I have extreme feelings of guilt over struggling to travel abroad to visit my parent. Around 5 years ago I was diagnosed with a chronic condition in which I am in pain a lot of the time. I manage it well with diet, sleep and medication. I still work and have a good life, if somewhat less exciting as it used to be.
Ive not flown since my diagnosis, the last time I flew was pre diagnosis but whilst I was ill with my condition and I swore I’d never fly again after how poorly the flight made me.
However, one of my parents moved abroad 2 years ago and now wants me to try and visit. It’s only a 3.5 hour flight, is one of the lines. I totally understand how others don’t understand invisible illnesses but the guilt of them perceiving my lack of traveling as ‘I just can’t be bothered’ is killing me. My parent is also poorly and I’ve potentially not got much time left with them.
I’ve tried several times to book a flight and it always leaves me having severe panic attacks. I know people may suggest therapy around this, but I honestly cannot afford it and it’s not based on an irrational fear but a very real concern.
Im hurting because I want to spend time with them, I’d love nothing more than to be out there having a great time with one of my favourite people, but I just have this block. I know the flight would have a knock on effect to the visit, and I’d be staying with my parent, having little control over my schedule which I do need to reduce my flares.
I know some advice is to ‘just get over it’ but if you have a CC, you’ll know it’s difficult to manage and the anxiety around symptoms can be just as crippling.
Anyone have similar experiences?