Rambling, going off topic, struggling with meetings - diagnosis? Help?

[PeopleNormallyJustStopTalking]

Hi mumsnet,
I’m probably not NT. It doesn’t affect my general quality of life other than some long-term struggles with larger friendship groups (am fine one to one). I was lonely as a child, learning about friendship through books and also was very “struck” by verbal patterning/rhymes so when I got a chance to speak I was considered wacky/off-beat. I still struggle with some types of small-talk. I’m fine with the written word.

I now have a leadership role at work. Reading books on female leadership the thing that stands out is communication style. I really struggle to stay on topic and to be succinct. I ramble, forgetting my own point.
I also struggle with large meetings and can either listen or talk or take notes -I can’t do more than one of those at the same time. The circuits just don’t integrate. I have no poker face except with children.

So - I think I have an integration problem with the oral/aural world. Is this ADHD, can I get it diagnosed and more importantly where can I find out how to improve?

Thanks in advance mumsnet

Could you do some screening questionnaires online and see what they indicate?

You could seek an assessment, but NHS waiting lists are long, so go private if you can afford it.

I used to rely on things being written down when I was at work. I like diagrams and find these easier to follow than just lists of stuff. Mind maps are also useful to help structure thoughts.

Thank you Barrow. If you could point me in the direction of a questionnaire that you have found helpful I’d be very grateful

adhduk.co.uk/adult-adhd-screening-survey/

One for adhd

psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient

One for autism

Thanks will try them!

Hmmm, I got a very low score for the first “main” section of the adhd one. A high score for the second section.

On the autism one I was just over the threshold for potential aspergers. So maybe I have to investigate that first?

Thanks Barrow

Sorry, another question. Do I have to go via my gp to go private?

No, you can choose and approach your own assessor. I was assessed for adhd by PsychiatryUK. I found my own assessor for the autism as well.

Thanks

I also struggle with large meetings and can either listen or talk or take notes -I can’t do more than one of those at the same time. The circuits just don’t integrate.

My DS has this - he cannot listen and take notes at the same time. It's a processing disorder. His school is required to give him printouts of all class notes so that he doesn't have to take notes in class.

He also listens better while standing up and moving around, but this isn't an option at school, so he does his best sitting down - chewing gum and having something to fidget with help him.

As we are not in the UK we just went straight to a private psychologist to get him assessed. Her report was long, detailed, and included all the areas where he has difficulties. He also has ADHD, and slow processing speeds, so he gets accommodations for those too.

He's also spent time with an executive functioning tutor who helped him with his short term memory, and also helped him understand how to cope best in different environments.

Given the NHS waiting lists, I'd find a psychologist privately and get an assessment if you can afford it. Ours was covered by health insurance, but I'd have paid whatever it cost if I'd had to - it was so useful to have all that information.

DH has gone from being a C-D student to an A-B student whose teachers rave about him. His life prospects are immeasurably better now than they were before he was assessed.

is it ok if I ask can anyone advise how much it costs to have a private assessment (in the UK)?

is it ok if I ask can anyone advise how much it costs to have a private assessment (in the UK)?

From what I can gather it's usually around £1500-2000 for an autism assessment. It's usually less for adhd.