Feeling lonely...

[RockerMummy184]

Not really sure how to phrase this and I know I'll sound like I'm whining and rambling but here goes...

I'm currently 20w pg. Since finding out I'm having with twins I feel completely alone. I don't know anyone who has ever had twins. No one on either side of our families have ever had twins, nor have any of our friends.

With all the added risk I was told about and the numerous complications that could occur I have done nothing but worry so far with this pregnancy, when I was enjoying every second of it when I had DS.

I have also found that I have been quite ill, due to what I'm told is the increased amount of hormones with twins, and feel like I'm just complaining all the time now I have reached the 2nd trimester. All of my other pregnant friends are feeling fantastic and I'm still suffering with bouts of sickness, headaches and mood swings.

I have also found that the more rapidly expanding bump has created a hell of a lot more aches and pains, and I'm struggling to do things I should be fine with, if I were at this stage with a singleton, like walking at a normal speed, lifting things and sitting/sleeping comfortably.

I'm even beginning to get to the stage where I can only eat small portions due to how squashed everything is becoming, and the heartburn/reflux is awful! (I take ranitidine which has even stopped working as of late!)

Since I don't know anyone who has ever been in this situation I have no one to ask things/complain to/get a bit of reassurance that things are 'normal'. There is a 4 week wait to see my MW so it's not easy to get in touch with a medical professional if I have any queries/concerns either.

Sorry for the long and miserable post.

Not a miserable post at all - you are doing something that is amazing but can also be overwhelming.
My twins are now 18 months old and I remember the shock and isolation I felt when I found out. It took a while before I was genuinely excited but it did come, and after the first trimester I gradually started to 'bloom' and I honestly enjoyed the twin pregnancy more than my singleton. The other good thing is that the boys took up so much space that I didn't eat anywhere near as much as I did in the first pregnancy so didn't gain lots of weight (sorry if that sounds vain!).

TAMBA are worth joining for help and support and maybe find out if there's a twin club near you too? Also I didn't know anyone with twins and even now I sometimes think 'shit, I've got twins!' But they are the best boys in the world and I wouldn't change a thing and I am sure you will feel the same.

Sending best wishes for your pregancy and for when your little ones arrive and hope you feel better soon.

I know how you feel, I'm 36 weeks pregnant with DCDA twins and I've hated every moment of the pregnancy BUT it will be worth it when they finally arrive.
I've had two singletons and the pregnancies were so much easier and you could really enjoy bits. So I can feel your pain but you just have to take one day at a time and remember that you're over half way there!
I second finding a local twins club, it's been reassuring to see other mums pregnant with twins who are facing similar challenges.
Best of luck and hope things get a bit easier for you x

Thanks ladies!

Inky I can see what you mean about the not gaining weight thing. I've only put on 7lb so far, even though I was constantly hungry to start with. I think I had some kind of vitamin deficiency because all I wanted to eat was fruit and veg which was a massive bonus!

I have joined TAMBA and looked into twin clubs but my nearest one is about 40 miles away and as I work full time as well as having a 2yo it's very difficult for me to get any time to attend even if I was prepared to travel all that way!

OldLady you are so close! Are you booked in for induction/ELCS yet? I bet you can't wait to meet them.

sending some hugs, twin pregnancies are tough - everything you mention sounds totally normal to me (I've 'only' had my twins so no idea what a singleton pregnancy would be like mind you!)

definitely try to get to local twins club, or if you can't go in person, see if they have a facebook page - our local clubs both do and these pages are great for 'chatting' even if you can't get to a meet up in person

the other thing to do is simply look out for other twin mums when out and about and stop them for a chat! I met several other twin mums this way - there's a sort of camaraderie about having multiples and you'll find we're generally happy to stop and talk to other twin mums/twin mums to be :-)

good luck - being a twin mum is fantastic, it's worth all the pregnancy pains for sure :-)
x

join the D'ya ever wonder ... threads? Seem to be a lot of friendly twin mums(to be) on there.