Preventing meltdowns

[Redfloweryellowflower]

So part of my autism is overwhelming meltdowns. The trigger is usually layers of noise that I can't stop/tone down and unfortunately when my dc are whining or melting down themselves it cuts right through to smack the meltdown button in my brain. I really need to prevent or delay this to not fully loose control in front of my dc. Seeing mum yelling, screaming and crying over something small can't be good for them, even if it is only once a week or so. I am working on walking away (but dc2 follows me 😞). I am a single parent and they aren't old enough I can leave them alone so leaving the house is not an option (long solo walks really help but are not possible). I am looking into ear plugs or similar, but so far find them uncomfortable so don't want to wear them constantly. I am working on reducing stresses elsewhere so I have more energy to deal with this.

So what have others found to help in the moment to divert/delay/lesten/prevent a meltdown? Thank you

I can't wear earplugs but do wear headphones to mask the sound when I can't get away. You can still see them so they stay safe and you get a break of sorts.

Tickle the kid worked hear.

They got a big raspberry blown on them.

Try blowing them bubbles. It will calm you and may distract them.

Here. FFS.

I would agree that headphones can help.

Perhaps you could formulate a strategy for when your kids are starting to meltdown that you could implement as soon as it happens. Have a yoga mat that they could lie down on with headphones with relaxing nature sounds or whatever might calm them. You could join in on your own mat. Teach them a simple calming breathing exercise they could do to focus their minds on something positive. Get them to close their eyes and you can dim the room. There are apps to help with this.

I've been on the play store and there's a calming breathing app and some shapes and bubbles etc. to look at. If you put in 'Autism calming apps' in the search box.

5 minute time-out in the back garden for a smoke. You, not them. Single parent here too and lockdown nearly finished me off.

Thank you so much. Some good coping strategies here, I will try them and see what works for us.

I've found that Loop earplugs are very good - they'll reduce noise (particularly higher-frequency children's noise) without dangerously blocking your hearing.

I have the professional musicians' type, but I think the lower grades are good enough for masking everyday noise.

Thank you all. Sorry last night's reply was brief, end of the day and no energy left to communicate!

Will look into headphones and loop ear plugs.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStattion thank you, will try more claiming activities and look into the apps. Sometimes screen time to switch off helps and a calming app could be just the thing.

ItsCarnardBruv I use a cup on tea in the same way 🙂, they know most of the time to let me drink it in peace (and I can get through alot of tea in a day!). I hear you about lockdown. The first one had me on antidepressants before the end and led to a year long burn out. I think I forgot or lost some of my previous coping strategies in that time, and am still finding them again.

Blackeyedsusan actually tickling always used to work, I had forgotten about that. Dc2 (who is the loudest!) loves being tickled. Will definitely bring that back. And chasing and more physical games, (she loves it if I flip her upside down over my shoulder) she loves that and can distract from the moment and help us all get past it.

@ItsCanardBruv

5 minute time-out in the back garden for a smoke. You, not them. Single parent here too and lockdown nearly finished me off.

Hands up that this is my tactic too. My DD is 10 now and neurodiverse herself so she understands and says "Go on, have your 5 mins"

I find that my hyperfocus can sometimes work with this - I get immersed in a kindle or audio book and try to give more positive stimulation to my brain. Otherwise I go for sunglasses and noise cancelling headphones eg on the tube to cope with the bright lights and high pitched noises. Not sure if that's possible if it's kids setting you off though - I don't have any, I just can't cope with their noise/touching/grabbing.

Tickling still works on my teen.

Also to calm after a meltdown, I run fingers through their hair. This calms both parties. (Apparently it works for other primates too)

I've ordered a

Pair of those Loop earplugs.