What have you achieved that you are proud of?

[EssexLioness]

I am mid 40s, diagnosed aged 40. I have a very happy life but have achieved very little. I struggle to feel proud of anything. I am bright and went to uni but struggled to hold down any sort of job. I work very part time at home (around 4 hours a week), no kids, do a little volunteering and struggle to keep on top of housework. Energy levels often low. Feel like life is passing me by but don’t know what to do in order to feel a sense of pride. I can be quite hard on myself but I do feel like a failure and as though everyone must think that of me.

At 36, I think I'm proud of the fact I'm still here, I've had some really dark days, and I've finally asked for help

Oh I have ADHD diagnosed last year at 36.

Diagnosed autistic a couple of years ago aged 31.

I’m proud of the fact that I’ve worked bloody hard to understand myself better and find ways to do things that work for me. I maintain my own boundaries to avoid sinking back into the pit of depression. I accept when I am unable to do something and no longer blame myself for it. I’ve made big changes in my life to improve my mental health and I’m no longer forcing myself to do things the same way as anybody else.

OP - your job, your energy levels, and your grasp on housework does not make up everything you are as a person. Keep reminding yourself of that and I love the phrase “what other people think of me is none of my business”

@Megmargs thank you, a lot of what you said rings true. I have also learned to protect my boundaries to protect my mental health and you are right in ‘what other people think of me is none of my business’. I struggle with that sometimes

Your value does not lie in what you can achieve, but in that you are a unique person.

(nearly posted dies instead of does, my spell checker got the giggles and nearly did not update me in time. She will be going to bed in a mo, so watch for the deterioration in spelling. )

@BlackeyedSusan yes you are right, I just struggle to remember that at times

yeah me too.

takes real effort sometimes. especially of one reads others' social media editted highlights.

if.

(see spell checker has gone to bed)

I've got no real achievements either to be honest. I just coast through life and find just existing really hard.

I can relate to a lot of that op. I nearly didn’t click on this thread because I couldn’t think of anything I’m proud of. I feel like I had so much potential and am a massive under achiever.

I'm proud of my resilience and positive self-talk, which I think is partly due to nature, but also owes much to the way my mother and wider family championed me as a child.

Girls with autism 'didn't exist' when I was growing up in the 1980s/early 90s and I was very obviously an outlier from a young age, but I grew up in a very supportive family (who, with hindsight, I now realise are almost certainly generationally ND) where we were encouraged to 'celebrate our oddness' in many ways.

Interestingly, the part of my life where I feel I was most autistic was in my mid-late 20s (not long before my diagnosis in my early 30s - am 43 now) - I was away from my family and my 'tribe' at university and masking madly in an attempt to fit in with an NT workplace.

I reached crisis point when I was 29, took some time out and, with the support of my family and partner, realised who I was and what I needed. I now have a wonderful life and I'm pleased that I have been able to get here.

I’m not diagnosed but im 99% certain I am on the spectrum. DD is and we match.

Im proud that last week at a work thing my colleague said they thought I was a positive person. I try hard to keep that positive outlook and many many days I fail.

I have found a job that suits me and im good at it and im proud of myself for recognising what my strengths and weaknesses are and playing to them.

Im good in work but my house is a complete other story.

@AchillesPoirot

I have found a job that suits me and im good at it and im proud of myself for recognising what my strengths and weaknesses are and playing to them.

Absolutely - finding a positive, supportive environment, doing a job you enjoy and that you're good at, is life-changing.

I got GCSEs of A* or As, A levels and got into my penultimate year of vet school (achieving a 1st class degree for the pre-clinical) before being diagnosed with ADHD and Autism.
I am not sure I am proud of it though as I almost killed myself due to burn out.

My next exams start in a week and then it only gets harder from there.

I hope in the future to have a family. That would make me feel so proud.