How do you feel about presents?

[Andsoforth]

I like giving gifts but always feel weird receiving them.

If I were to try and describe it, I’d say that when I get a gift there’s an uncomfortable sense that this gift shows something about how the other person sees me.

Now that I’ve learned to recognise my masking, it makes more sense to me why I find it vaguely threatening, and unsettling.

Of course, as a life long, accomplished masker, I don’t actually show any of this but if I could disappear on birthdays and Christmas, I probably would.

I love to give presents and will always find a reason to give my friends a present if I see something they would like 🙂
Getting presents I find quite stressful but less so if they are unwrapped and just given to me if that makes sense. Getting a wrapped present 🎁 is quite stressful I have poor dexterity so I not find it easy then the wondering what it is and oh no what if not like it etc. i basically hate any surprises I am a bit of a rubbish friend in that respect

I hate gifts. More stuff to fill my house and get in my way, and make it more difficult to find the stuff I actually need, which I already struggle to find. And it’s never stuff I want, because people don’t know me well enough, so they buy random crap and it’s just an extra job for me to dispose of it. You haven’t given me a chess set, you’ve given me the inconvenience of selling it on EBay for less than you paid.

I didn't enjoy receiving gifts until my eldest was around 11/12 and insisted that her dad and I had presents at Christmas!! I avoided for many years as much as I could but strangely within my immediate family of DH and the kids I love to get presents. I feel 100% comfortable in that situation though. A wider family member giving a gift would make me anxious.

@caravanbuckie I feel a similar distinction. I love getting gifts from my dc and the whole pantomime of “what could this be…?” and silly guesses. I wonder if I will still feel the same when they’re adults though.

@Ballymaloo fair play for putting yourself through the eBay palaver. I just put mine in the charity bag

@PinkBuffalo I’ve never considered whether wrapped or unwrapped makes a difference.

It’s reassuring to know I’m not the only one

Definitely this for me! (Although mine go to the charity shop - which is a pain as it's out of my way and of course I always forget to actually do it).

I'm always surprised and disappointed with gifts, I don't think people know me very well, or they just think 'she must like any old crap' judging from my house.
What they don't get is that my any old crap is carefully curated!

I hate getting presents and I especially hate opening them in front of people.
So much expectation on your behaviour.
I struggle with making the correct response.