Twin mums: napping question

[TwinMumStruggling]

My twins are 4 months old. We’ve got bedtime and night time sorted (as in they wake regularly for feeds overnight, but finally know the difference between night and day so go back to sleep after a feed).

I can’t get them to nap during the day. At best I get a bunch of five minute cat naps out of them. All that happens is they get crankier and crankier by the time bed time comes around. Pram doesn’t work, car doesn’t work, they won’t feed to sleep, they can be rocked (but it takes about half an hour if not longer of swapping between them, and like I say only lasts for five minutes). I’ve left them to cry a few times but they get hysterical and they start choking on their own spit.

I can’t cope anymore, I don’t know what to do but I can’t keep on like this.

Please for the love of god someone send tips on how you got yours to nap. I feel quite confident if I could just have one then I could rock them to sleep long enough to get them down for a decent nap.

Much sympathy, it's a very tough stage. I was given a rocker by a friend - like a bouncer but could also be rocked. I got another on off eBay. It meant I could put my two in them at my feet and rock them simultaneously with my feet, whilst I sat down and even had a drink. Worked like a charm most of the time.

Mine are 15 now so I couldn't find the exact one but it was something like this https://www.amazon.co.uk/BABYMOOV-A012433-Babymoov-Graphik-Bouncer/dp/B0792TG578/ref=sr113?adgrpid=50809519582&gclid=CjwKCAjw5s6WBhA4EiwACGncZbfOLIJSsC8o-JLk7xyrEYZg3gDOHNVkaXAaMwqlZKVBrTm5t5nORoCwFIQAvDDBwE&hvadid=259090938134&hvdev=t&hvlocphy=1006965&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=18244108836058321748&hvtargid=kwd-309921240681&hydadcr=10792_1789842&keywords=chicco%2Brocker%2Bchair&qid=1658057225&sr=8-3&th=1

Sorry for the huge link, I haven't got the hang of posting links in the app

At that age mine would nap in their Babybjorn bouncers, being rocked with a dummy. Or if I had visitors they’d cuddle them to sleep.

Speaking to friends I think this age is just when they desperately want to be awake and see what’s going on but also need the sleep so badly. One of mine was awful at this age I felt like I spent the whole day in their darkened bedroom rocking, bouncing shushing etc while he did everything h could to fight it. I stuck with it though and it just improved over time, there were definitely times I just had to put him down and walk away though it honestly drove me mad!
I found dark bedroom, white noise and dummies worked best for us. Might be worth googling age appropriate ‘awake windows’ and try to stick to those I found that really helpful. And also sticking to one at a time and persevering if you can rather than switching between both. Mine are toddlers now going down happily on their own for one long nap a day so it really does get better. But that period was absolutely the worst for me so I get it!

are you trying to get them to nap at the same time? This was my biggest mistake. My twins were very different in sleep times during the day. I know it’s hard, but focus on their individual cues rather than trying to get t them to nap at the same time.

it may work for many twin mums but I wish someone had told me earlier to focus on individual routines rather than one routine.

Did you try a sling? The one I put in the sling used to conk out and sleep for ages. I could then cuddle or rock the other one as needed.

It was around this age I cracked with mine and thought I can't carry on like this with them napping at different times and only for short times. I think it's a major sleep regression at this time and they become more aware and won't just nap anywhere.
I found the nap advice in the Gina Ford twin book really useful, it does restrict your movements as you have to have consistent times and place to sleep but it worked and soon mine were napping 2 -3 hrs at the same time!!
From memory, I put them down in their cots as soon as any sign of sleepiness, black out blinds essential, white noise on , gro bags zipped on (these were my night-time sleep cues) one might grizzle for a bit but they soon cottoned on. The book also really helped when I decided to night wean later on. Good luck , it's a tough age

I second the Gina Ford thing, particularly with blackout. We did keep them in the same routine: I don’t think I could have survived if they hadn’t been made to go down at the same time. It did mean that we woke the second one shortly after the first woke, to keep them in synch.
It can be very hard, but you do get through it.

I’m impressed this thread was only a month ago, feels so much longer 😅

Things have improved massively. They’ve started to settle themselves a lot more. They get sleepy when I feed them now. I can carry them to their cots and they’ve found their thumbs so they suck them to sleep. As long as I hit the sweet spot between not overtired or undertired then they drift off without fuss. Which means we are now slowly starting to fall into a rough routine of long nap in morning, another 45 after lunch and another 45 late afternoon.

Luckily I don’t much care if they’re asleep at the same time; I’ve got a toddler too so it’s not like I get a break anyway.

Thought I’d come on an update in case any other twin mums spot it. No interventions necessary, just perseverance and watching out for sleepy cues.

Thanks everyone that contributed.