Autism assessment-I’m 46

[0psiedasiy]

Hi I have an assessment (for asd) in the next few weeks.
I’m getting nervous.
Several family members have a diagnosis.
i have always felt that some autistic ‘criteria’ applied for me, i did tha NAS training to be a befriended in 2002 and thought ooh that’s me, but i wasn’t like any of the people we befriended (they all needed 24 hour care, some were not continent etc).
In my current role several staff who all have diagnosis’s have said questioned me about when I got my diagnosis etc (it did throw me off-is it really that obvious.)
any hints to get through the next few weeks?

I can totally relate to this, OP - I was diagnosed in my 40s and was also very nervous in the preceding weeks/months. I spent ages doing a (very autistic, ha!) hyper-focussed deep dive into how autism presents in women and it helped me make sense of the things I’d always struggled with. I also kept a list of any questions that came to mind to ask the professionals who assessed me.

I must say I needn’t have been nervous - I found it a very positive, validating experience and it has massively helped me understand how my brain works, what triggers to avoid, what my strengths are, when I need to let myself rest, etc. Be prepared for it to take a little while for the outcome to settle, even if it’s what you were expecting. It did slightly throw me at first but I’ve reached a point now where I feel genuinely proud of my autistic brain. Also give some thought to who you want to disclose any eventual diagnosis to (work, family, friends, etc); I’ve been quite open about mine (hell, I even published an article about it!) but that’s not necessarily everyone’s preference and there’s no right or wrong way to navigate it. Good luck x

I've got my assessment coming up in the next couple of months. It's a strange feeling.

But similarly a (nice) colleague said it was obvious and it makes you wonder what you're doing that's so unusual...

I'm failing at applying for jobs currently and think I'm missing something key.

I also am exhausted.

I actually find applying for jobs and interviews really easy (possibly because it gives me a chance to talk about something I’m really passionate about and once I start I don’t shut up!).

I have had a few colleagues mention it. Both who are NT and ND.

Ooh well done!

I think I've missed my niche so I'm trying to be someone I'm not or apply for different jobs to my experience so it's really hard.

I wish I'd gone into something I was good at first time round as I love talking about the things I actually interested in 😊

And second guessing what they want from their questions and not oversharing and understanding what they're after..... hides.

@Suet99 i have also been researching the same subject. Did you take anyone with you to the assessment?
my DH is coming. I don’t know if it’s good or bad. We have been together over 20 years so he knows me pretty well. I decided against my mum as she’s said a few things that make me think she’s in denial (I’m one of three, the other two have a diagnosis already). When I was little she couldn’t leave me with anyone, my eating was so restricted that I was seen by the dietitian in hospital, none of this had anything to do with autism according to her, also my niece is waiting for a assessment and my mum thinks that her masking in school is a load of rubbish, she’s just naughty at home.

I’m sorry your mother has reacted in an unhelpful way (similar story here). My older sister attended part of my appointment to give the developmental/childhood history side of things, which was ok but in retrospect I wish I’d just brought DH, who is much more supportive. My advice would be to take the person you feel most comfortable with, and if that’s your DH then that’s great - first and foremost the professionals assessing you will want you to feel comfortable and supported.

Also, I was convinced they’d laugh at me for thinking I was autistic because I’ve always been able to mask my traits quite well in public so find it hard to be myself around anyone but very close family and friends, but they basically told me at the end that they were in no doubt I was autistic (then explained why it was so obvious!) It really was a huge relief and they couldn’t have been more affirming and supportive.

Ha, this describes every job interview I’ve ever done… I had one the other week and just went off on a completely irrelevant tangent, met with a row of confused faces. It felt like I was staring down at myself, willing myself to stop talking but I just kept going 😳

Yup that's it exactly. I go fof answering what I think they're asking and it's not what they actually were getting at or wanting to see. I hate the whole process currently (as I'm not getting jobs I'd be good at as I come across wrong)

And yes to the intense reseachifn - especially the women with autism and masking.

But like the job interview I'm scared it will all fall out of my head and I'll sound an idiot.

I keep trying to make lists of examples to share but it's hard to make lists of "abnormal" behaviour when all your own behaviour seems "normal" to you...