Someone was just very kind to me

[Sairelou]

I'm still feeling a bit emotional about it too!

I took DCs to Morrisons cafe as we needed a couple of bits on the way home from the park and they were getting hungry. I went to pay and my contactless card wasn't working I couldn't remember my PIN either and after a couple of tries I was getting really flustered and hoping the ground would swallow me up. Typically I had left my credit card at home and no cash on me. I went to get DS who was sitting down at a nearby table to leave (bracing myself for the inevitable tantrum, understandably!) and the gentleman behind me in the queue offered to pay for our lunch!

I've put something on my FB page and hoping to track him down so I can repay him and I will certainly do the same if I see anyone else in that situation (provided I can remember my sodding PIN).

Years ago I was on the train going into uni to sit a biochemistry exam. Was getting myself in a state about it, looking over my notes and panicking feeling I couldn't understand or remember it all.

Gave a big sigh and the gentleman beside me put down his book and asked what was wrong. He got the story of my pre exam panic, looked at me and said not to worry, I'd be fine.

Just as the train got to the station he said, "And that's speaking as a biochemist".

I passed the exam.

DS was about 12 weeks old and DH had to go away for work so my parents suggested I took DS up on the train to stay with them for a few days. They live near Inverness and there's one direct train we could get so I booked my ticket. Unfortunately there was a mechanical problem with the train & it terminated at Perth with dire warnings we were to get the rail replacement buses only, our tickets wouldn't be valid on any other trains.

By the time I'd wrangled DS, our bag, the pushchair and car seat off the train everyone was well on the way to the buses and I was starting to get stressed when one the station supervisor stopped me on the concourse and asked if I was headed for the bus. When I said yes he said 'you can't take a baby that wee on the bus. Just stop here and we'll put you on the next train'. I explained I'd been told the ticket wouldn't be valid and he told me he'd fix that. He then asked if I needed to fix a bottle for DS and when I said I was BF said 'come on through to the staff room and get a cuppa and a biscuit then, you'll need the fuel'. When the train came he bundled us on in 1st class and told the train staff to make sure we had a hand getting off the other end.

A totally lovely man.

Some years ago, I was visiting DS who lived just outside London. One Saturday evening, he had a ticket for a gig (booked months before) and was staying overnight at a friend's flat, so I booked to see a show in town - I had to catch the last train back from Waterloo to the little station near his flat.
Unfortunately, when I got to Waterloo Station, it was shut..! There had been a fire in one of the signal boxes and all trains had been cancelled. It was near midnight.
I decided to catch the Tube to Heathrow Airport, on the principle that there would be people around, it would be warm and dry, and if necessary, I could stay there overnight in safety. When I got there, all the buses had stopped, so I approached a taxi, explained what had happened, and asked how much it would be to get to DCs flat - £50..!
I thanked the driver but said that I couldn't afford that much and would stay in the airport until the buses started again in the morning. He looked at me, opened the door, said, 'Hop in love, I'm not leaving you here!' and took me all the way - including walking up to the flat door with me because, 'You never know who might be hanging about round here'. I offered him all the money I had - £20 - and he accepted a tenner to cover his petrol. I was SO grateful - and so was DS when he got back next morning...!

fedupslummymummy exactly! A hug or hand holding goes so far, words aren't always needed.
ChrisYoungFuckingRocks I'm so sorry to hear you were alone through that. It's gut wrenching when you're not with your babies, your body is calling for them.
I remember trying to get through the night without them and hearing all of the other babies, I just cried. But I was lucky to have that woman at that time for me. Meant the absolute world that a stranger would hold my hand when I needed it so much.

I had bad PND whixh ended up being chronic depression. Convinced myself to take DD (aged 2) to the local Tesco as we needed shopping and it wouldn't take long. Cue massive terrie two's tantrum on being strapped into the trolley. Weepy me frantically trying to distract her long enough to grab the essentials says something along the lines of 'did you just see that elephant? shall we see if we can find it?'. Screams stop and we manage, with me still weepy, to shop. At the till a little old ladt leans over and says 'the elephant trick was good. You have got this, you know' and gives me a hug. It really helped me and still makes me smile 13 years later

Spinspin - thank you. I remember hearing all the other mothers with their babies and thinking (I was in pain and emotional): You bloody bitches with your healthy babies. How dare you sound so happy when I don't even know if my babies are going to live through the night, and I can't even hold them?"

Many years ago, I had to get into Central London from North London for a final accountancy exam at 9am but tubes weren't running on my line. There were hordes of people waiting for buses and taxis so no hope there. In a panic I crazily decided to cycle into London so went home and got my bike! After a reasonably short way I realised I had no hope of making it in time by bike, so I gave up and chained my bike to a lamppost! By some miracle, a cab was passing and I flagged it down. He wasn't even working but was taking his son to school. Despite this, he drove me to a tube station on another line and refused any payment. He said he wanted to help me as he'd like someone to help his daughter 🙂. I made it to the exam, a bit late, but still passed, thanks to that cab driver.

In the noughties we were having serious issues with DD's Special School. DH and I turn up with DD (strapped into her wheelchair buggy) and toddler DD2. DH went on ahead as I'm decanting everything. Taxi driver asks me what's going on and there's the Headmaster clearly getting highly aggressive with DH in the glass fronted foyer. Not only did the Taxi Driver refuse to leave us, when DH came out (having had DD's possessions thrown into his arms) he helped us get back into the taxi and took us where we wanted to go. Then he refused to be paid a penny for any of it.

On a day when everything was going to pot it meant a great deal to us. An act of kindness when those who are supposed to support your child turn on you.

@rivertamfan i know it's an asinine comment but those of us not in similar situations have no idea. I'm glad someone was there to be kind to you

A few: DD (after drinking) fell asleep on the night bus home. Woke up a long way past her stop about 3am. Crossed the road to opposite stop to go back. Some railway workers down the embankment were being cheeky but their boss came along and asked her what's up. He then stood with her until her bus came saying he wouldn't want his DD out there alone in the dark.
Just this week different DD went out for drinks after work. Was late so got a chatty black cab. She'd kept back £40 for it but in their chat he'd found out she's a nurse at GOSH and he would only accept £20!
Finally, years ago, I was travelling with 3 small children when my plane was diverted to an airport several hours from destination and put on a coach. Older 2 were bouncing in the aisle and I was clinging to lap baby. Older couple came over and took the bigger 2 to sit with them and entertained them the rest of the journey.
You never forget these kindnesses.

My brother died a few months before my GCSEs. A girl I was slightly friends with didn't just let me have her notes for the week I had missed, she had hand copied pages and pages of them out for me (the days before everyone had scanners and printers at home!). She was such a quiet girl, and it just seemed such a lovely practical gesture from a 15 year old.

Bovney that is so lovely

ChrisYoungFuckingRocks Completely understand how you felt, it's heartbreaking. I was fortunate my DTS's weren't in SCBU for too long, and that was hard enough, can only imagine how hard it was not having your DTD's back for god knows how long?

In my job I come across many different kinds of people all making very difficult personal decisions, often very upset, I reach out to them as much as I can even if it just means putting my hand on their arm, always thinking of the woman there for me.

When I was 19 my car started playing up on the motorway on way home late at night. I came off at the next junction and it died on the bridge over the motorway. This was 1992 so I had no phone, I was in the middle of nowhere about 10 miles from home and it was after midnight. I sat there sobbing in my car not knowing what to do. A car appeared on the other side of the road and stopped about 10 metres away from me. A man got out and started walking towards my car, I obviously started panicking. He then took his very early mobile phone out of his pocket and gestured it to me...but placed it on my bonnet and walked back to his car. I called my parents and replaced the phone on my bonnet. He came back over to get his phone and then sat in his car until my parents arrived 20 minutes later when he drove off.

That gesture has sat with me ever since.

My DS wants to join the srmy after Uni.

Last year I was at a cash machine at a petrol station late one evening waiting behind a young guy. This was in a town close to several army bases. He was in civilian clothes but looked like a young soldier

His card did not work.
He tried it several times. And was looking desperate. Then just stood to one side looking lost.

I asked him if he was a soldier and he was. Returning from leave and lugging a large box and a bag with him. Just then his taxi turned up to take him back to base and he wanted to turn it away as he had no money to pay.

I gave him the cash (only £10) and he tried to give me his email and ask for my details to repay me.

At that point I got a bit sentimental and through a breaking voice told him that my one son wanted to join the army and I would hope another mum would help my son if he was stranded. I asked him to simply pay it on in the years to come and help another young soldier.

DH and I were once stuck when a motorway closed, about 300 yards from the Services exit. We had 6 year old DS and 3 year old DD with us and we've all been sitting there for hours. Well, little bladders just aren't that strong so we'd had both DCs at the front of our car, in front of our headlights so they could see, several times.

What struck us was the number of people from nearby cars who were walking up to the Services to buy food etc who asked us if we ok and if the kids needed anything. We were fine but I was touched by how concerned people were for small children they'd only ever seen peeing on the tarmac.

I was at Central station Amsterdam. Struggling up some steep stairs with a heavy suitcase to catch a train. The next minute a young man dressed in a very smart suit. Picked up my case and it was some distance and carried it to the top of the stairs. I thanked him. But he never spoke and smiled the whole time.
.

When my DD was 6 weeks old, I was driving alone up to in laws. What should have been a 3hr journey turned into a nightmare 6 due to dreadful traffic and my car suddenly conked out in the middle lane of the M1 with no warning and I somehow managed to glide into the hard shoulder.

A police car drove up and spotted me in a vulnerable position (by now the traffic was free flowing and fast) and two kind policemen pushed my car along to a safer 'police vehicles only' spot.

This was typical February weather and I called AA who said I was a priority. After waiting 45 minutes trying to keep hungry baby (exclusively BF) warm and standing up on verge of motorway, and still no sign of recovery vehicle, an angel appeared..

This chap in an Audi breakdown vehicle pulled up behind my (Audi) and smiled. "I'm here to help you".
I was so confused as I hadn't called out any Audi breakdown?

This guy had been driving southbound on the M1, spotted me, driven a few miles to the next junction, and driven up the northbound direction to help me. By this point I was blubbing with hormones, bursting boobs and gratefulness.. he plugged in his diagnostic laptop to my car, worked out the problem (garage who had done my recent MOT hadn't replaced something vital correctly) and fixed it..

He was so kind and didn't accept any payment from me. I drove to the next services and was still feeling weepy and wobbly in the Costa cafe . A lovely young chap behind the counter told me to go and take a seat and he would send over a hot chocolate. I fed my hungry baby, the police called to check I was OK.

I felt thoroughly grateful to all of those strangers who showed me so much kindness.. -not so much to the AA who I called an hour later to let them know don't bother if you were still planning on coming to rescue me-

I listened, silently weeping, while a lady talked another lady's little boy down from a humongous tantrum in Boots. She was so supportive of this mum and he calmed down really quickly.

My friend (PE teacher) repaired one of her students trousers - she gave him a pair of tracksuit trousers to wear in the meantime and she sewed them during a lesson. She has a huge heart and does so much for her charges.

Bahhhhumbug it was your story about your lovely lad that made me write mine.

I've thought of another:

When I was in hospital after having ds (after xmisc & IVF & crashCsec)
I was sobbing on night 1 as a Consultant had come and told me he had a 'deformed mouth and would never speak' (those exact words)
( He had a tongue tie, corrected at 3, and never shuts up now...).

The lady opposite me( who'd been bluelighted in with her 4th after haemorrhaging at home, and had thus bumped me down the Csec queue, rightly so as a greater emergency), simply put her box of tissues around the curtain. I went and took it, and we held hands, just for 10 /20 seconds or so, but she somehow clasped both my hands with both hers and it was like a Benediction. She said (from behind the curtain): 'it will pass, it will be fine, you will love each other more than you can imagine'. It was in the manner of Julian of Norwich: ('All will be well, and all will be well and every kind of thing shall be well). Said so gently and so convincingly it felt like an Angel. With hindsight I was probably still high as a kite from all the C-Sec drugs and she just shoved a tissue at me and said something nice, but it felt incredible.

I will never forget her. I don't have a photo of my old lady.
(I think I only just realised!)
I do have a pic of that nice mum of 4 who got me through my first night with her kindness tho.

What a wonderful thread. I've just literally joined Mumsnet now so I can post on it.

When my DP and I were in France on holiday. We were staying in a big city but decided to get the bus to the beach for the day. However that evening we missed the final bus back to the city (the bus driver had given us the wrong timetable) ... so there were no more buses until the morning and we were stuck in this quite empty part of the countryside, mostly made up of holiday homes which were empty at that time of year, the shops and tourist cafes had closed up as it was the end of the day and there were very few people around...

So we began walking, looking for a shop where we could ask for the number of a taxi firm, knowing that there was no way we could walk all the way back to the big city as it was about 2 hours drive away, it would be getting dark soon and I was in trendy but uncomfortable flip flops. To top it off our plane home was the next day so of course I was starting to panic that we wouldn't make it back to the city in time for the flight...

After about half an hour of walking with no shops in sight we decide we have to try hitchhiking, which I have never done before and the thought of which embarrassed and terrified me. However quite quickly a lady pulls up in a nice car with her daughter. We explain the situation in our broken French and she tells us to get in and drives us to the next town, to a restaurant she owns. At this point she has to leave to take her daughter to an appointment but instructs her restaurant staff to sort things out for us, which they throw themselves into with gusto, phoning taxi companies to get quotes for a trip back to the city. Turns out the taxi ride would have been over 200 euros so at that point they change plan and help us to find a local cheap hotel to stay at so we can get the bus back instead the next morning. The restaurant is far too expensive for our budget so we try to thank the staff instead by giving them 20 euro (all the cash we have on us at the time) but they vehemently refuse to take it. I was in tears with relief by the end of it all, they were all so kind. And we made our plane

Years ago when my DD1 was only 3 weeks old I went out for dinner with a women's group I was involved with. I was only 23, a 1st time mum and bf! When my DD needed to feed I went to the toilets to feed her, when came back the Italian maitre d came over and asked where I'd been and when I explained he said that i shouldn't feel uncomfortable and not to do that again. Then just as my dinner arrived my DD started crying and fussing and he came over and just said he would hold her while I ate and he took her and walked around with her in his arms while he did his job and she was fussed over by half the restaurant while I got to eat my dinner in peace. I was so grateful both for him making me feel comfortable about feeding her and for allowing me to eat my dinner when I had been getting stressed and upset because I couldn't sooth her. I've never forgotten his kindness to an anxious young mum who was on the point of tears.

I do try and pay it back whenever I can. A few years ago I was walking my dog, another lady was badly bitten when a dog went for her own and she was trying to separate them. She needed to go to the hospital (fortunately really close to the dog park and my house) was bleeding badly and shaking from shock but obviously couldn't drive or take her dog there with her. One gentleman volunteered to take the lady to a & e and I volunteered to take her dog home with me and keep him until she could get him collected later that day. She was so grateful but it was nothing I was glad to help.

Mine wasn't so much an act of kindness- I was in the que in Iceland doing some food shopping. More and more people stated to join the line, and the cashier rang the bell for a colleague. I turned around to speak to the lady behind me in a general whinge when I realised she was deaf. I don't know much sign language, but we managed to have a whole conversation about he line getting longer? Where we both lived and our children. Her signing and me in broken sign. As I left she came up to me and tapped my shoulder and just said (signed) thank you.
I told dp when I got home and he said I was probably the only person out that day she had had a full conversation with. I felt good after that and hoped that I had given her a smile that day.

Thought of one I had done for me- I was about 7 weeks pregnant with ds2 and myself and ds1 age 4 went to the supermarket. At the checkout I passed out- came around in the recovery position but could not see my son.
Then I was told he was in the canteen- an older couple had taken him in, bought him some chocolate buttons and a drink, so that he didn't have to see me passed out.
I will never forgot how grateful I was to them that day, and how the supermarket still made me pack my own shopping when I came around!!

Almost 7 I was in town with my newborn DS2 in the pram, after dropping off my 2.5 year old DS1 at nursery for the morning. I'd rushed around doing a couple of errands - feeling exhausted after another sleepless night with the baby - and popped into my favourite coffee shop for a cup of coffee and a sit-down. The place was packed, but I managed to squeeze into a tiny table out the back, out of sight of the counter. The baby had just fallen asleep - I wanted to go and get my coffee but didn't want to leave him unattended in the pram (and also lose my seat in the only free table left.) I just sat there with tears welling up when a kind lady at the table next to me said: "can i help? Are you ok?" I told her the (now
-sounds-silly-bit-didn't-at-the-time) "problem." She kindly offered to keep an eye on the baby while I went to get a coffee and snack. I was SO grateful! We then chatted over coffee - she was a parent of two older children and recognised the 'sleepless nights' look and decided to reach out. Her small gesture of kindness has stayed with me since and now, when we bump into each other in the park or in town, we say hello and stop for a chat! Her name is Amanda.