So why have my two STOPPED sleeping once they hit 4 months?

[rednellie]

Everyone round here seems to bandy about this concept that sleep improves round about the 12 week mark. Well, we had two great sleepers until they hit their 4th month. What is going on? They're waking every 2 or 3 hours and will not settle unless they feed. They're actually feeding more than when they were born. Up until then they'd happily go down at 7pm and wake up maybe a couple of times for feeds after that, but I'd regularly get about 4 hours straight at some point in the night. The last week I'm lucky if I get two solid hours.

I'm getting pretty hacked off tbh, we do all the things that help with sleep - set bedtime, no lights on at night, minimal stimulation etc etc. They are ebf and were born at term...any suggestions or does this ring a bell with anyone?

4 month growth spurt and a terrible sleep regression ... Yup, I remember that. Ds was never a good sleeper but at four months it was awful. I vaguely remember just feeding him as quick as possible and going back to bed.

Definitely rings a bell with me, my two were exactly the same. Considering they'd only just managed to settle easily and sleep through a few weeks shy of four months, I was quite a bit hacked off too. I found things didn't calm down for a good month or so (sorry!) and they're still quite difficult to get settled of an evening now at just gone seven months (double sorry!)

Sounds like you're doing everything you can already, otherwise you could perhaps have a think about cutting back their daytime sleeps if possible? From memory at four months my girls were napping about 2 and a half to three hours total during the day, no more. (This is just what worked for us, of course.)

Another thing with my twins at that age was really giving them a hell of a lot of time playing on the floor; tummy time before the evening routine in particular seemed to really wear them out at that stage!

Other than that, all I can really offer is sympathy! My two are still utterly rubbish at settling down for naps and bedtime, but thankfully have a good uninterrupted ten to twelve hours overnight at seven months, although my under-eye bags would suggest otherwise.

sounds horribly familiar (even after many years - my sons now heading for high school...) My son was lovely and settled in a feeding and sleeping routine at 2-3 months, but by 4 months it all went to pot. Health visitor said it was too early to wean, but I got him started on solids, and we got our nights back again (for a short while...) He was just too hungry to survive on milk by 4 months.

However we were next hit by the teething which drove us potty with terrible nights that got worse and worse until the 4 front teeth came through. That started really early, months and months before the teeth actually broke through. I had no idea that teething could do that, it might well be what is starting. That or hunger!!

I dont know what you can get now for teething, powders and gels etc, but don't be afraid to use calpol or equiv, it will save your life. I pussyfooted around with my son afraid that it would be a harmful thing to do and tried all sorts of other remedies. With my daughter I had no qualms, just shoved it down her during the teething period so it wouldn't harm my sanity! she is absolutely fine btw!!!

4 months is def the age for both needing more food and teeth starting to come through. Just when you think you are through the worst of sleepless nights these do hit you at this age. Especially with twins, you must be really going through the mill. Good luck and hope you manage to get things settled a bit soon!!

Google four month sleep regression. It's a developmental leap so their brains are busy and they can't sleep as well. It's not a sign they need solids....

Bumgrapesofwrath - I think it depends on the child, it was hunger for us, it might be some other thing going on for someone else. It the babies are starting to wake up wanting to feed at night and being unsettled again, its worth considering some kind of physical discomfort, don't just dismiss it because of something you have read on the internet.

The pattern that OP describes sounds very much like what we went through and it turned out our son became unsettled and wanted to feed again in the night for the simple reason that he was physically uncomfortable due to hunger and teething pain. It was not just that he was awake and not wanting to sleep.

Its worth considering all options, imho.

My boys slept through the night from 3 to 5 months. Then they didnt.... At its worst DT2 was waking every 90 mins to 2 hours, with 2 or 3 wakings from DT1. Solids at 6 months certainly didn't help and I wish I had held off another month or so. The only thing that has worked for us is bfing back to sleep. It takes about 10-15 mins and I get to go straight back to sleep too. We co-sleep with the most unsettled most nights.

That may not fill you with optimism but from anecdotal evidence we are at one end of the scale and I have adapted. I sometimes have a quick nap with them in the afternoon and try to get a really early night once a week.

I tried lots of stuff (No Cry Sleep Solution etc) but I found I function best when I expect them to wake and roll with it rather than trying to fight their natural pattern.

(Sorry for long absence - we're in Canada so only morning now, iyswim)

Thank you all! At the very least you've made me feel normal and that we're not alone. And secondly I think the whole 4 month sleep regression sounds about right - I went in to settle them again last night at 10pm and DT2 was mid roll! They've both been at it rolling all over the place so some kind of developmental link makes perfect sense to me. I'm also reassured with what some of you are saying about giving a quick bf and all going back to sleep - it's sometimes hard to know whether that's a help or a hindrance, but it seems the obvious thing to do as they're too young to 'sleep train'. And I don't want to start solids (although I totally take your point needanothercuppa about babies being different) as they were born at 38 weeks so they're still little uns and I always thought we weaned DD too early...

Thanks for all other thoughts apart from you evil ones who said this will go on for MONTHS - here I was thinking I knew it all, but obviously have loads more to learn!