(I’ve name changed for this)
I’ve been a sahm for 15 years, largely because now teen son has autism. He is what used to be called “high functioning” but needs a lot of support and downtime to manage in mainstream school.
I’m losing confidence in my marriage. And I think it’s probably wise to increase my own financial security and independence. My pension is pathetic and while as a couple we have assets, (his) pension and good insurance against illness and death, I’d be up the creek if we divorced.
But my degree is 20 years old, I never finished my masters (4 different attempts - adhd issues), my work history is patchy (autism burnout) and I don’t know where to begin.
When ds is doing well it feels like there’s no reason I shouldn’t work. But when he is in a difficult period it all goes pear shaped. I don’t know what kind of work would facilitate me dropping the ball to manage him.
In the past I’ve found working (and also studying) exhausting and overwhelming because I mask (and I have no idea how not to; it’s not something that I’m choosing to do consciously). I worry that trying to also support high needs kids (I’m including dd who is nt because her needs stem from living with an asd brother) is going to lead to burnout.
DH has been a good provider, and a good partner in the main but lacks emotional intelligence and empathy with the dc.
Has anyone navigated this? Or can anyone suggest where to even begin? I know I’m full of excuses - I’m just not seeing the woods for the trees.
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I need to get back to work and I don’t know where to begin
3 replies
Bearsporridge · 17/09/2022 17:04
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