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Original poster

Do you ever go mute?

22 replies

ofwarren · 16/02/2022 18:56

It doesn't happen very often but when it does, it's triggered by something stressful.
My brain seems to go blank and I can't find the words I need. I start slurring the words that I can find and then eventually am not able to talk at all.

When in this state I can still communicate by text or written, it's just verbally that I can't communicate.
If I sleep, I'm verbal again when I wake up, otherwise it can last anything from 30 minutes to a few hours.

OP posts:
sadpapercourtesan · 16/02/2022 18:59

I do! So does my extremely articulate and hyper-verbal DS1. We both have situations where we just lose the ability to speak. I find it terrifying, it's like my tongue physically seizes up and I just dither and feel sick.

It's one of the reasons my sister and I are NC. She knew exactly how to push my buttons to push me into that state, and would then jeer and draw attention to me. She did it the whole time we were growing up.

Original poster
ofwarren · 16/02/2022 19:01

That's awful sadpaper! Really, really cruel Sad

OP posts:
Nortd · 16/02/2022 19:04

Yes, during and after a meltdown it feels like my jaw freezes up, like you I get slurred speech and I just have to be silent and communicate via text.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 16/02/2022 19:07

I go mute before a meltdown. I also go mute if I'm seeking help and the person starts messing me around - like doctors for example. Dh has to go with me and take over if I clam up.

Original poster
ofwarren · 16/02/2022 19:07

I feel like because I can still communicate by text, people think I'm making it up. My husband has been known to get annoyed with me when it happens.

OP posts:
Original poster
ofwarren · 16/02/2022 19:09

I can't argue with people because of it. My brain doesn't work fast enough to think of the words I need and eventually the words don't come at all.

OP posts:
BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 16/02/2022 19:42

I can't argue with people because of it. My brain doesn't work fast enough to think of the words I need and eventually the words don't come at all.

This happens to me and I get angry and swear 😕 it's safest if I just don't talk at this stage.

Texting to communicate makes sense because it gives the brain the time and space to select the right words and expressions. I don't believe that speech comes naturally to ND people and that our brains aren't wired up well in the area of speech. I feel like I'm speaking another language badly when I'm talking. I can write stuff down though.

Percie · 16/02/2022 20:33

When I'm having difficult conversations with DP and things get too stressful/emotional then I just can't get the words out any more. It's like I'm thinking in something other than words and I can't do the translation any more. It can take a while to get back to normal.

watchtheglitterdustswirl · 16/02/2022 21:12

No, not as an adult. I didn't realise until I filled out the paperwork for my ASD assessment that I did it a handful of times as a child.

I described it as just my words being gone. I can remember it clearly and it happened only when I'd been upset.

ClumpingBambooIsALie · 16/02/2022 23:38

Yep, when it happens I get repetitive (same chunk of words over and over no matter what I actually want to say) then spoken words are gone. Also fine with writing.

PeacefulPrune · 19/02/2022 21:58

@Percie I could have wrote exactly what you just said.

I don't go completely mute but my processing speed slows right down. And my ability to put thoughts into words becomes soooo difficult. I don't always think in words anyway. And when I don't think in words I sort of feel guilty about it because I think it might be further making it difficult for me to verbalise things.

PeacefulPrune · 19/02/2022 22:03

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation I feel like any form of expression doesn't come naturally to me. I struggle to get my words out verbally in certain situations: new place, new people & stressful times. At the best of times I still regularly forget words.

But I also hate writing.

My face rarely shows how I'm feeling

But I think I understand people well. I understand people's body language, I can read in-between the lines. And I feel like this just adds to my frustration. I understand well but struggle to communicate and express.

Percie · 20/02/2022 08:28

@PeacefulPrune I think the guilt makes it worse because it's always in situations where I want to communicate and I know how important it is that I do.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 20/02/2022 09:12

I think this sums it up.

Do you ever go mute?
PeacefulPrune · 20/02/2022 09:19

Yea great graphic. I wish my speaking looked as cute as the horses face though 🤣

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 20/02/2022 09:19

😆😆😆

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 20/02/2022 09:20

Yeah, I look more like an angry warthog 😆🤦‍♀️🤪

Original poster
ofwarren · 20/02/2022 09:21

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation

I think this sums it up.

Ha ha ha 😂
It really is!

OP posts:
PeacefulPrune · 20/02/2022 09:23

🤣🤣🤣 angry wort hogs deserve love too

Burgerqueenbee · 20/02/2022 09:31

Yes I do, and it was particularly bad while I was giving birth. I was very glad restrictions were eased a bit by that time so my DH was with me or I dread to think how much more terrified I would have been.

BlackeyedSusan · 21/02/2022 17:40

You know, I think I might.

BlackeyedSusan · 21/02/2022 17:41

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation

Yeah, I look more like an angry warthog 😆🤦‍♀️🤪
No comment. Pleading the fifth amendment of not incriminating myself. but yeah, angry warthog here too
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