Forceps delivery that was difficult or distressing? We’d like to hear from you

[RhiannonEMumsnet]

Hi there,

As part of the national review of maternity care, we’ve been asked to help bring together a small group of women to share their experiences directly with policymakers.

We'd like to hear from Mumsnet users who had a traumatic or distressing forceps-assisted birth, within the past three years.

If you:

• had a forceps-assisted birth
• found the experience traumatic or distressing
• gave birth in the past three years
• and would be willing to speak at a roundtable discussion with policymakers

please reply below or email [email protected] with a short outline of your experience.

EDITED TO ADD: The roundtable will take place in London on Thursday 26th March, 9.30 - 11am.

We know this can be a very difficult experience to revisit and we're mindful of that. But hearing directly from women who’ve been through it would help ensure those experiences are properly understood and taken into account.

Please do get in touch if you'd be willing to take part.

Thanks,
MNHQ

My forceps delivery was in 2019 but it was so utterly foul that it still feels fresh. I’d be happy to be part of the discussion if the parameters widen

I had a forceps birth in 2022. It is something I think about often. The whole process felt very scary. I’d be happy to take part.

2010. It left me with permanent injuries and PTSD.

Mine was 2012, still living with the damage. Not a day goes by when i wish I’d begged for a caesarean section. I would love to help with the research if it would stop someone having to deal with what I have.

I’d like to take part. Forceps delivery in 2024, which had two failed initial attempts before the baby was delivered by forceps. I was told I was too late for a caesarean when I asked for one. The whole delivery was very traumatic for me. Suffered a 3b tear, PPH and PTSD. Attend a birth reflections appointment which answered some questions but not all.

2008 for me. Forceps with no pain relief. Still dealing with PTSD.

I’d be happy to contribute. Forceps delivery in 2024 after a hideous induction, led to a PPH and blood transfusions. Resulting wounds from tearing and the episiotomy kept getting infected and wouldn’t heal so was referred back to gynae. Currently pregnant and the trauma of the whole thing is massively colouring my feelings towards my next labour.

I really feel like I could have pushed DC out without forceps had they just given me ten more minutes to do so, rather than timing me according to some arbitrary clock of theirs.

@IAmTooOldFor exactly the same for me

2011 here, so way out of zone. Would be interested if @RhiannonEMumsnet manages to round up a decent cohort (from any time period) to maybe ask some follow up questions if there would be some path for doing that?

Having had utterly inadequate pelvic floor care post-partum, and recently having ended up back with the same utterly inadequate team as perimenopause hormone changes cause a second wave of pelvic floor issues, I am gradually joining the dots of far BETTER pelvic floor care than I received through the NHS.

Mostly around focussing on getting weight distribution & spinal alignment right - after pregnancy puts us so far off balance, but there's rarely any time spent on correcting what 8lbs of baby has tilted into a poor position biomechanically, before launching into 'return to exercise'.

Then looking at lots of small muscles around the pelvis which can end up WAY overtight after the physical trauma of a forceps delivery. Particularly if there's any kind of nerve damage which can affect feedback & our awareness of which muscles are actually being used (or not). Although this can happen even if there is NOT nerve damage, as trauma can result in pathways 'switching off' even when they're not actually physically damaged.

Then working on postural alignment and breathing to get the diaphragm & ribs working correctly again, to reduce pressure down into the pelvic floor & area that was damaged/is trying to repair.

Then gradually building up from that to get the cues & positions for every day life to make sure deep abdominals & transverse abs build up strength to support weight & spine, and pelvic floor can gradually build some strength to attempt to recover.

None of the above seems to have been covered by anyone I've ever run into through the NHS, but the knowledge is all out there. It seems sad that there's not a better pathway for imparting this knowledge to mothers who've had an instrumental birth, rather than focussing on 'just kegels'. Which is frankly naff all use if you can't feel anything that's happening properly, your pelvis is still tilted forwards in everyday life because you've not returned to baseline after 9 months of pregnancy, and/or all the muscles in your pelvic floor are jammed up so tight they can barely move because you can't tell what to activate & what to relax, so all of it just ends up holding on for dear life, all the time!

Interested to know if it would be possible to tag on a couple of questionnaires about pelvic floor health & post-partum recovery for this group without hijacking the original purpose, if that would be possible?

2011 forceps delivery. Happy to add my thoughts if the parameters widen.

Totally brutal delivery, very traumatic and caused damage to my child.

Hi @JayJayj - thanks so much for your response. Would you be able to DM me an email address I could use to contact you? Thanks!

Mine was in 2002, I am still suffering prolapse issues which I 100% attribute to the damage from forceps! It horrifies me that they are still used, it’s not okay! Women deserve better.

I will always regret not pushing for a c section. Of course I know recovery is hard but I have had abdominal surgery and I understand the recovery and I still would choose a c section.

Episiotomy in 2018 - happy to contribute if applicable. It was an emergency delivery but no episiotomy was specified in my birth plan. Unfortunately I was so high on adrenaline (and I couldn’t see) that I didn’t realise I was actually having an episiotomy. It was only on the postnatal ward I was informed.

I’m so glad this insight is being sought and shared with policy makers. I had a hideous forceps delivery after 3 days of failed induction in 2008. Told every day that a cesarean wasn’t ‘necessary’ or best for me, even after hours on syntocinon drip that didn’t work. Had surgery 6 months after the birth to repair damage and scarring from repeated infection. Still have problems 18 yrs later. 18 years of ‘unnecessary’ health problems that were probably completely preventable.

I’ve had two. Ten and eleven years ago. Horrific for me, my DH, and both my kids.

@RhiannonEMumsnet Can you let those that don't meet the time criteria why that is so important? This thread shows a list of women who have been impacted long term by forceps delivery, and most of us left to just get on with it. Surely the long term effects should be taken into account by this group? That said, if its a specific study it would be good to know the context. Thank you 😊

Hi @Herecomesthehotflusher, we're specifically looking for recent experiences, which was why we specified the time criteria - the roundtable will feed into the ongoing National Maternity and Neonatal Investigation. That said, your point about the long-term impact of forceps delivery is really important, and we’ll make sure everything shared here is passed on.

You might also be interested to know that we've submitted a Mumsnet response to the investigation drawing on our recent Medical Misogyny report - which looks at ten years of conversations about maternity care and the lasting effects of poor treatment - and our 2023 survey on birth trauma. It’s something we’ll keep campaigning on, so any thoughts on what we should be highlighting and asking for policy-wise are very welcome.

We're really grateful to you and everyone else who has replied for being willing to share your experience.

@RhiannonEMumsnet I think some clear policy guidance that says anyone who has any kind of continence issues post-nataly as a result of an instrumental delivery should:

A- get support from a specialist physio to ensure posture, breathing, and relaxation of the pelvic floor, diaphragm, inner thighs, feet, jaw are all able to RELAX & stretch properly to return to their correct position & range. Jumping into pelvic floor strength work only does nothing when birth trauma has resulted in reduced movement & not returning to the correct anatomical position.

B- be told in no uncertain terms that as SOON as they notice the return of an continence issues as they reach their late 30s/40s (assuming enough help is provided for them to resolve in the meantime!), they MUST go to their GP and ask for local vaginal oestrogen HRT. Even if there are no other symptoms yet and general HRT isn't needed.

The consultant I've seen about worsening prolapse in perimenopause was horrified that the GP had put me on general HRT and not vaginal as well. I have to keep battling to keep it on my prescription despite it being consultant led 😬 But loss of strength & thinning tissues in an area which is driven by hormones & has already been weakened in childbirth is a medically well known link.

Every woman who's had an instrumental delivery deserves to get immediate help with vaginal oestrogen as SOON as they notice any uro-genital symptoms in perimenopause - and to be forearmed with the knowledge that this may become a 'thing' rather than wasting yet more time with symptoms becoming worse without knowing it might be linked, or that there's an easy, very affordable option to help!

For anyone who's not had the level of physiotherapy support they should have done. This is the best program I've found in 14 years, starting right at square one (get your posture & breathing right after the changes pregnancy has on you).

It's done so you self-assess & can bypass areas you don't have problems, and focus on ones you do.

Put together by a US physiotherapist called Betsy who had triplets (😱😱😱) so had to figure her own way back to correcting a spine & pelvis that had accommodated that much extra space & weight to carry around up front!

I'll put the link in a separate post below, in case recommendations/product placement isn't allowed. I have no affiliation, but it has helped me more after 14 years than all the NHS physio/hypopressive workshops/kegels put together!

https://mamamadestrong.com/

Mine was 2011. Still traumatised. Later found on the type of forceps used are BANNED in a lot of other countries. My baby was in distress before I was fully dilated but it felt like they were just doing everything they possibly could to make sure he came out vaginally above everything else- awful drip in hand to speed up contractions as they took me to theatre, big episiotomy, high rotational forceps as he was still high up. I just felt traumatised and butchered because of their pursuit for him to come out the ‘right’ way.

On the plus side it seems like this sort of attitude is far less prevalent nowadays, so I hope things have improved for women having babies now.

@flagpolesitta your experience of forceps is so similar to mine. It’s barbaric really.

My DC has eyesight problems I believe caused by the forceps. Their eye was squashed by the forceps during delivery and was born with the forceps mark over one eye. They now have very limited sight through that eye.

Myself and DH have no eyesight problems at all. I have mentioned to the optometrist could it have been a factor, but they don’t want to be drawn into commenting. One look at the bruise they had on their eye after birth would probably convince anyone.

I was told they’d try the forceps once and if it didnt work, it was a section. I wasn’t informed about the forceps at all. I remember having to sign something while I was on my back in the theatre. But no idea what it was. I was hardly in a position to consent to anything.

Forceps delivey 2014, fractured coccyx very traumatic. It took me over 6 years to be ready to have another baby.

I had a traumatic ventouse delivery in 2004 and I’m still living with the consequences. Episiotomy with 3rd degree tear, multiple stitches that some 22 years later is causing vaginal and anal issues. My baby was in distress and all hell broke loose, I think I had to sign a permission and they said it was that or caesarean but that there was no theatre space. I was in a daze, I had been in slow labour since Tuesday and this was the early hours of Saturday morning. I’d had multiple inductions, felt very poorly, nothing to eat for days. A tiny female obstetrician arrived, the ventouse was attached and I remember opening my eyes to see her pulling with all her might, rocking on the heels of her shoes! I’d had just one shot of pethedine some 5 hours earlier so the pain was high and raw. I was vulnerable, frightened and tired. Thankfully my baby was fine, though became jaundiced and they said the ventouse was a contributing cause. I remember being told that I only had a short time to review the notes of the birth. It was only much later that I realised how dire it all was, and I’m sure I shouldn’t have had the injuries that I’m dealing with now.

Christ I wish I’d known this 15 years ago, I’d maybe have been able to mitigate the issues that I’m having now.