Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Muslim Mumsnetters

This board exists primarily for the use of Muslim Mumsnetters. Others are welcome to post but please be respectful.

Husband doesnt respond to me when I talk to him

2 replies

Maria123123123123 · 28/01/2025 20:46

My husband doesnt acknowledge me when I'm talking to him. If I tell him something he just stays quiet he doesn't even make eye contact. So I think okay he hasn't heard me. Then if I repeat it he'll be like yeh I heard you. So then I say to him oh I didn't know because u didn't respond. To which he will say I have nothing to say what do u want me to say. its like that's fine but atleast just say okay so I know you've heard what I said. Also I can be a quiet talker so sometimes he genuinely doesn't hear me but it's like how am i supposed to know?? I've brought it up with him many times and he accuses me of wanting to start an argument with him. But I just find it rude and disrespectful ( i didnt say this to him). All i want is to have a conversation with him But a conversation needs to work 2 ways. I explained all this in a calm manner but he was still annoyed. To add to this whenever I voice my feelings with him about something that he may have done to upset me, he just gets annoyed/ upset and says 'I shouldn't come home u just argue with me'.
I don't knw if this is relevant but he's born in Pakistan and me UK so we already don't have a lot in common and dnt have a lot to talk about or dnt have activities we can do together. So when I find something that we can actually talk about I find it frustrating when he doesn't give me his full attention. He spends most of him time at work (self employed) or with his friends. We have 2 young children. The other day I told him come home early from work tomorrow we will watch a movie together. He came early but said his friends have called him out. By the time he came we were both tired. I literally could have argued with him about this but I didn't because tbh I've gotten used to it and I was expecting it and I just can't keep saying the same stuff again and again with no change. At the end of the day if he wanted to spend time with us he would. I feel like he enjoys spending more time with his friends than his family. Atleast he definitely does enjoy his friends' company more than mine. They all have the same job (different areas) so I guess they have a more in common. But I'm sick of bring second best. I feel out marriage is so boring tbh.
Sorry for the super long post. I guess I'm just venting I don't want to share this with anyone I know.
He's a good guy. And although he doesn't spend time with me. He does care about me and the kids. But I guess I'm just tired of the bare minimum.

OP posts:
LeaningOnTheEverlastingArms · 29/01/2025 18:48

Maria, I just wanted to say, I hear you and I’m sorry you are having this hard time in your marriage.

I can’t offer any advice from a Muslim perspective as I’m actually a Christian but I just noticed you had poured your heart out here about him not responding to you when you speak to him and I couldn’t just scroll on without saying ‘I hear you’ and I’m so sorry 😢

ForPeaceSake · 29/01/2025 18:54

That sounds hard and must make you feel so lonely. First, do you have friends around you can talk to or are you mostly at home with the little ones? Men who go out to work don't always realise how the SAHM may be dying for some adult conversation. Similarly when he gets home he might want peace and quiet. Even so, not even acknowledging you is strange. Maybe that's how his parents are so he thinks it's normal?

Sorry your film night failed. If someone could look after the DC could you arrange dinner in a restaurant? Hard to stay silent sitting opposite someone in a restaurant. Small steps.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread