Life after miscarriage

[221284ali]

They say that times a healer but that's not always so,
Time for me seems to eat away and the emptiness inside grows.

Within the space of a week, my dreams of family erupted,
One day I was dreaming of our life ahead, but miscarriage soon interrupted.

Just move on was all I could do as I knew it would be fine,
But as the months tick by it seems the healer is not time.

I'm fine is all I can muster, when asked if I'm ok,
Truth is I dont have another answer, i dont know what to say.

The fog that hangs above me, clouds my ability to think,
Each time I question if I am ok, tears are on the brink.

I dont know why I'm crying but the sadness will not end,
My moods are out of character they're driving me round the bend.

Depression is a disease I've been aware of all my days,
I always thought it could be tamed, I thought it was a phase.

I focus on my health as normal, keep busy, fit and well,
Problem is it's not lifting it's like fighting my way through hell.

The pressure I feel daily is unnecessarily Immense,
I have to dig deep daily as my mask slips in front of friends.

Writing helps me question why I feel the way I do,
Remember someone's always out there, feeling the same as you.

Be ok xxx

Hi there,

I had a miscarriage long years back and remember feeling low. I honestly can't remember for how long I felt miserable, but felt doubtful about getting conceived again, however it was a matter of a few moths and I was pregnant again.

I know it is difficult, but do things which will make you happy, even the little things, which will leave you high.
Trust me time will heal, of course with lots of positivism.

I'm very sorry for your loss

I hope you feel better, but understand if you don't. I have had losses and they all hurt. They were little souls that left a big hole. With time I found the grief gives me small breaks. Like contractions pains, it comes in waves. It hurts more than other times. Continue on writing your feeling down, if you find it therapeutic. There is a pregnancy loss section on mumsnet that I found helpful reading so I don't feel alone. I also write and send emails to an email account I made for myself. But I only send grieving things to. Sometimes they don't make sense but neither does my emotions. If I'm experiencing painful conflicting emotions then who better understands than my target audience (sometimes I'm the target and other times it is address to the babies).