Toddler and pregnant with twins!!

[Miltonglade]

Hi, I have a 2 year old toddler and am now pregnant 9 + 4 with twins. Does anyone know any good books on the day to day challenges of twins with a toddler please - having trouble finding one !!

I can't recommend any books as mine are 11 now however I can tell you what helped me.
Setting the twins routine around the older child,
Waking twins and feeding at the same times so that they get in the same routine and it's quicker than feeding one after the other,
Routines and organiztion (always having water and snacks for dc1 ready, nappy bag always packed),
Had a special box of books /games for the eldest of things that dc could do while I was bf whereby I could join in if dc did the physical bit like roll my dice or turn the page of a book,
Dc1 had special helpful jobs such as getting nappies, changing mat ready which made dc1 feel responsible,
Get twins to self settle by putting them to sleep together (you can't rock twins to sleep at the same time) I actually requested that only one crib was used in hospital mine slept together until they went into beds and often found they'd climbed into one bed in the first few years,
Have a safe place to put twins when needed,
Babies don't need a bath every day or to wear anything but the easiest things to get on/off,
Bouncy chairs help stay upright after a feed when dc1 needs the potty!
A midwife who'd had twins told me don't take advice from a mum of singletons, find short cuts where you can and just do what you need to do to get through the day and know if all are alive, fed and watered you've done OK.
I think you just get through it and adapt how you do things - I often had one twin in a sling, the other in one arm so then I had a free hand for dc1.
Good luck it's hard work but wouldn't have changed it.

Maybemay123 Thank you so much for your advice I will make a note of all that you have said - thank you again

Following as I’m 10+2 with twins and a 2 year old! Those tips are really helpful! Can I ask how long you bf your twins? I fed my son til he was 15 months but I’m really worried about trying to ebf twins.

Congrats @Miltonglade ! I am also pregnant with twins (29 weeks) and have a 2 year old.

I’m reading ‘The Second Baby Book’ which is pretty good. It’s not about twins but lots of practical advice and tips about having a second baby, helping the toddler adjust, routines, preparing them for their new sibling etc. I also just noticed it’s on sale on amazon at the moment.

Great tips from @Maybemay123 - I am taking note!

X

14 week old twins and a toddler (nearly 3)

Only tip is get your husband/partner to take as much time off as possible at the start! Preferable two months, if at all possible. And have the toddler in nursery at least 2 days a week

I found the Gina ford contented twins book good, have only just started to follow some of the 'rules' so to speak. But I found it a comfort to read pre birth ☺️

If you're intending to breastfeed there is a great Facebook group - Breastfeeding a twins and triplets uk. Loads of great info and support in there.

@ChampooPapi how are you finding the Gina Ford book? I’m a little unsure whether to get it, she gets totally panned on mums et generally... but I’m having some difficulties with bedtime for my twins so wonder if it might be some help.

@crazychemist I think if your having sleep issues it could be really useful. Routine is so important for good sleep after all. I have to admit mine have through random luck no doubt fallen into a very Gina ford daily / nightly pattern. We have always done 7pm bedtime though from about 6 weeks. Everything after 9pm is considered a night wake now they are 4 months and anything before 6am, so we don't feed them between those times now if they wake. Though obviously waited for them to naturally 'sleep through' for a good few weeks before doing this.

It's very contraversial on here though, when discussing night weening even at six months I got some flack for it with my last. I did it though and she's slept through the night since then, but she was ready for it. Babies are ready at different times and I think the twins are ready earlier as they are bottle fed rather then breast. The smaller twin we will feed if she wakes after 4am, and we don't let them sleep later the 4-30pm in the day

@ChampooPapi I think I’ll read it and draw my own conclusions. I’m probably too much of an attachment parent to suit it, but all information is useful!

My small twin goes down like a dream at night, he loves his bedtime routine and starts smiling as soon as I take him into the bedroom. He wakes to feed frequently at night, but as I want to get as many calories into him as possible i view this as a good thing! The larger twin sleeps for longer periods (did a good 6 hour stint last night), so I think he’s getting big enough to not really “need” night feeds so much, but he fights like a tiger as soon as he realises I going to put him to bed, and he spends about 45 minutes screaming before he finally gives in!!! I have no idea why, he’s clearly tired but just HATES bedtime. It’s a really problem as he sometimes wakes his brother and I don’t get to see my DD at bedtime because I’m busy wrestling with the baby!