3 under 3 and freaking out

[Katieandthekids]

I have 20 month old twin girls and have just found out I am pregnant. I am freaking out about the logistics of every day with 3 under 3. I worry that it is going to be unfair on my girls to have another while they are still so tiny! Help!

Congratulations. Your twins will be nearly 3 when the new baby arrives.

Hopefully by this time they have a bit more independence and their speech will be good and understandable so they're able to communicate with you more and understand more.

My DD was 16m when her sister came along and the biggest difficulty was her not being able to communicate. When she got to around 2.5years, she could talk enough to say hungry/thirsty/need a cuddle/want to play etc. With the ages, hopefully the twins will occupy one another in terms of playing while you sort the baby. You'll be fine

You will be absolutely fine, your girls will be chatterboxes by that age, and they will like to help with the baby. You will just need to be very organised and have a good routine. I've got 3 and I adored them being that age.

Thank you for the reassurance everyone! I am 11 weeks so they will be 2 and 4 months when new arrival is born...

Congratulations 🥳👏

I had a 9 year old, 7 year old and my youngest was 2yr 2mnths when my twins were born. Hectic for a good few months, but now two years down the line it is amazing having a small age gap. My older two were quite helpful fetching me things, and the jealousy I'd been fearing from the toddler to the twins was not too bad.

Accept all offers of help from anyone who offers - cooked meal, to hold the baby, to do your ironing etc etc.

@StillCounting123 that sounds brutal! But yes I think the small age gap will be wonderful in a few years. Also that newborn phase and how to cope is still fresh in my mind

Are you sure there is just one? I have a friend who had 2 sets of twins with 26 months between them……4 under 3!!!

My friend had 3 under 16 months... because the twins were first she found the singleton just slotted in. Good luck!

@Ravenspeckingontheroof

Are you sure there is just one? I have a friend who had 2 sets of twins with 26 months between them……4 under 3!!!

Ha I was just going to say the same. I have an old colleague who had twins (IVF as her and her DH were infertile). They were in their early 40s when the twins were born and they wanted another child. When the twins were just under a year old, they decided to use one of their remaining frozen embryos to have a 3rd DC. Just one embryo was implanted as they didn't want another set of twins. Well, you can imagine their shock when a) it worked first time and b) they discovered there were two babies at the scan. It turns out that they naturally conceived a miracle baby at the same time (ish) that the embryo was implanted. So not even technically twins! But they ended up with 4 kids under 2

Three under 3 and a half here. I can't lie it was brutal the first two years. But they are 4, 5 and 6 now and get on amazingly.
Your twins won't remember a time when the baby wasn't here so don't worry about that!
Is your partner around and supportive?

You've raised twins into toddlerhood, you can Def do one more. Imagine only one baby crying at night for food or poopy newborn nappies at half the rate you're used to.

Are the girls in nursery? Def get them registered for when they're three if not, lots of positive comments about the new baby once they know, get them to help fetch you bits etc

Also think ahead now to who will have them - can they go overnight to someone when you have baby? Can DP save some leave and have an extended paternity leave? Congratulations

There's 18 months between my two but my eldest has ASD and development delay so it was a challenge, maybe in a different way. But the bond the children have is indescribable. I'll admit he wasn't a fan for the first 15 months or so of his brothers life but now they are inseparable.

The early days, I don't really remember them. I was a case of everyone fed, nobody dead the basics in the house got done but the children were first. We soon found our routine and settled in.

My advice would be to prepare the girls from around 8 months, set up the baby gear in the house and the rules around it. Lots of positive books and shows about babies and new siblings.

As much as I hate the phrase due to covid...it will be the new normal and they will adjust quite easily. Young children are so adaptable.

Also in the early days, if you think you've made a mistake, if you find yourself googling at a 3am feed if you can give the baby away and keep your other children...it's perfectly normal. It can be overwhelming in the early days while everything settles down again. Honestly, small age gaps are the best

Haha thanks guys I have had a scan and made them do a thorough check my girls are Identical so only one embryo that split!

I think it’s easier having older twins then one singleton baby than having a singleton than twins…

@OatyBarKid @SleepingStandingUp lovely advice thank you xx

@Notashandyta yes Daddy is very involved and hands on. We make a great team xx

@User5827372728 agree. My best twin mummy friend had a 2 year old when she had her twins. It seemed brutal x

I have a 1yo and a 2yo (17months in between) and have number 3 arriving in Dec, so also 3 under 3. Also concerned about logistics as we have no support network 🤪 but I’m sure it’ll be fine.

I didn't want to ask if you'd had a scan yet re twins again lol. It's one reason I'd not try for a 4th - incase they were 4 and 5 😂😂

You'll rock this new challenge.

lady in my town has a 10 month old and just had triplets

@Sunny4876

You'll rock this new challenge.

lady in my town has a 10 month old and just had triplets

Holy cow

I know,went into spontaneous labour and delivered them all naturally,all 4lbers,couldn't have worked out better really but I don't envy them one bit