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This board exists primarily for the use of Neurodiverse Mumsnetters. Others are welcome to post but please be respectful.

Neurodiverse Mumsnetters

"Is Autistic" or "has Autism"?

21 replies

Randomword6 · 12/09/2022 11:16

Help! I feel strongly that the idea that someone "has Autism" feeds right into the medical model that this is a deficit, an illness that needs to be cured. I see so many posts on here using the term "has Autism" even people who are Autistic or have autistic children. So every time I see this I want to say all of the above. There isn't time to do it! What do other neuro-diverse people on here think?

OP posts:
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BoardLikeAMirror · 12/09/2022 12:04

I prefer am or is Autistic.

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ofwarren · 12/09/2022 22:13

I'm autistic, I dont "have autism".

"Is Autistic" or "has Autism"?
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Randomword6 · 13/09/2022 14:00

I think it's important but don't want to be judgy if people get it wrong.

OP posts:
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BeyondYie · 13/09/2022 15:18

I tend to say I have autism, if I was talking about someone else I'd use whatever they preferred.
I am not getting it wrong, it's just my personal preference.

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ofwarren · 13/09/2022 21:14

Randomword6 · 13/09/2022 14:00

I think it's important but don't want to be judgy if people get it wrong.

Same. I don't correct people but it is my preference.

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sidewayswalking · 14/09/2022 08:07

Randomword6 · 13/09/2022 14:00

I think it's important but don't want to be judgy if people get it wrong.

You are being judgy by suggesting people are getting it wrong. What the hell?

You may prefer 'has', I prefer 'is'

Im not in denial about what I am though. I do have a disorder. I don't want it to be be sugar wrapped for me. Im happy that there is that acknowledgment because without it I would probably be dead.

Language is important, but your choice isn't any more important than mine.

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CoffeeWithCheese · 14/09/2022 08:26

Honestly? I don't care. I tend to use autistic for myself - but I do refer to DD2 as having autism as I feel it's HER choice how much of an element of her identity she chooses to make it as she grows up in life.

I just personally hate the fact that progress toward improving QOL for individuals on the spectrum gets knocked back by endless fucking arguments about this to be honest. Can paint it purple and call it Dave for all I care - if you're going to stop being a knob to people with the condition.

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Clarice99 · 14/09/2022 09:12

ofwarren · 12/09/2022 22:13

I'm autistic, I dont "have autism".

Same here, I'm autistic.

Love the pic @ofwarren

😂😂😂

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timeofillusion · 14/09/2022 10:25

Both. I have autism and I'm autistic. Sometimes I say 'my autism' as in 'because of my autism I .....'
Personally I'd use whatever your personal preference is unless someone who has autism expresses a preference for something else. Freedom of speech and all that.

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BachAndByte · 17/09/2022 07:20

I tend to say that I am autistic, although I don’t really care if people use “has autism” when talking about me.

I also say I am dyslexic, but that I have ADHD and dyspraxia. No idea why I frame things differently, though.

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PurpleBlis · 18/09/2022 17:30

I am dyslexic, I don't bring my dyslexia with me

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Scautish · 19/09/2022 22:01

I am autistic. I do not have autism.

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kingsleysbootlicker · 07/10/2022 00:17

I use either term, depending on which flows better in conversation at that time, and I don't view them as having different meaning. Tbh, I can't stand how the terminology has become such a big deal and I think it takes the focus away from awareness and education around Autism

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SnacksToTheMax · 17/10/2022 15:06

When referring to myself I prefer to say I’m autistic - for me, it feels more like a mode of being (akin to sexuality or left handedness) rather than a condition or disorder that I possess, although I’m aware that behaviours come as part of it which others may consider disordered/unusual relative to ‘the norm’.

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Tilly10too · 17/10/2022 17:07

I don't really mind either, I tend to say that I am autistic on the rare occasions I share with anyone. What I don't like is being described as 'suffering' with autism.

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putitinthefuckitbucket · 03/11/2022 17:41

I'm autistic. I don't have autism, it's not a disease.

Although I do say I 'have' ADHD too, which i suppose is somewhat contradictory. 'I'm an ADHD'er' maybe?

I'm neurodivergent also works but most people don't know what that means Grin

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FracturedTibiaSergeant · 05/12/2022 22:18

Tilly10too · 17/10/2022 17:07

I don't really mind either, I tend to say that I am autistic on the rare occasions I share with anyone. What I don't like is being described as 'suffering' with autism.

Reminds me of that joke

“Does anyone in your family suffer from insanity?”

”On the contrary, we all seem to rather enjoy it”

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xyhere · 06/12/2022 10:40

FracturedTibiaSergeant · 05/12/2022 22:18

Reminds me of that joke

“Does anyone in your family suffer from insanity?”

”On the contrary, we all seem to rather enjoy it”

Absolutely love that!

I'm autistic. The way I see it...autism is what makes me "me", it can't be separated from my personality or behaviour. It can't be "cured" or altered in any way (and nor would I want it to be), so referring to myself as "person plus this other thing that affects my behaviour and personality" is both redundant and pointless, not least because it's not possible that anybody would be able to ever determine what the notional "person" component would look like on its own.

I do correct people if they're talking about me specifically, because I also feel pretty strongly that it's a personal choice, and I also explain exactly why - that in itself is kind of an autistic thing, I guess, but for NTs who aren't too familiar with what autism really is it can also kick off a valuable discussion.

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amusedbush · 06/12/2022 13:58

I'm autistic. Being autistic isn't always easy but it's at the core of who I am - it shapes all of my experiences and perceptions. If it was to vanish tomorrow, I wouldn't be the same person.

I tend to say "I'm autistic and have ADHD" in conversation but the written shorthand "AuDHD" is becoming more widely understood, too.

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ManageableLifeLadee · 08/12/2022 23:24

I'm Autistic too. But it still holds a giant level of cringe like an AA statement for me and I still feel weird saying it due to years of hiding it. I say it because that helps me own it, but I also sort of hate saying it because it creates a massive cloud of preconceived ideas and attitudes in others.
I prefer saying 'I am a woman with Asperger's.'
But that has become political and exhausting and fuck...being autistic within is enough, the without element...I hate this conversation so much.
'Fuck you I am me and it is none of your business' is my deepest truth.
But yeah OK 'I'm Autistic' seems to be the prescribed social line now that bestows some level of surface level safety on us in managed society.
Below that managed safety level we are thought of as precious weirdos who need to snap out of it and accept whatever reality NT's deem us as having.
'I'm autistic' is often akin to a bell ringing and someone shouting 'bring out your passive aggressive hate' in a village full of sackcloth wearing, difference hating, know it all twats.

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username8888 · 10/12/2022 20:20

I think 'I am autistic' or he is autistic is better. I also prefer ASC, rather than ASD. People with autism aren't disordered

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