ADHD mothers and planning/cooking for your family

[ADHDmamachef]

Quick bit of market research here. I was diagnosed with ADHD aged 48 which clarified a lot of things for me. Despite being a trained chef I was really crushed/stressed/drained of energy by the never ending routine of producing meals for my family. Are any other ADHD mothers having a similar experience? I want to create an online course - probably taught live - to create a solution for mothers in this situation. I have some ideas of how I might do this but I’d love to hear your blocks/issues around feeding your family/what you want/would be game changing for you. Any thoughts/ideas/rants welcome. I really want to know how you feel and how you think an online cooking course could/would solve this for you.

Interested to see what other replies you got.

I'm not chef level but I am a competent cook and I do like trying new recipes.

But I get totally overwhelmed when child and or partner are in the kitchen at the same time, they take all my concentration away from cooking.

I cannot for the life of me cook pasta without it boiling over. At the weekend I did pancakes and had just poured fresh batter into the pan, nipped upstairs to take partner a cuppa. Would have been fine if I didn't forget that I'd got a pancake on the go 😂.

I struggle to purchase all the required ingredients for a week's worth of dinners in our weekly shop. I either misread the ingredients, size, or forgot important parts.

I don't know if my issues could be solved with a course.

The problem is that all the issues stack.

So my kitchen is a disaster and nobody has any plates/pans/etc available. Nobody has emptied the dishwasher, so I can't even wash the stuff that we have. There are maintenance issues in the kitchen so there is no hot water supply there and no hand wash liquid, so can't hand wash dishes.

Don't have the mental energy or "spoons" to wash dishes before preparing dinner anyway.

We probably forgot to go shopping and nothing healthy is in the fridge. Or I forgot to take that thing out of the freezer to defrost.

Medication is wearing off just at dinner time and I'm rebounding which makes everything even harder.

The kids are whining and that's causing sensory overload. The kids may have sensory issues themselves around food or food sensitivities.

I forgot it was dinner time until the kids are going crazy so I need to get something on the table for them in preferably under 5 minutes. It needs to be something palatable for them, otherwise they will refuse it, because they are now overtired and hungry.

It doesn't matter what I've read in a book or learned on a course, because that was a totally different situation/environment, and learning skills with ADHD does not transfer to a new environment and routine, they need to be developed or learned IN the environment where they will be used.

Many, many, many ADHD families have very chaotic surroundings with multiple issues. And they need something which can be right there at the point of performance - an online course is great but totally useless.

Ideas on cooking multiple meals for fussy eaters? Something better than rice plus freezer chicken nuggets for one and stir fry for another that I come up with.

Not sure I want a course. A book/pamphlet might do it.

I want 15 x one pan recipes each of which involves tipping no more than 5 wholesome, cheap and ready prepped ingredients (fresh/frozen) into a pan, and which, with no more than a bit of stirring, produce tasty health fare.

I don't have much head space/time/money.

I can't do another course on top of all this chaos. But YEA dinner time is the worst time ever for me everyday.

Just dinner done for me, healthy but I don't have to make it or think. Just heat it up would be dream come true.

Not a recipe box - they are no help you still gotta assemble the damn thing.
Not frozen ready meals full of crap or dull choices
But dinner magically there.

Do you have any tricks for that?

The thought of family meals is very overwhelming for me so I would love this. I have boys who eat different things with one v fussy eater so it’s also not very rewarding making the effort to cook. But my mind sort of goes blank when I have to cook.

My problems with this were a big part of why I sought a diagnosis.

I know all about nutrition, all about meal planning, shopping, storing and cooking techniques. I’m perfectly capable of planning and producing a dinner with multiple elements all served hot at the same time. I know all the things…but doing it is another matter. Some days I can’t manage to stick frozen peas in the microwave to put something green on their plates. Or I’ll have bought all the good stuff, and made the plan, but I cannot bring myself to cook or eat it.

How do you overcome those blocks?? (If you know how op I’d do your course)

The "Roasting Tin" series of cookbooks by Rukmini Iyer are genuinely brilliant for this.

I need to get them out again. I'm on a bit of a mission to change our staple diet of air fried beige food and rotating spaghetti bolognese, curry, chilli and pesto pasta forever 🙄 and I need easy quick ideas to be a default replacement.

I really really struggle with cooking/ following recipes.

I find following things with lots of photos useful with clear explanations.
So instead of put butter in I find it better if it says put the 175g of butter into the bowl. I know it sounds silly but that way I don't need to go back and check I have the right amount of butter.
Also I need simple family recipes that I know a large family will eat.
Also when it says Sauté, marinade etc
I need exact timings and explanations.

I don't cook. DH does it.

I wouldn't have any interest in something designed to help 'mothers' cook. Perhaps if you rethought it and it was aimed at all it might be easier to take, but the idea 'mothers' must be helped here becsue it's their sole responsibility to feed their family leaves a bad taste in my mouth.