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Use this forum to discuss neurodiverse parenting.

I need to find a way

0 replies

Ijustdontunderstandthis · 03/09/2023 08:38

I am really struggling right now to find a way forward and I wonder whether anyone can help me figure it out. I am 55, I'm autistic, and I have been suffering from a head injury and then from Long Covid for the past 5 years. My husband left me two years ago and although we are still close (we have three neurodiverse kids together, now 19, 18 and 13) and we have been raising them together) I feel very alone. I'm normally someone who takes charge but now I feel paralysed. I can't work - headaches and fatigue are making it impossible - and am spending too much time in my own head. In the past few days I've realised that I don't know how to fall out of love. My husband has, he no longer loves me which is why he left. I never had a proper relationship before him and I gave everything for our relationship and I just cannot move on from that. I guess I am as literal as they come, when I said yes in church I meant it and it was meant forever, even though I knew it was going to be difficult. I tried so hard and in the past 2 years I thought I had come to terms with it but now I feel like I'm trapped. I am not sure that any of this makes sense but I just don't know what to do.

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