I crave time on my own with nothing to do, then when it comes I doom scroll and feel shit about myself...

[GeckoFeet]

...so what can I do?

Anyone else feeling like that?

When I look at my diary I look forward so much to a free evening with nothing to do but then when it gets to it I hate it. Why is that?

I generally only have 2 evenings a week with nothing to do and I always feel like I want more but when I'm actually in it I just end up doom scrolling. So what is it that I'm looking forward to?

I need structure and routine to keep busy otherwise I would do nothing and feel bad but I really want to relax but I don't know how.

It's like I can only be busy and frazzled or do nothing and feel shit.

What is it like for you? Have you over come this? What am I missing?

Thanks

I’m making a concerted effort to get back into reading which is how I’d have spent a quiet evening 20 years ago.

I’ve had to really work at it. The urge to pick up and doom scroll is ridiculously strong. When I started, I was forcing myself to read paragraphs, and now I read for 30 minutes.

I’m really paying attention to the urge to scroll and I’ve noticed that, among other triggers, the slightest anxiety has me reaching for the phone.

I’m considering getting a time lock padlock and a strong box!

I do find, as an adhder that I need to be doing something to relax - either physically or mentally.

Depends what you enjoy doing! Reading, as above, is a good suggestion. Watching a movie/TV episode, playing a computer/console game, playing a 1 player board game, doing a jigsaw puzzle? Crafting? It might help to have a plan and be looking forward to a specific activity so as not to get caught up in doom scrolling (so easy to do though!) Hope you can find your happy place 😊

Totally understand what you mean, OP. I think a large part of it for me is genuine tiredness. On the other hand, there was one evening a week ago when I did some crafting and not only did I enjoy it, I felt less tired. Unfortunately I’ still doom scrolling….

Plan a specific activity that is relaxing, like a bath or a film?

I'm the same! I like alone time but i very quickly fall into destructive habits. I have to keep my alone time busy and structured or my anxiety and depression kick up badly.