Music lessons for 4 year old.

[Username157]

One of the members of staff at my child’s nursery plays the guitar, which has inspired her to ask for one for her birthday. I’m not musical so have no idea where to start. She has said a few times that she wants to learn. I remember trying and finding it painful.

A keyboard would be a good place to start!

4 is a bit young to learn the guitar. They haven't really got the strength in their fingers to hold the strings down, and it can be uncomfortable - even painful, as you found out yourself.

How about a ukulele? Its compact size is perfect for small hands and developing fine motor skills. Perhaps starting on one-string riffs, basic strumming, and easy-to-learn songs with only two or three chords.

Her hands will be too small for a keyboard too

At 4 and an interest in guitar is go for a ukele and a local kid who plays to teach her a few things (Disney songs?). If she maintains her interest she can have a half sized guitar and more structured lessons.

i am also not remotely musical but both my kids are and it’s such a joy. Our house is always full of music and they are both in bands. Definitely something to be encouraged

....also meant to add about the Ukulele - the strings are made of softer nylon and have less tension so are easier to press. Its smaller size and lighter construction mean it's more comfortable for younger ones to hold and manipulate compared to a guitar, with less wrist strain.

@ThreePears that isn't exactly true. Both my DDs started learning orchestral string instruments at 4 and had no issue holding the strings down. However, it is relatively easy to get hold of 1/16 or 1/8 size violins/cellos and the bows are in proportion. Both DDs are now adults who still play.

Ukelele or recorder.

My husband is a guitar teacher. He is sitting in the room with me so I just asked him and he said about 5 would be the minimum, and even then it would depend entirely on whether their fingers were physically strong enough. Some don't develop the strength until much older, and it can be uncomfortable, even painful for some, and that alone can put people off.

Perhaps orchestral instruments such as the violin are different. The neck is certainly shorter, so the strings wouldn't be at the same level of tension as guitar strings. There is also the issue of the neck of a classical guitar being fairly wide and that would be a problem for those children with small hands.

I think it is an awesome idea. You want you help the child discover her talent early. You might have a future musician on your hands.

For me, piano first. Speciality later.

Piano is the most accessible instrument at a young age. Easy to get something sounding reasonable. It is also a great base for understanding music theory, notation, timing etc. It makes learning other instruments easier.

Given that many, including guitar, are better started a little older. Seeing how it goes with piano first isn't a bad idea, then opening to more options in a few years.

This is true, but I was counteracting your previous comment that four year olds did not have sufficient finger strength to hold the strings down.

DS attends a Saturday morning music school. There is a 4 year old drummer!

Not on the guitar, no. I wouldn't know about other instruments.

I don’t think I would start instrumental lessons on anything at 4, just find a children’s music class and do lots of singing and rhythm games. 6/7 is a better age to start with ukulele (any instrument) and then move to guitar from there.

If she’s desperate to learn then you could do ukulele now but she will probably make as much progress in 2-3 months at age 6 as in 2 years at 4, plus it will be quite boring/tricky for a 4 yo - they don’t tend to love practice at that age and it is essential!

Do you have a local music school? At ours, they can start at 4 years with general lessons on music and gradually move up through the groups, choosing instruments as they go.

Piano is always useful too, but I'd look at starting in a couple of years time.

Ds worked through the groups, and is now studying music at university, with most of his home friends also being musicians.

DC2 wanted to learn but she was 6 when she asked. She started on the ukulele at school and piano at home with me. I wouldn’t pay someone to teacher because there isn’t any point unless they put in 10-15 min practice 5 times a week. If they don’t practice you are paying someone to watch them practice once a week. She didn’t have a piano teacher until 9.

I mean she is enough if you can find a teacher to teach her and she will practice daily at home.

I think 4 is young for anything really although I know some do start orchestral strings at that age. A music class that does a bit of singing and a bit of percussion etc would be better at this age. A uke is probably the best bet or a lap harp as you can make a nice sound on those quite quickly. Having said that the harp is a very slippery path to a life of debt (a concert harp is the best part of £20K and you need a car of the corresponding size to transport it).

Another option would be a floor piano (basically a roll out play mat with piano keys you walk on and that play the note when you do). She could learn to pick out tunes like 3 blind mice on it. If you buy her one then buy yourself ear plugs - don't ask me how i know......

All of this - I’m a music teacher and my heart sinks when someone signs up their under-7. We can do stuff and have a whole load of fun but really it feels like a waste of the parents’ money, especially as the kind of parent who signs their kid up for lessons at 4 tends to have unrealistic expectations.

@ResusciAnnie I'm also a music teacher and by the age of 7, DD1 had passed grade 2 on the cello with distinction. I never had to push her: from the age of 3 she wanted to play the cello. Perhaps taking her to orchestra rehearsals with us when she was a baby was a mistake, but she has turned into a versatile and accomplished musician.

My dcs have done Colourstrings music classes and I'd highly recommend them if there is one near you. They do kindergarten classes up to age 5 or 6, focused on singing, rhythm and movement. Then students start an instrument from age 5 or 6. Many of the conservatoires do Saturday classes for dcs too, if there is one near you (eg Guildhall or RAM in London), or some councils run them. In the ones I've seen details on, they don't start learning instruments straight away, they'll do a year or 2 of musicianship.

I started piano lessons at 4. A keyboard is not too small.

@Malbecfan I think it’s probably very child dependent.

DH and I are both musicians (not strings) and DC1 wanted to play the violin (obsessively) from about 2. He has masses of energy and obviously at that age just wanted to be able to play the Sibelius concerto immediately and thought that if he had his own violin he could (still does tbh). I knew that standing on a template/playing a box/spending months on twinkle wasn’t going to cut it, so we just did loads of musicianship with him and got him violin lessons when he turned 6. He’s 7.5 now so has been playing for 18 months and is working towards his grade 5. I don’t think he’d be any further ahead if he’d started at 4 and might have been frustrated and lost his love for it (or I would have gone mad trying to facilitate the practice). And this is with musician parents.

A more conscientious child might be different- my DC2 is a girl and more compliant, but still only dabbling on piano at almost 5.

I think with non-musician parents (as is the case for OP) there is no good reason to start instrumental lessons early and lots of reasons not to. Singing loads is such a fun and easy way to give them an excellent grounding before getting into the technique of an instrument.

Someone upthread mentioned recorder. I'd (strongly) suggest 4 is too young - DD started at 7 (with me in lockdown) and it took a month for her to reliably master three notes, matched to music. And that was practising every day with someone who could correct her mistakes. She's now working towards grade 8 - I say that to point out that she is capable musically, but it took a while to get going when she was 7. I can only imagine it would have been much worse had she been 4.