Any mothers diagnosed whose parenting ability has come under scrutiny?

[what2eatwhenurbored]

Today 09:30 what2eatwhenurbored

Hello everyone,

Thanks to Poultergoose for passing me the link to add this below. I'm extremely anxious.

(please be kind, I'm looking for experience not opinion, far too much of that online and it's terrifying and unhelpful).

I'm looking to hear from anyone (females) who might have an Aspergers diagnosis after becoming a parent? It's on the cards for my son and I, lots going on.

I see plenty of Dads out there, married to supportive NT women. What I can't find is a mother's first hand experience. My ex-husband also fits AS profile which is very common but the extra early years support my son is getting seems to take that for granted and not question his ability. But as a mother, I feel that I cannot find any examples of positive responses to a late diagnosis during parenting years (the dyspraxia/ADHD we have plenty) but AS type Dx seems on a par with sociopathy or severe MH problems when it comes to parenting abilities in the eyes of professionals.

I'm terrified about what I've read yet I feel it would be irresponsible not to complete my assessments for Aspergers (though if I didn't I function as well as I do the rest of the world would never notice).

I'll continue to carefully consider my options along side what is best for my son - any experiences you'd be happy to share would be gratefully received.

Thanks for reading!

Thanks PG. I enjoyed the Autism Women Matter report. I've read informal threads online and academic papers - all v negative.

I know of course rationally that the negative posts are from adolescents with an AS parent lashing out and needing to vent and unfairly pinning EVERYTHING on AS traits, usually in the mother as mothers are meant to be nurturing blah blah.

I was v upset by a paper that had researched the loss in interaction from a child's nuances and a parent with autism. Yes, there are worse and more damaging behaviours from all parents at times but having worked as a therapist this has upset me a great deal and shaken the bond I felt my son and I had.

A v useful perspective from you re. misinterpretations without a diagnosis so thank you!! Makes absolute sense.

I'm just hoping that the Paediatrician, HV, SALT, OT ....etc won't react badly as I approach a Dx. I'm vulnerable going through a separation and I feel judgements about what's best for my son will not be as respected as they have been so far. I find that terrifying!

Hello

I have not had my baby yet and like you I was a bit scared how people would react to a mum who has autism. I agree people tend to be more relaxed about dads with autism which is unfair. However the doctors midwives etc don't seem that bothered.
There is very little (none actually) support for adults with autism so they will probably think as you appear to be coping relatively well they won't do anything.
There was research out recently that neurotypical parents had to be taught to understand how their autistic child was interacting with them. Nobody is suggesting that they should have their children taken off them. You probably have a lot of insight into your child that other people don't.

Hi I don't want to write to much here but wanted to let you know that I have aspergers my dh has Autism and 2 out of 3 of our children have Autism and we have never had any issues regarding our parenting. I am willing to talk to you more about our lives via pm so if you would like to just pm me

My grandaughter has been accused of fabricating illness as her two children have medical conditions that are being treated. Ss service are persecuting her because she was diagnosed 13 years ago with bipolar, but three phychiatrists assessment ordered by Ss have assessed her and have found no mental health problems and she has been wrongly diagnose by the original professional.mi would like to hear if any mum has been accused and how social/LA are testing her.

I am new to MN so do not how to do this can you assist me. Thank you.