Hi - I am not sure but I think I might have ADHD

[sparklins]

So sorry, I am posting here without a diagnosis or anything else other than my own suspicions.
I was hoping I can perhaps list some things/behaviors and hopefully get a little bit of advice from people that know a lot more about these topics than me and tell me if this is something I should seek a diagnosis for or if I am just completely off on one and clearly have no idea what I am talking about.

Here it goes

• I have always had trouble focusing at school, I would frequently zone out and not even know we had assignments, homework or had to bring something in, I was often called scatterbrained and pulled up on my lack of attention - this improved as I got older, I have worked super hard on it and now I put a lot of effort into putting things into calendars for my own DC and remembering dates, arrangements, birthdays and so on.


• I procrastinate like crazy, mostly on devices but I can literally sit and watch shadows dance on a wall rather than get on with a task be it housework or my actual job. This has been impacting me a lot, my house (and car) is a mess and I hate it, I can't describe how much I hate having it messy and I can't focus when it's messy! I have been trying to get a hang of it for years but nothing helps, my room when I lived at home was the same. Sometimes I go on a mad blitz and spend 8-9 hours cleaning and de-cluttering like crazy and when I'm doing that I feel like I could clean always and everyday and then I wake up the next morning and I am back to the old ways.


• It takes a tremendous amount of effort to sit and get focused on a task. I work on a computer and just end up down google rabbit holes. I then fall behind on my work and then can't get on with it because I am stressing about how behind I am.


• I overshare and find it hard to hold conversations and know how to be in one on one social conversations.


• I have no friends and struggle to make them which is shit


• If someone mentions a topic I know about I have to really resist the urge to say everything I know about that topic as I have just found something in the conversation I can contribute to.


• When it comes to work I have to really sit down and break down all the steps of a task to feel like I can start, then if there is another step or process that needs to be added that reveals itself as I work I get super thrown off and frustrated and often need to stop.


• I have noticed that a lot of the time when I try and explain things the most logical and simple way I think people often don't know what I am talking about and I need to clarify and other people can often make the same point but in a way everyone instantly understands - I have found this really frustrating over the years and it took a while for me to gather that this is a repeating pattern.


• I'm never myself in social situations because I feel like I am not very good at them or likeable so I usually try to pretend I am much more put together than I really am


• I don't know how I have managed to get to where I am and have this lovely DP and my DCs - I feel like a complete fraud.


• I even struggle to take my dog on a daily walk even though I love walks and being out with her. I just struggle so much to get on with it.

These are just the main things off the top of my head. I will probably think of even more as I sit here tonight. Sorry it's such a mind dump.
Are these things normal everyday problems for everyone out there or does it sound like there could be something else going on other than just being lazy?

Have you done any of the screening questionnaires? That's a good place to start 😃

Have a look at this. It's from the ADHD Foundation and is really useful if you're starting to explore your symptoms.

I've been wondering this recently myself. All my DC are Autistic, one also has ADHD. I don't see anything of my Autistic DC in me, but DC ADHD is the one that's most like me. I feel like I was smart enough to fake it for a long time as a teen and young adult, with friends and education and life. The inattentive facets are what feels most familiar to me.

• I had a lot of near misses crossing the road, also walking into people, as a teen and young adult, zoned out from my surrounds. After I had my first DC I forced myself to consciously pause and look to cross roads safely, still walk into things though.
• I regularly clip the edges of walls and doors just not paying enough attention. Regular briuses on hips and knees from throngs I walk into.
• I jump from task to task. I'll start one thing, notice something else that needs doing, start doing that, find something else and so on. By the end of the day I'll have multiple piles of documents/toys/laundry strewn around the house, lots of partially done tasks.
• I have very poor organisational skills, U always misjudge the extent of a task, thinking something will take 10 minutes then it takes an hour. I lose my mobile and my keys and various other items multiple times a day.
• I can manage to be organised or focused and complete a task if I really need to, but it's one extreme or the other, either completely focused on that one thing, will go on late at night to get it done, can't stop till it's finished, won't stop to eat, or the jumping from task to task.
• don't know if this is relevant, I struggle to recognise faces of people I know but not well. Can't remember people's names, can't remember left from right.