DH took a nap on my pillow 😥

[ofwarren]

DH went upstairs for a nap after tea while I stayed downstairs with the kids and when I brought them up to bed he was lay on my side AND on my pillow. I really hate my pillow being lay on. I have changed the pillowcase but I just feel like I want to wash the pillow now. He's not dirty but it just feels tainted somehow.
He'd also obviously knocked my book over as when I went to read it, the bookmark wasn't where I left it and I had to find where I was up to.

Anyone else struggle with things like this?

Ewww, no I don't like DP using my pillows either, or breathing at me or on me at night. I would be quite happy to have the European way of a quilt each, too.

He's not dirty, but smokes and comes up to bed stinking of his cigarettes. When I notice it, that's it I want to get up as the smell seems to intensify.

Bedding, blankets and areas on the sofa are sacrosanct. We even have our own mugs, plates and cutlery. I don't even like dh's bedding venturing over onto my side of the bed (we have our own duvets).

My advice would be to air the pillow outside in the fresh air. You could give it a bit of a light spray with some water and essential oil like lemon just to refresh it if you're not able to wash it.

I told DP about the pillow thing today - he thinks I'm hilarious! But he sort of understands it and we had a conversation on the things we do and don't share - like mugs And I have some of my own cutlery

Every day I air the bedroom with both windows open even if it's snowing outside Sunshine is brilliant for getting rid of smells, but we don't get much of that here - I used to hang everything out of the bedroom window to air where we used to live as it was directly out over the garden and with better weather.

Yes, I could use partner's pillow but don't want him on mine and know that sounds selfish, but it's because I'd overthink him coughing etc on my pillow. My pillows are a different thickness, that suits me too, so I'd be annoyed as I offered to buy him the same ones and he didn't want them. I'd get really moody with him as feel put out and overthink it.

Also, if I'm sat on one seat and get up for a drink I need the same seat back to feel relaxed. If he sits there I'll ask him to move.

You all deserve medals 🏅 I won't / can't share my space, home, possessions, bed with anyone other than DD. I may have become slightly more of an intolerant old bint since turning 50, though

@RainbowZebraWarrior hahaha, it takes the patience of a saint and at least one other room you can escape to (plus earplugs!). My children, all adults now, were (mostly) easier.

@RainbowZebraWarrior

You all deserve medals 🏅 I won't / can't share my space, home, possessions, bed with anyone other than DD. I may have become slightly more of an intolerant old bint since turning 50, though

Me too. I have a DS to add to the mix though too. I would sometimes quite like to meet someone new but when I think about living together.... Nope.