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Multiple births

When do you start showing with twins? What is life with twins like? Join the conversation on our Multiple Births forum.

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Original poster

Dress them the same?

22 replies

pupuce · 26/02/2004 23:03

I wondered if parents of twins could tell me more about this.... I wondered why parents of twins wanted/chose to dress them identically???? It is something I have tried to understand. I don't have twins and thought if I had twins I would dress them differently... so I am trying to understand
Thanks

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nutcracker · 26/02/2004 23:06

I always thought, that if i ever had twins, i would dress them in the same outfit but in a different colour. That was when i had no kids. Now i'm a mom of 3 i know that i'd be lucky to get them dressed at all never mind co-ordinating them

Thomcat · 26/02/2004 23:10

Maybe because they think it looks cute.

- So that other people go - oh look twins and don't have to keep asking -So that mum doesn't have to think about who is wearing waht, Doesn't have to think about 2 different outfits with so much else to do. Just buy 2 of everything, pick one out fir out in morning and dress them both, job over. ?????????????

stupidgirl · 26/02/2004 23:12

Nooo, I hate to see kids dressed the same, twins or not.

mears · 26/02/2004 23:18

My mum did that with my younger twin sisters - one of them is in therapy now. One of the root causes of her problems is apparently not having her own identity as a twin. Not a good idea

sobernow · 26/02/2004 23:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jampot · 27/02/2004 00:03

I'm a twin and although mum never dressed us the same, we were always referred to as "the twins" which p'ed me off. Also I always came top of the year and my sis always came in the last 5, so I was never allowed to "celebrate" my achievements for fear of upsetting sis. Separate identities was very important to me.

mears · 27/02/2004 00:04

Are you my sister Jampot?

Janh · 27/02/2004 09:25

I know a family with 2 boys 4-5 years apart and they were dressed identically (from M & S mostly) certainly until the elder was in his early teens - he didn't half get mocked. Coats and everything!

I wouldn't do it with twins either.

Hulababy · 27/02/2004 10:00

I don't think I'd dress twins the same either. Think I'd be more tempted when they were little just to have one big wardrobe for them to share. Then just dress them in whatever came to hand first, like I do with DD I suppose that'd have to stop as they got older as they'd possible argue about it.

Northerner · 27/02/2004 10:06

If I had twins or even same sex siblings I might 'co-ordinate' them for special occassions. A girl I work with has 6 year old twin boys (never dressed the same I might add)and she has a brother inlaw who always buys 1 outfit between the 2 of them for birthdays/christmas etc !

tallulah · 27/02/2004 17:29

I hate to see children dressed the same- twins or not. Up till now I thought I was the only person who felt like this, because other people seem to do it. They also do it with hairstyles. I have 1 DD & 3 DSs. The boys ONCE had matching outfits (aged 4, 6 & 8) as they were in a sale & the only style/colour available, but I felt uneasy dressing them the same.

My mum used to like to see me & my brother in matching outfits (jumper/shorts) & I really felt we were seen as 2 halves of one child instead of as individuals. I have always encouraged mine to be 4 separate people & not one unit.

bunny2 · 28/02/2004 10:41

I thin it is creepy and I would never do it. All children are individuals.

Paula71 · 28/02/2004 21:16

Sometimes I do but never intentionally. The availability in shops is sometimes an issue so ds twins (aged 2)have clothes that are the same but in different colours. They have jackets and trousers that are similar, it is handier if things come in packs of 2 as each item is different.

Unfortunately when I had the boys most of the presents I was given (mostly from family members who don't know me that well) were identical so they wore items on different days. I mark their clothes with their initial (for DH) as it is important they have their own clothes in their own drawers - they get on better I feel knowing not everything has to be shared.

And no one calls them "the twins" in my earshot! Being a twin is special but I try and remind people they are very different personalities.

suedonim · 28/02/2004 22:38

I thought I'd just mention that I saw twins today, who were dressed absolutely identically. They were ladies in their 60's and even had the same iron-grey perms!

Janh · 28/02/2004 22:52

ooh, suedonim, scary!

Sounds like those twins conventions they have in America. Why would adults choose to do that???

suedonim · 29/02/2004 12:03

I suppose if you've been brought up that way, you might not want to do anything different even when you're old enough to make the choice? From what I've read, some twins are so closely intertwined that they almost regard each other as themselves, iykwim. I did find myself wondering if those ladies were married, and if so, had they married identical twins; did they have children who were singletons and did that seem weird, and so on!!

triplets · 01/03/2004 12:37

Hi,
Well having triplets, two boys and a girl I have hated it when well meaning friends have bought them identical clothes, even for Rebecca at times! James is so particular about his clothes, he likes to be told "thats for you", and he wont let Thomas wear it. Of course its different for Rebecca, but she wont even wear Thomas and James out grown jeans even though she is shorter and could save me some money! The only exception I do make is when we go out for the day, say the zoo, I then will dress them the same incase we lose them, we once lost Rebecca and for the life of me I couldnt remember what she was wearing, panic! Even their school uniform, James goes spare if say his sweatshirt is in the wash and he has to wear one of the other ones! I think it is very important to have their own things, they are individuals, after all being triplets they do have to share an awful lot of things anyway, on their birthday in Jan lots of parents and friends gave them a card BETWEEN them, I think thats awful dont you?

musica · 01/03/2004 12:45

I think if I had twins, I might be tempted to dress them similarly for special occasions, particularly when they were babies. They don't care at that age! I remember my best friend and me always dressing the same when we were little, and pretending we were twins (hmmm - she had black curly hair, I had white straight...). But I think it can look cute. Maybe different colours of the same outfit or something like that. But for everyday, no.

fisil · 01/03/2004 21:05

My brother and I had identical clothes - just that I wore them a year after him when he'd outgrown them!

My Mum went through a phase of making dresses for me out of the offcuts from dresses she'd made for herself. That must've looked seriously weird. I was about 6, I think.

Bozza · 02/03/2004 11:39

I think I might have odd special outfits when very young but not on a day to day basis. My Grandma used to buy me and my two sisters the same dress (or maybe same style, different colour) but they were our special outfits - one a year - and not the stuff we wore every day.

I know (not very well) a Mum of twin girls who are aged four. And I have never seen them not identically dressed - same shoes, coats, trainers, hairs slides everything. I've always wanted to ask her, but never dared, if one spills her breakfast does she change them both, then a couple of hours later, the other gets paint on her top, does she change them both again?

sandyballs · 02/03/2004 12:17

My twin DDs (3) like to wear the same clothes - i think it also saves a lot of arguments about who is going to wear what. But they aren't identical - I wouldn't do this if they were. They are so different that I don't think they have a problem with their identity - one is small and laid back, the other tall and stroppy!

motherinferior · 02/03/2004 12:50

I will admit, here and now, that I did once buy the same fleece (a nice one, yellow) for both my girls (there's a two and a half year gap, and the little one is still a baby). And they have been known to wear them at the same time. And they do have similar party frocks my mum had made for them in India, which they may wear in the future (not the same dress, but made of the same material). But in general, of course, I think it's a terrible idea

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