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Husband cheating advice

3 replies

Maria123123123123 · 26/06/2025 17:32

I caught my husband texting my SIL (brothers wife) in a very inappropriate manner. Complimenting her and asking for nudes. I dnt knw if she ever sent any nudes but I knw she's been sending selfies. And I knw they've been talking for a while. I'm absolutely heartbroken. He's betrayed me in the worst way possible. I genuinely believe if I hadnt confronted him now then it would have gone further. I cannot believe either of them would do this to me. When I confronted him he denied it again and again then when I showed him proof he had no choice but to admit it. At that point he cried and begged for my forgiveness. He was smacking himself and kept saying how he's made a mistake and he's such a horrible person . But I just had to say I forgive him so he could stop hitting himself. Anyway I've super condensed this post because I've already posted this on another forum. I'm posting here because I wanted islamic advice or just advice from other Muslims on what you would do. We have 2 young kids together. I can't forget the messages it gives me anxiety any time I think about it or anytime someone's says her name. What do I do. I feel likes he's ruined everything i can't even bare to look at or talk to him.

OP posts:
TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 26/06/2025 17:52

Bump

Tipu87 · 26/06/2025 22:32

My sister, lots of duas for you, what a horrible situation to be in. I wish I had some advice I could give. The only thing I want to point out is trust is hard to rebuild once it's been broken and that you shouldn't feel the need to rush it, you have been given good reason to feel the way you do. It's disturbing that he chose to do it with someone so close but more disturbing is the smacking himself, that's just screams manipulation.

MixedBananas · 27/06/2025 21:09

Asalamu Alaykoum sis.
So so sorry this is one of the worst betrayals.
Firstly the choice is yorus and the ball is in your court. He should give you the space to think and make a decision. Your are well within your rights to walk out of this marriage and do Khula.
Make aure you contact your brother and discuss in person alone. So he can also decide what he wants to do.

When you have calmed and in a better head space you need to look at what you want to do. And HE if truely remorseful will respect your wishes. Either way.
He shouldn't be harming himself to get his way. That is manipulation.

The saying once a cheater always a cheater rings true for many. There are exceptions. And to truely forgive him takes a lot of courage and strength. The kids are your main worry also.

I do wish you the best sister. It is a very hard trial. I would qdviae you to contact your local sheikh, ASK Huda etc. Someone with the correct knowledge to discuss options and to start a way to move forward.

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