shotted it on my phone for future years to remind myself That I don’t just have to do what everyone else is doing at Christmas.

christmas tree is down, normality is restored for me and I’m back on my usual schedule but having a lunch of pizza as a treat after the tears of yesterday and I just feel much happier doing what works for me today.

What stresses you about receiving gifts?

(Genuine question)

Not the pp, but I find surprise ones stressful, where I don’t know what it is I’d rather not have one than having to do a surprise one and the expectation that straight after unwrapping it I have to be 😃 face before i can even really process.
hate the unwrapping, the noisiness of it.

my perfect gift is basically no gift, or something I’ve chosen that I know I will be getting so not a surprise and it’s not wrapped up.
sounds so ungrateful when I type it out and after the moment I can appreciate that someone cared enough to buy me something but in my mind at the time it’s basically a jumbled overwhelming mess of my head being like ong what is this, what if I hate it, I didn’t ask for this, I don’t want it,the wrapping paper sounds and feels like hell, oh god I look miserable and they’re looking at me, why are they looking at me, all leading towards a melt down

My teen chooses the main present beforehand and gets it early as this works for them.

The rest we do as and when we can.

https://www.tiktok.com/@8bitidiot/video/7180799523676065067 exemplifies it well.

@HebburnPokemon I'm a minimalist. I loathe 'stuff', especially if it's stuff I then have to pretend to like and be grateful for whilst inwardly panicking and wondering where the hell I'm going to put it in my tiny house 😅

I'd much rather have nothing (or something I've asked for) than a surprise.