friend having twins, what do i need to tell her?

[bealcain]

hi,

a friend of mine found out yesterday that she's having twins. what does she need to know?

good question!!!!!!

probably best if she asks the questions and we just answer them (my dts are 7mths)

Ignore all the doom and gloom merchants! Complete strangers said the most hurtful and depressing things to me when I was pregnant and it got even worse after they were born. Tell your mate to try and rise above it! Having twins is incredibly hard work but ultimately a pretty amazing experience

As a twin myself, I would say:-

Don't call them similar names (e.g.beginning with the same letter or rhyming).

Do treat them as individuals.

Don't be tempted to compare them with each other all the time (hard I know, but vital).

When it's their birthday, encourage them to choose their own ideas (when old enough) for a celebration,e.g. a different cake each, and each choose their own friends to come to a party, and encourage friends of yours to treat them as individuals, e.g. a card and present for each child rather than a shared one.

please, please, please don't dress them the same bit of a pet hate of mine sorry!

Just tell her you will be there for her and will always be available to help feed/bath/cuddle one twin.....Be an ear to bend for her and tell her where we are so she can ask us herself everything that springs to mind

IT'S GONNA BE A ROLLER COASTER!

dont give them the same initial - when they get their own bank account and get statements you won't know which is which. - same goes for any letter.

tell her good things like - they wont have to start school not knowing anyone!

To week 34 I was prescribed Cyclogest which is a pessary which is a progesterone supplement which helps sustain the pregnancy. I also had the jabs which mature the lungs at 27wks gestation in case they were premature. That's what I would advise at the pregnancy stage.
My babies (I don't call them twins) are now 6mths and still sleep in the same cot and are comfortable with that as they sleep well.
I dreaded having twins and wondered how I would cope and have time to give good mothering time to all my children but so far have managed. I now think to myself 'why have one when you can have two?' which is a big change to my pregnancy. Hope your friend is well and not too tired. Twin pregnancies are more demanding on the mother than a single pregnancy. Apply oil on tum from 3mths to aviod stretch marks.

I don't call mine twins either, I call them my babies. they are 4 months old now.

Just tell your friend, that no matter what the gloom and doom merchants say about it being "so much hard work!" etc, it might not be harder than one, just a little more drawn-out.

Generally (and I know i'm going to rue the day I typed these words...) it's not any harder than having one baby was, everything takes a lot longer that's all, so you get more tired, less time, more washing etc.

It is an absolute joy though
Congrats to her.