I think I may be autistic

[3girlmama]

Hi
My daughter (10) was diagnosed level 1 high functioning ASD in 2016.
My brother, although not diagnosed, definitely has some kind of ASD.
I have suffered with depression and anxiety since my mid teens and been on and off meds and in and out of counselling, CBT etc since 18 years of age.

I had PND with dd1 and PNA with dd2. None with DD3.
I have OCD.

All my life I have never fitted in. Everything is black and white, there is no grey. I have a huge sense of what is right and wrong and get very upset and anxious if a wrong has occurred.
I don't cope with change of situations or loud noises/ lots of noise in one place. Or crowds.

I'm no good at hiding my true feelings: if I don't like something or someone it's obvious.
I can't hold my tongue; I say what's on my mind or my opinion even if it shouldn't be said which makes me seem balshy or rude.

It's really starting to bug me. I wonder if my mental health issues have been as a result of never having ASD diagnosed. As I have read females are less likely to have a diagnosis and higher chance therefore of mental health problems

Should I seek a diagnosis do you think? Would it be any use? To ha e a label?
Is there anyone reading this who has been diagnosed as an adult who has found it a good thing? Or even a bad thing? Maybe it'll help me fill in the gaps to have a diagnosis. To understand who I am?

My situation was very similar to yours (but without the kids)

I was diagnosed in my early 40s and it has made a huge difference. I have a job I like a lot and now I’m less scared of losing it because they know I have Asperger’s and therefore behave/react non-conventionally at times.

My family know I need time out.

And I know that I’m not odd or weird. I’m just a different kind of normal.

Diagnosis of females is getting better in theory as there is greater recognition that autism in females doesn’t necessarily present itself in the same way as males. But I think some assessors may still focus on Male traits. It’s a bit of a lottery.

But as I’ve said, a diagnosis has been very helpful - liberating- for me as I now understand a lot more about myself.

Good luck.

Thank you, @AutisticHedgehog
That's really good to know.
It took 2 years on a waiting list for my dd1 to even be assessed and a further 2mth to get the diagnosis but it's helped us and her since that diagnosis came. So hopefully if u get a diagnosis too it'll help me, and my family too, understand me a bit more. Xxx

Please don't refer to autism as a label. It's a medical diagnosis like any other lifelong condition. It's not something you can choose to have, then remove the label because it's gone away.
If you are autistic, you are autistic whether you are diagnosed or not.

It's really starting to bug me. I wonder if my mental health issues have been as a result of never having ASD diagnosed
This experience was discussed in the early threads on this board and most people decided they would have understood themselves better if they'd been diagnosed in childhood.

For this generation of children being diagnosed, there's possibly at least one of their parents who is also on the spectrum and who only recognises themselves or the other parent whilst the child goes through the diagnostic process.

And I know that I’m not odd or weird. I’m just a different kind of normal
Well said Hedgehog differences are to be celebrated, so many people still try and promote NT is right and Autistic is wrong. I'm forever reinforcing different is good

I was diagnosed last year. It has helped me understand myself so much. I'm so glad I did it.

I now work and recently they were going to move me to somewhere else, which I was stressing about and would have distressed me due to being noisier and more people constantly around me. I spoke to work and they are rethinking it and I won't be moved there and I've been asked if I would be ok in another position, which I would be. Without a diagnosis, I wouldn't have been able to ask that.

I've also had a colleague say she'd love to more like me! Stuff doesn't bother me generally. I go to work, do my job and don't worry. Stuff tends to roll right off me because it doesn't affect my life.

I came here to ask the same question as the op. Thanks for the answers. It's definitely food for thought.

I was diagnosed in January this year. Oddly, the diagnosis is Aspergers which I thought had been discarded as an asd classification.

I have know/felt all my life that I am different. I’m odd in the sense that I’m better in my own space, venturing out into the social world only when I have to. I have 3 friends whom I would describe as lifelong and some who are transient ie. people I meet every day, walking the dog. However, if I meet with them over several days, I will then HAVE to retreat and go somewhere different because I’m all “peopled out”. I would walk in the opposite direction, head down, to avoid a conversation not because I dislike a person but because I’m just not able to do it, all the time. And yet, if you were to ask these people they’d describe me as quiet but with a good sense of humour and quite clever.

I’m hopeless at social ques. I do have conversation to contribute but cannot work out what to say and often rehearse in my head, before actually speaking. By which time, the conversation has moved on. And that’s why some situations are exhausting because none of it comes naturally.

I’m attractive (so I’m told), good fun once I’m relaxed and know people and might be described as very private or aloof when in fact, I’m watching and working out how I should be in different situations/with different people. I’m a very adept masker/impressionist. What I am left with though is a lack of a sense of “self”. I love meeting up with an old school friend who tells me what I was like because I think I did so much morphing to fit in, that I never really knew who “I” was. I’m not sure any of this makes sense?

I have many sensory issues I didn’t even KNOW were sensory issues. DH just found me quirky. The woman who diagnosed me found me “typical Aspie”. So, there you go!

I had a professional job for 26 yrs. Have married twice. Have an Equity Card (as I say, am a good “actress”), have travelled widely yet much of it is a blur and I have to accept that the real me is a bit of a mystery, even to me!

Hi all... not intending to hijack but can I join in? DS1 is at the beginning of diagnosis Asperger's (sorry don't know the new terminology) and I have had a huge epiphany that I think I might have it too.

iti s a years wait for diagnosis here.

I was diagnosed at the Lorna Wing Centre last November, was originally told (back when I applied last October) that it’d be a six month wait (so the appointment would’ve been April this year). They then had a cancellation so I was able to do it in the November.
The official diagnosis is something like Autism Spectrum Disorder, Aspergers Syndrome profile, with classic women and girls’ presentation. The exact diagnosis depends on where you go/who you see I guess.