Focusing on The Wrong Thing and answering the question nobody asked

[Percie]

Answered a post on social media earlier for the first time in ages. I'm now sitting here embarrassed because I've realised I answered a question they didn't ask about the detail that was only incidental and not the point they were getting at.

Why, if I have to miss the point, do I have to realise later that that's what I've done? 😔

If you do this, how do you deal with it? Do you say something/apologise, pretend nothing happened or avoid the person for a few months?

I change my name.

head in sand rightaway....or sneak back and delete the comment

Deleting the comment does seem the best option!

I go back and answer the actual question, with a caveat that autistic brain missed the point first time round. Don't be embarrassed, you're human!

This happens to me quite often, especially if someone is being sarcastic or making a joke and I don't realise.
If it's people who know I'm autistic I just say "ignore me and my autistic brain" and if they don't know me I'd probably just sneakily delete the comment.

Maybe it’s because I’m ND that these are the kind of comments I find most interesting?

I have a tendency to do this - I have often spent the first few days of essay/project writing deep diving into rabbit holes and only realising when I’ve thoroughly researched and written thousands of words that I’m nowhere near the question.

It’s harder in actual social interactions. I’m in the avoid for months category but I’m sure there are better ways to handle it

Wow is this a thing? Where would I find out some more? My oh and i frequently argue because I have answered the wrong bit of what he said. Or something like that. He thinks I’m wilfully misinterpreting him: I think I’m giving a straightforward answer. It’s odd.

@ofwarren I have deleted the comment as almost nobody knows about my diagnosis

@LadyCordeliaFitzgerald I did this with my masters dissertation (ridiculous since I wrote the question) and ended up rewriting the thing 2 weeks before submission

@SmallElephants that sounds very familiar! I just want to get things straight, to make sure I'm understanding, but apparently I'm focused on the wrong thing. Surely, then, it's quicker to just answer the point and clear up the problem and get onto the other stuff?

My ex used to mock me & say "that would be the post office you're looking for" (reference to a 'joke' about Irish people thinking they know what you actually mean & answering the question they've decided you wanted to ask instead of the one you actually did).

Some of my best ideas & work came from thinking that way though.