Stately homes equivalent?

[JustBeyond]

I was wondering whether it might be an idea to have our own "stately homes" thread, as a large chunk of those of us with (potential) neurodivergence seem to recognise traits in our parents? Which surely will have had an effect on us?

I guess i feel that knowing i have my own ishoos too, I would feel awkward on the stately homes thread as it is just about the parents, iyswim?

(I have been lurking on SH for a while, but now we have an area, starting a separate one seems like a better idea?)

Great idea.

Once I'd worked out I had asd, I had a shocking realization that my mum was most definitely asd too, and I'm sure my dad also is!

As i was saying on the last ND thread, I had to take my mum to my asd assessment to answer questions about my childhood. I knew before going she would minimise and selectively remember, and then she did exactly that.

It is my dad that i think shares a lot of my quirks (my mum did tell the psych quite a few times how alike my dad and i are), so i think my mum is so used to him that she doesnt/hasnt notice/d things in me. My dad will now, and as ling as i remember, not be in a social situation without drinking - something i have (since actually noticing it in regards to asd) intentionally stopped myself doing.

I have the opposite problem with my mum.
She's spent my whole life telling me that there's sonething wrong with me and then telling everyone else all the embarrassing stuff.
I'm reluctant to have her do the parent part if the assessment because I know she'll lay it all down and it will kill me, but I know that she's the best one for the job because she won't keep it in.

Unless she decides that day that I'm just me and doesn't tell all the stories.

Oh my DM is AS, ditto late DB and late DF; so is DSF.

Will any of the living members of the family admit it? Not on your nelly. They won't even support me.

I wouldn't mind this :) my parents were not abusive but there are definitely things about my upbringing which were "odd" and my parents both definitely exhibit ND qualities. But I don't know if that is NDy or whether they are just showing their issues from their own childhoods, neither of which were exactly carefree and happy :( I don't know if there is really a thread for what I sometimes want to talk about, though. Possibly this kind of thing wouldn't be right for me either. My mum has recently realised that she probably has PTSD which is of course very difficult for her and she doesn't have many people to talk to about it. I think she might have ASD as well but equally, it could just be PTSD causing her to present in ASD ways.

I believe my dad has ASD. He has always really struggled with going to work and having to socialise with people even though he had a good career and could have earned more and more into his 60s. He retired at 50. He spends as much time as he can in his bedroom, surrounded by photography magazines. He has always complained of sensory issues and has extreme reactions to certain tunes which he says keep going round in his head. He can't stand anyone touching his food or clothes. He definitely has obsessions and spends a great deal of time on some strange project which might ultimately turn out to be pointless. He prefers animals to people.

I have always thought he was extremely odd. He has never had much time for me but I think I could forgive him a bit more if I knew he actually probably does have a disability.