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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

What are your hopes for your daughter?

153 replies

KateMumsnet · 29/03/2011 12:45

Last year, as part of our ongoing support for organisations working on maternal health in the developing world, CarrieMumsnet handed in a Mother's Day card to David Cameron and Nick Clegg, asking them to keep the issue high on the international development agenda. One year on, and there's good news: the number of women dying in childbirth worldwide is falling. But there's still a long way to go, and so this Mother's Day the White Ribbon Alliance is asking Mumsnetters to add their 'Dreams For My Daughter' to those already submitted by families worldwide.

The plan is to send some of these Dreams to Number Ten, to remind the government to keep up the pressure on world leaders to deliver the funding they promised at the UN in September. The goal is to provide 3.5 million extra health workers, which would help to prevent 1000 women a day from dying needlessly in childbirth - and the idea came from a Hadhya, a Yemeni WRA member, whose own mother's dream was that her daughter wouldn't be married at 11 and a mother at 13, as she had been.

If you'd like to help, do post your own Dream here; they can be as pragmatic and personal, or as global and wide-ranging as you'd like. And if your household is a boys-only one, don't be put off - you can post your dream for your son (or for a possible future DIL or granddaughter Smile) here too.

OP posts:
notsweatingthesmallstuff · 30/03/2011 15:28

Along with all the wishes everyone has voiced i also wish for my girls:
That they recognise how fortunate they are to be part of a worldwide sisterhood, and that they take that seriously by making choices that support and protect every member of that sisterhood whenever they can.

ScarlettWalking · 30/03/2011 15:29

That her life be long happy and healthy.

That she reaches her full potential in all areas.

That she be confident in herself and comfortable in her own skin.

newbeemummy · 30/03/2011 15:54

I want above all else my daughter to be happy and healthy, I hope she finds someone who will love her long into her old age.

I want her never to be held back because she's a girl
I want her to achieve based on her own hard work
I want her to feel safe
I never want her to ever have to put up with any form of physical violence.
I want her to be able to persue the career of her dreams be it through talent or hard work.

adamschic · 30/03/2011 17:21

I hope that she will realise, one day, that everything I do and say is with her best interests at heart.

I hope she will fulfil her potential, whatever that may be.

I hope that she will follow in my footsteps and never rely on a man for money.

I hope she will have children because she loves them and will make a wonderful mother.

I hope she shares her life with someone who loves and respects her.

thecatatemygymsuit · 30/03/2011 18:22

To be happy, healthy, successful, confident, and have loads of friends.
Wealthy would be nice too, and if she marries well, then so be it .
Mostly I just want her to be safe and happy forever!

ithaka · 30/03/2011 19:51

As a parent who has lost a child, my main wish for my daughters is that I die before them - I want them to enjoy long and healthy lives.

I don't want their lives and aspirations to be defined by my class and income. I want them to have access to the best education they can achieve, not what they can pay for. I want them to live in a compassionate society that looks after the weak and values its public servants over the pursuit of materialism and greed. I want them to be the one that will choose to do the right thing, not the easy thing, or the thing that will make them richer.

I want them to believe in fairness and equality. In a nutshell, I want them to never, never, never vote Tory!

twopeople · 30/03/2011 20:01

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ArthurPewty · 30/03/2011 20:20

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HanBanan · 30/03/2011 21:30

I hope my daughter will always carry herself with confidence and grace.

I hope she always knows how loved she is and what a wonderful gift she is to me and the rest of her family.

I hope that she lives a healthy life of freedom and fulfills her own dreams.

I hope she finds love and stability wherever she may look for it.

LynetteScavo · 30/03/2011 22:01

I dream my daughter will one day be a mother and experience the joy and love that is being a mother.

I dream my daughter will change the Catholic church and she will ensure the ordination of woman priests. (For me this is a dream, but she seems firmly set on it, although she's only five. The tantrum she threw when she found out she couldn't be a Priest because she was female was um, extensive)

I dream she will always be financially secure.

I dream she will always be friends with her brothers.

Above all I dream she will always be happy and content and free from pain.

And I also dream she will visit me when I am old, because she wants to be with me. For that is the biggest complement a mother could ever have.

KateMumsnet · 30/03/2011 22:21

Hello

We've just had a message from the White Ribbon Alliance; they're very moved by all the lovely dreams you've posted, and wonder if any of you would like to join them when they hand some of them over to Stephen O'Brien, the Minister for International Development, at 11.30am on Friday in Westminster? It's short notice and obviously a bit difficult if you're not London-based - but if you'd like to be involved please do post here (or email us at [email protected])

OP posts:
missismac · 30/03/2011 22:42

I hope that my daughter (now 15) can like herself for who she is both her physical being and her personality.

I hope that she can find a job that she loves, a partner that she loves and who loves her as much as we do, and raise a family to give her joy.

I hope that she won't really have to take on the burden of a minimum of £30,000 of debt in order to begin her working life with a degree. This hope is looking ever vainer.

I hope she has a long, happy & healthy life.

These are the hopes of a Mother for her beautiful child.

GetOrfMoiLand · 30/03/2011 22:49

What a lovely thread.

I hope that I have managed to break the cycle of abuse and self-loathing for my daughter. I had her when I was 17, my mum was 17 when she had me, my gran had 5 kids by the age of 23 and her mother had 10 children, 4 of which were taken away from her.

For various reasons, of poverty, lack of education and mental illness there have been 4 generations of abusive and cruel behaviour from mother to daughter. As soon as I held my daughter I prayed to a god that I don't believe in that it would stop with her.

I hope that I have managed to bring my daughter up to believe in herself, to know that she is loved, that she is the most important person in my life, and that she has choices.

I look at her now at the age of 15 and she is so beautiful and clever. She was born in a good mood and has made me very proud of her.

I hope she goes out into the world and is happy, and meets people who are kind, and if she meets cruel people she is equipped to deal with them.

I hope she looks back on her childhood and know she was loved and treasured.

LindsayWagner · 30/03/2011 23:54

Oh GetOrf. Yours has moved me most of all.

MrsTerryPratchett · 31/03/2011 04:57

I want my daughter to know that she owns her own body. That no one can make decisions about it except her. I would like her to know that she need not live down to the expectations of others, particularly because she will be a woman. If she is beautiful, good and intelligent, she is allowed to be those things (and of course she is all of those things).

I hope she knows we love her.

napoleona · 31/03/2011 08:26

I hope my daughter feels happy in her own skin and 'good enough'. I hope she never accepts bad treatment from anyone. I hope she is compassionate towards others.

ChrissyHynde · 31/03/2011 10:20

Having recently renovated my staircase (its in 2 parts swinging round on itself into a large hallway) a friend of mine was admiring it whilst our DD's were there as well (aged 11 and 12). Friend said to my DD "God you'll look lovely coming down there in your wedding dress on your wedding day!!" my response was " oh God please dont think like that" and turning to my DD said "Just get out into the world and do what you want".
Yes I would want her to get married if it's what she wants but please a flouncy dress and coming down the stairs to go to church from your family home just seems so .....dont know what but makes me feel ill!
I was 8 months pregnant with DC2 and 15 years into our relationship when we married so perhaps that clouding my judgement a bit!!

stripeywoollenhat · 31/03/2011 10:58

i wish her resourcefulness, resilience, good fortune. i want her to respect herself and other people, i want her to be hopeful, and kind. i want her to know that she is beautiful and i want her not to care about that. i want her to go out into the world and live in it. i want the stupid expectations of others to pass her by. i want her to be happy.

i want everything for her. she's my daughter.

Bucharest · 31/03/2011 11:50

Getorf.

You have broken that cycle. And that's a ginormous thing indeedy. x

charlieandlola · 31/03/2011 13:38

I'd like her to be able to read and write her name.
I'd like her to be able to live safely in a community where she can be as unaware of the world as she likes.
I'd like her not to be taken advantage of.
I'd like to have found someone younger than me to appoint as her power of attorney/guardian to take care of her after I am dead.

JulesJules · 31/03/2011 16:10

Ah, well. All of the above

ShoonaBee · 31/03/2011 16:38

Getorf - no one will ever say that I was 'born in a good mood', but that is the loveliest thing describing a dd I've read here, encompasses everything I'd ever want for my dd. Optimism is a rare thing indeed and we must cherish it. Ta muchly for your words.

walesblackbird · 31/03/2011 18:13

My dream and hope for my adopted daughter is that her life is better and easier and more rewarding in every way than her birth mother's. That she grows up to be happy and healthy and that she can take her lifestory in her stride and work through the consequences when the time arrives.

PavlovtheCat · 31/03/2011 20:05

My hopes are that she learns to know, accept and love herself for who she is and who she will continue to become as she grows.

I hope she will be strong in nature, and confident, to have the courage to take some risks in life, not to fear her future and to be excited about life.

I want her to know, like getorf and others, that she is loved, is cherished with my all my heart and all DHs heart. I want her to carry that love and pass it on to those around her, to children if she has them, and to those she cares deeply about. I tell her every day in the hope she will take that with her through life.

I also want her to know too that she has choices as she grows into an adult and that her mummy and daddy will be enormously proud of her whatever her life choices are, that we will be there to hold her hand and give her the confidence to step into the unknown. I hope that she does that knowing that we have hold of her safety net always. (I hope she actually has us as her safety net, my parents were not/are not here to be mine).

TrudyVotion · 31/03/2011 20:58

I want DD to enjoy her intelligence and not feel she has to hide it or be teased for being a geek. I want her to enjoy her beauty but be in control of it, not controlled by it and people's reactions to it. I want her to know she can always come home to me and though I might be surprised or sad or puzzled by the things that go wrong in her life, I will never judge her for it or with-hold my affection. In short, I want her to weather the bad times and glory in the good, and be loved by a good man or I will have his entrails out with a meat hook Grin

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