Are you really an introvert, or are social spaces just too inaccessible for you?

[ofwarren]

I've just seen this question asked on Instagram and found it really interesting and it really made me think.

I've always said I'm an introvert but maybe it's true that if the places were more accessible to my needs, then maybe I'd be more social 🤔

What do you think?

The way to make them accessible for me would be all the people not being there 😂 so introvert I guess. There's nothing they could do really to make it accessible apart from building me my own personal buildings, supermarkets etc.
Which I'm not opposed to if a billionaire wants to spend some of there money on me 😂

As long as the people don't talk to me I'm okay.
Actually, I don't mind talking to none judgemental people or other autistics. So long as I don't feel the need to mask.
That's what made me stop and think that I'm possibly less introverted than I thought.

Oooh I need to think about this. I used to think I was a massive introvert, but then used to seek noise and people. Then I crashed and burned and now I just don’t know. I think maybe if people accepted my need for jumping up and down, spinning my arms around, singing randomly and dancing then we would get on just fine.
However, they also need to fuck off when I want them to.

Yeah it's a tough one isn't it. Really made me think.

I’ve read about extrovert/introvert being determined by how you get energy - eg does socialising give you energy or take it away.

For me it depends who it’s with. I’m absolutely energised by some people but drained by most.

@RreaqTired this made me laugh. We have a camper and I love travelling in the off season. Everywhere is so much nicer without other people.

For me it’s definitely that social spaces are overwhelming. I’m a massive extrovert, so people are fine - but I’m hypersensitive to sound so loud places and lots of people talking at the same time = immediate sensory overload.

It would be really nice if all places could write a brief synopsis of what happens in their building. I don't give two hoots about how crowded or noisy it is but I want to know before I go in if I order at the bar or is my order is taken? How do I pay and when? Just a detailed account done once and on the website would settle my mind and I could breeze through with confidence.

When I'm in a new place no matter how much I end up liking the place the first time I go I'm like a rabbit in the head lights and I can't even put a front on to seem like I'm feeling OK. I struggle to engage in it and with people.

When I'm around new people I feel the same but if I was expecting to see new people I can mask to hide my dazed feeling. If it's unexpected then all they get from me is rabbit in the headlights which I find really embarrassing.

I don't particularly have specific sensory issues unless what I've described is a sensory in itself. As in my brain is taking extra long to take in all the new visual information. It feels like my brain is processing in slow motion.

Dog brain vs cat brain. When entering an unfamiliar but safe space, a dog will usually very quickly 'map' by moving around the room and gaining information about the space mainly via sniffing.

If you watch a cat in the same situation, they will find a quiet and hidden spot and sit and observe for a while before then exploring the space.

They are both checking the space is safe, and part of that includes checking that no predators are present. I would imagine it's somewhat of a subconscious process now that these animals are largely domesticated, i.e. most domesticated animals, assuming they haven't suffered abuse, won't automatically flee from a human present in the room.

Our ancestors probably had more of the 'cat' approach but modern life requires us to act more like a dog. It's a tension which I feel is more keenly felt in people who take in lots of information about a new space in a short period of time. It could also relate to a person's attitude to self-preservation and risk.

@AthenaWhite that would be just amazing.