Getting that 'wound up' feeling about some changes at work

[BoardLikeAMirror]

Disclaimer - I'm looking particularly for ND perspectives on this thread - thank you

I've started on the spiralling feeling of getting wound up about some things that are happening at work. I always have a feeling of panic when changes are announced even if they're not huge. The rational side of me says these are nothing major, I need to calm down etc. but the rest of me can't quell it and I'm getting more and more tense, and it seems inevitable that sooner or later I am going to speak or act inappropriately and there will be nothing I can do to stop it even though the rational me will be watching on the sidelines and cringing.

Can anyone relate to this and do you have any advice about how I can get myself out of this spiral?

I can relate. Does your manager know about your diagnosis? Would they be open to going through the changes step-by-step with you and looking at individual impact so you have more of a plan/something more certain to go with?

Work dropped an immediate effect change bombshell recently which turned out to be the final straw in my ability to cope and I've been off sick since, so I understand the anxiety these things induce.

Thank you for replying. I don't have a formal diagnosis as yet - I have been referred but my GP warned me it could be a long wait. I'm worried about sharing this at work without a diagnosis to support me, in case it's seen as me trying to make excuses.

On past occasions I have had (retrospectively mortifying) verbal 'meltdowns' in response to changes including one with a senior manager where I burst into tears. I'm now in a state of anxiety and struggling to concentrate on the daily tasks I'm doing.

It's a good idea to ask for a meeting to go through the changes - it's not knowing exactly how they will affect me that's driving my anxiety, I can't begin the process of mentally working through how I can manage them. Once I know I will feel better but at the moment I am heavily catastrophizing.

If they're willing to meet and give that detail then that would be a good first step. Is this the type of change with a project or comms team who could offer a timeline or are looking for 'champions' to support the change? It might help you be ahead of the change if so.

It depends on how supportive your manager is when it comes to the diagnosis. I got on well with mine and told them when I'd been for the first screening appointment and sent for the assessment/diagnosis. They took me at my word and made adjustments as needed, then I confirmed post-diagnosis. How do you think yours would react? Are you in a large organisation?

I can completely relate to this - it's a horrible feeling, and you have my sympathies.

I work in IT / systems development at director level in a medium-sized global consultancy (big enough, but not 'Big 4', if you know what I mean). Quite a large part of my role is in change management (the irony is not lost on me ).

I am very happy and settled in my role - I like my job and I'm very fond of my colleagues - but I have been through two significant acquisitions in the past, one of which went pretty well, and the other ended very badly for everybody - guess which one my brain goes to go when change that I'm not in control of is on the horizon?

I think I've mentioned before that I'm not 'out' at work, as I personally have never felt the need (IT is generally quite an ND-friendly place to be!), but I absolutely do support RA in the workplace where needed and I don't even think you should need a formal diagnosis for this.

Absolutely ask for a meeting with your manager but bear in mind that, depending on what level they themselves are at, they may not know the details.

Is there a project manager, change management team or similar overseeing this? If so, I would suggest contacting them informally and seeing if there are plans in place for updates, champions, user support etc. Generally speaking, most will respond well to suggestions (change is HARD and positive input from users is always useful!).

I hope you feel better soon - it's not a pleasant position to be in.

I can also relate.

My diagnosis along with Access to Work recommendations have made a big difference to how management respond when confronted with me asking for clarity about any changes and providing a plan.

Whilst you're waiting for an assessment, you can self refer to Access to Work (ATW) to have an assessment about your work related requirements, which can include management support and actions required around elements of your role that you may struggle with i.e. change. You don't need a diagnosis to self refer to ATW.

Thank you so much for your replies.

It is a large company and, like most large companies, the headline is that they are very hot indeed on anything that falls under the 'inclusion and diversity' umbrella, but people's anecdotal experience is often that, at a lower level, they don't always live up to their ideals - e.g. denying flexible working requests (not that that is something which would personally help me).

Is this the type of change with a project or comms team who could offer a timeline or are looking for 'champions' to support the change?

I've no doubt there will be local champions but they tend to be selected rather than volunteers. It would be an idea to engage directly with a champion, though, as they tend to be more approachable than managers, so I will look out for them being published. If by any chance they do ask for volunteers it certainly wouldn't hurt to wave my hand!

How do you think yours would react?

It's hard to say - from my point of view I feel I get on OK with my manager, but I was moved into a new team at the start of 2020 so I don't feel I know her perhaps as well as I would if I'd worked with her for two 'normal' years. I'm just a bit shy of 'announcing' it I suppose because it would make me a focus of her attention which I hate - I'm the sort of person who just prefers to get quietly on with the job with minimal intervention.

Whilst you're waiting for an assessment, you can self refer to Access to Work (ATW) to have an assessment about your work related requirements,

I had no idea a service like that would be available pre-diagnosis - thank you very much for that information, I will look into it.

I was able to bury myself in a complicated piece of work this afternoon and I feel a bit calmer now it's been put on a lower shelf in my brain for a while, but it's sort of simmering there and I'm very nervous that I'm going to spiral again and start blurting, or even firing off emails which I'll later regret.

Like many large companies, mine has always been the sort of place that can't go for more than a year without having a restructure of some kind or completely changing working practices, and now they have decided the pandemic is over, there really is an 'all change' atmosphere, and I function very badly in that environment - I need routine and stability (I know I am far from alone in that)!

Thank you for all your suggestions, they really are helpful.

@BoardLikeAMirror

As you work for a large company, I presume there's an Occupational Health Department or similar? If so, you can ask your manager to refer you there.

Again, you don't need a formal diagnosis for a referral. At this appointment, you can discuss your requirements at work based on your health conditions and/or neuro-diversity. Recommendations can be made by the Occupational Health department for work based accommodations.

Thank you @Clarice99 - that's another good idea, again it hadn't occurred to me to ask about OH involvement before diagnosis.