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Neurodiverse Mumsnetters

Use this forum to discuss neurodiverse parenting.

Original poster

Anyone else find baths or showers traumatic?

24 replies

ofwarren · 05/04/2022 20:44

This is the neurodiverse mumsnetters board so please bear that in mind before commenting

I've just psyched myself up for a bath and am now lay on the bed recovering. It's sensory hell, but not quite as hellish as the shower.

I hate getting naked, I hate the feel of the water, I hate getting water in my ears and on my face, I hate how warm it makes me, I hate how cold and uncomfortable I feel when I get out, I hate the drag of my damp skin, I hate having wet hair...

It makes me feel hot and faint. My cheeks are red and I feel a bit sick.

Any other haters?

OP posts:
BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 05/04/2022 21:03

Yeah, I don't mind being under the water in a nice shower and getting clean, but I hate having no clothes on and the wet, soggy feeling when you step out. I end up freezing cold in winter and boiling hot in summer.

Baths are very uncomfortable and I always end up over heated, so very rarely have one.

BlackeyedSusan · 05/04/2022 21:24

There's nowt wrong with a good wash. (The horrified of mumsnet will be doing it soon too when they see the price of the electricity to heat the water, just think of yourself as an eco friendly trend setter!)

Original poster
ofwarren · 05/04/2022 21:26

@BlackeyedSusan

There's nowt wrong with a good wash. (The horrified of mumsnet will be doing it soon too when they see the price of the electricity to heat the water, just think of yourself as an eco friendly trend setter!)

True
I never comment on those threads as I'd be pounced on Grin

OP posts:
LilyRed · 05/04/2022 23:36

Susan absolutely! I was just coming on to say that.

The house bathroom does have a big shower and I feel comfortable in there, but am out as soon as possible - never got over water-saving in the 70s!

BlackeyedSusan · 06/04/2022 00:36

autistic, fixed in my ways, since the fecking seventies, just waiting for the trend to come around again.

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 06/04/2022 00:45

I quite enjoy a nice warm shower, but I absolutely can not do baths and haven't had one in 30 years or so. I hate the sensation of wrinkly skin and sitting in my own dirty bathwater. Just nope.

PollyPutTheKettleOnKettleOn · 06/04/2022 00:53

I find this really interesting, for me showers really help when I'm overwrought for one reason or another but especially when I've got sensory overload. On these occasions I often find my clothes uncomfortable and love the privacy and the water of the shower. It's soothing and 'resets' me - it's my Go To for taking time out so I can get on with my day/evening having washed the stress and anxiety of sensory overload down the drain.

It must be really hard for you when they have the opposite effect Sad

I agree nothing wrong with a good wash though Grin

Stossi · 06/04/2022 14:59

Baths are my happy place, to the point my shoulders and back are actually fecked from how many hours I spend in the bath. I go in when I'm stressed, after a meltdown, to relax.

Showers are awful, the sound of the water hitting the tray, the feeling of the water hitting me, the water in my face dripping down me Envy

LilyRed · 07/04/2022 00:09

I was just thinking how odd it is that I love swimming and hydrotherapy- albeit in a costume with shorts now (boyleg? - what a stupid name!), but do not enjoy baths, long showers etc.

I have always wished that GPs could prescribe a hydrotherapy cure for achy bits as they do in European countries with hydrothermal spa baths - No chance of it happening here, far too expensive!

StationaryMagpie · 07/04/2022 09:47

i have issues with showers, i love it when i'm in them, the feel of the water is relaxing, but i HATE getting in, i HATE getting out, and i HAAAAAAATE being damp >.

AfterSchoolWorry · 07/04/2022 09:51

Sensory hell is right!

I don't do baths really. Can't bear hot water. I do lukewarm quick showers, I hate to be wet.

Peaness · 07/04/2022 10:33

Gosh, I thought it was just me! I hate showers and washing my hair. I hate feeling wet. I'm psyching myself up to a shower and hair wash later today and it's all I can think about!

ItsMutinyontheBunty · 07/04/2022 10:51

I used to really struggle as a kid. My Mum didn’t understand (wasn’t diagnosed til I was an adult). I’ve got better and actually it’s part of my routine now…however I do feel distressed having wet hair so I have one of those hair wraps so my wet hair isn’t on my shoulders.

I broke my leg a while back and couldn’t shower til I got the right equipment. I felt so grubby after a couple of days. For me that’s worse than the sensory issues of the shower or bath.

Mabelface · 07/04/2022 12:49

Once I'm in the bath or shower, I'm good. It's actually getting myself there and doing it. I wish I had a shower cubicle rather than over the bath where the temperature was set, I'd find it much easier. Right now, I bathe on Tuesday evenings and shower on Saturday mornings. I'm working up to adding in a Thursday evening. Hate stripping off and getting dry.

Original poster
ofwarren · 07/04/2022 13:18

I quite like swimming funnily enough. I HATE getting changed afterwards though. No time to dry yourself properly, the chlorine makes your skin feel weird and you end up having to leave with damp hair.
Much better swimming on holiday so the sun can dry you afterwards.

OP posts:
Somuddled · 07/04/2022 13:28

I don't have quite as strong reaction as you but I do hate getting undressed and re dressed (to the point that I delay even going for a wee if I can help it) and hate water on my face or ears. I focus on getting the temperature right and only use the hand held shower head, not the horrible big one. It gives me more control and is quite in comparison.

LadyCordeliaFitzgerald · 07/04/2022 14:38

I hate showers. It feels like an attack. I struggle to process the difference in water temp between middle of the head and the edges, and also the difference between the temp under the water flow and out of it.

(And don’t get me started on the abomination that is shower sex Blush)

I like baths, mainly because my dc accept me locking them out for an hour! It feels more controllable to me.

Ds hates baths and showers and complains that his skin doesn’t feel his own for days afterwards. I know I should get him in the habit of washing regularly and it’s basic parenting but I understand how hard it is.

LilyRed · 08/04/2022 00:20

When I was in Hospital last year, the ward shower died a death so we were all given huge disposable wipes that they use for bed baths - these were actually very good, I would use them again and have been trying to get MIL to use them as she won't shower and won't allow anyone else (a carer) to help.

You can also get caps that you add a little water to to wash hair with no rinsing - my friend used to use them on one of her DS with ADHD when he was younger.

PollyPutTheKettleOnKettleOn · 08/04/2022 00:43

I HATE getting changed afterwards though. No time to dry yourself properly, the chlorine makes your skin feel weird and you end up having to leave with damp hair

Couldn't agree more with this!

duvetdayforeveryone · 11/04/2022 18:46

Yes!!! @ofwarren I feel exactly the same way!!!

I bathe once a month Blush

The only time I shower is during a heatwave, as I hate feeling sweaty more than I hate showers.

AffIt · 12/04/2022 11:02

I don't find them traumatic as such - once I'm actually in the shower or bath, it's often quite nice - but OMG, the FAFF: taking your clothes off, getting wet, getting dry, putting clothes back on, wet towels, wet floors etc.

It feels like such an event and just takes up so much mental bandwidth that I could be doing other things with.

hoorayandupsherises · 12/04/2022 11:29

I'm alright once I'm under the water - it's the transitions that I hate, so I put off as long as I can. I hate the idea of being in there. And then once I'm in, I hate getting out. Oh and absolutely hate having water in my face. Shower head has to be positioned to avoid water going over my face at all costs and always back to shower.

A fannel and a bar of soap are my old friends.

BeyondPurpleTulips · 28/04/2022 14:04

I'm okay in the shower/bath itself, but getting out literally makes me ill - I can't cope at all with the feeling of being damp. Same in hot clammy weather (but fine in hot dry weather)

felulageller · 01/05/2022 18:17

I'd only wash every 6 weeks or so if left to myself.

I loathe feeling wet.

Thankfully I don't sweat.

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